Hoss
Make America's Team Great Again
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Marriage and the Power of Divorce
- Thread starter Grumpus
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
moonarchia
The Scientific Shitlord
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Tarrant
<Prior Amod>
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Onoes
Trakanon Raider
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Man guys, listen to this horror story. I'm going to tell it in 2 parts - The Preface and the NOW.
This is the Preface.
Friend of mine (Lets call him Jay), who is a nice guy but a total slacker, married his high school girlfriend like 20 years ago. She's a total ballbreaker, resting bitch face, just no fun at all - and no one understood the relationship. Best any of us could tell she was just the easy option and he stuck with it. 5 years into their marriage they have a daughter. He's pretty much perpetually unhappy at home, but still has tons of nerd hobbies, wife mostly just lets him do whatever. Basically she's just his mom-wife, giving him chores and shit and making him actually contribute to things, but its been clear they really don't even like each other to everyone else the entire time.
So, 14 years into their marriage (around 2015, after my divorce and Jay seeing how much happier I was all the time) he starts helping another friends wife out on a project - some podcast type stuff she was getting into, and they start getting close. She confesses she caught her husband cheating on her and she wants to leave him, Jay unloads about how he's trapped in a loveless marriage and he wants out. They start having an affair - this goes on for 3 months unbeknownst to anyone. They decide that they are both going to confess to their partners on the same day that they are leaving them. Jay rents an apartment they are both going to live in after those conversations. This also happens to be the day of good mutual friends birthday party, so their plan is they will meet at the apartment AND THEN come to the birthday party together and explain to probably 30 people the situation.
No idea how they thought that was going to go, since all of us know their partners and it puts everyone in a super weird place. So here is what happens.
He tells his wife, he ends up confessing everything in way too much detail, she threatens to call the police if he doesn't leave. Now, the dude didn't pack or anything, he thought it was all going to be civil and they would probably cry and hug it out and shake hands or something, NOPE, she was ready to kill him. So he leaves nd goes to the apartment with nothing to meet up with his mistress. She doesn't show, he's texting her like crazy, radio silence. Eventually Jay shows up to the birthday party, hours late, in tears and distress. He proceeds to tell all of us what is happening and he's worried his mistresses husband may have done something, and he's worried that if he goes to the house the husband may kill him or something. This is met with a ton of reactions, some of us are telling him he's an idiot piece of shit, others are trying to comfort him, its all over the place. One of the ladies there said she would call and see if she could talk to them before anyone there physically drove to the girls house.
She comes out of the house shortly after the call and she says "I just called her, she was clearly crying but she said everything is fine she is just emotional. She said she will call you tomorrow." So again, lots of different reactions, but no one really does anything and everyone just goes home that night wondering what's going to happen.
A couple of days later another mutual friend calls me and asks if I will go out to lunch with a few people, one of them being Jay, as they are worried about him. I met them all at a little coffee type place with a back patio area and Jay was just a wreck. He explained that he had gone back to the apartment and basically sat up all night wondering if she was dead and just couldn't talk freely on the phone. He tried texting her more the next day and heard nothing until about 7pm when she called him from her husbands phone and asked him to meet her at a restaurant to talk. She wouldn't really say anything else, but she assured him that her husband wouldn't be there, and she just needed to talk to him in a public place. So, she gets off the phone, he's understandably afraid that he's going to die or get his teeth kicked in or something, but he goes anyway because he's still clueless.
He gets to the restaurant and she is there by herself, he sits at the table and she tells him that she's very sorry, but when she told her husband he was devastated. He swore he would do whatever it takes to fix their relationship, he admitted to cheating and said it was a spur of the moment thing and it would never happen again, that he would go to counseling and yada yada. She had never seen her husband cry before, and she knew he really meant everything he was saying and they both cried and.. well they were going to try to work it out. She shut off her phone and would be changing her number, she wasn't ever going to have any contact with Jay again, and in fact her and her husband decided they were going to move to a town about 2 hours away so they could start over. She apologized some more and eventually said she was sorry and she was leaving. He tried to follow her out while begging her to talk to him but she told him her husband was in the car in the parking lot and Jay needed to sit back down. Their deal was that she get to tell Jay how it was going to be and say goodbye, but if Jay walked out of the restaurant with her- the husband was allowed to intervein. So she told him to sit back down and order something, and not to follow her out, then she left.
So, now the dude had blown up his whole life, fucked any chance of cooperation from his soon to be ex-wife, was in an unfurnished apartment with nothing....
We all told him he royally fucked up, but you know, keep your head together and work hard and yada yada. Everyone tried to help him out with advice, but it was kind of a "fuck around and find out" situation you know?
So anyway, he mostly gets all his shit together eventually, and after about a year in the 50% depressed bachelor and 50% single dad thing... he recovered enough to start talking to a girl online..... and that's when stuff starts getting worse.
Stay tuned for second part (really the part that set me off tonight on this whole thing) I'll try to type it up tomorrow.
This is the Preface.
Friend of mine (Lets call him Jay), who is a nice guy but a total slacker, married his high school girlfriend like 20 years ago. She's a total ballbreaker, resting bitch face, just no fun at all - and no one understood the relationship. Best any of us could tell she was just the easy option and he stuck with it. 5 years into their marriage they have a daughter. He's pretty much perpetually unhappy at home, but still has tons of nerd hobbies, wife mostly just lets him do whatever. Basically she's just his mom-wife, giving him chores and shit and making him actually contribute to things, but its been clear they really don't even like each other to everyone else the entire time.
So, 14 years into their marriage (around 2015, after my divorce and Jay seeing how much happier I was all the time) he starts helping another friends wife out on a project - some podcast type stuff she was getting into, and they start getting close. She confesses she caught her husband cheating on her and she wants to leave him, Jay unloads about how he's trapped in a loveless marriage and he wants out. They start having an affair - this goes on for 3 months unbeknownst to anyone. They decide that they are both going to confess to their partners on the same day that they are leaving them. Jay rents an apartment they are both going to live in after those conversations. This also happens to be the day of good mutual friends birthday party, so their plan is they will meet at the apartment AND THEN come to the birthday party together and explain to probably 30 people the situation.
No idea how they thought that was going to go, since all of us know their partners and it puts everyone in a super weird place. So here is what happens.
He tells his wife, he ends up confessing everything in way too much detail, she threatens to call the police if he doesn't leave. Now, the dude didn't pack or anything, he thought it was all going to be civil and they would probably cry and hug it out and shake hands or something, NOPE, she was ready to kill him. So he leaves nd goes to the apartment with nothing to meet up with his mistress. She doesn't show, he's texting her like crazy, radio silence. Eventually Jay shows up to the birthday party, hours late, in tears and distress. He proceeds to tell all of us what is happening and he's worried his mistresses husband may have done something, and he's worried that if he goes to the house the husband may kill him or something. This is met with a ton of reactions, some of us are telling him he's an idiot piece of shit, others are trying to comfort him, its all over the place. One of the ladies there said she would call and see if she could talk to them before anyone there physically drove to the girls house.
She comes out of the house shortly after the call and she says "I just called her, she was clearly crying but she said everything is fine she is just emotional. She said she will call you tomorrow." So again, lots of different reactions, but no one really does anything and everyone just goes home that night wondering what's going to happen.
A couple of days later another mutual friend calls me and asks if I will go out to lunch with a few people, one of them being Jay, as they are worried about him. I met them all at a little coffee type place with a back patio area and Jay was just a wreck. He explained that he had gone back to the apartment and basically sat up all night wondering if she was dead and just couldn't talk freely on the phone. He tried texting her more the next day and heard nothing until about 7pm when she called him from her husbands phone and asked him to meet her at a restaurant to talk. She wouldn't really say anything else, but she assured him that her husband wouldn't be there, and she just needed to talk to him in a public place. So, she gets off the phone, he's understandably afraid that he's going to die or get his teeth kicked in or something, but he goes anyway because he's still clueless.
He gets to the restaurant and she is there by herself, he sits at the table and she tells him that she's very sorry, but when she told her husband he was devastated. He swore he would do whatever it takes to fix their relationship, he admitted to cheating and said it was a spur of the moment thing and it would never happen again, that he would go to counseling and yada yada. She had never seen her husband cry before, and she knew he really meant everything he was saying and they both cried and.. well they were going to try to work it out. She shut off her phone and would be changing her number, she wasn't ever going to have any contact with Jay again, and in fact her and her husband decided they were going to move to a town about 2 hours away so they could start over. She apologized some more and eventually said she was sorry and she was leaving. He tried to follow her out while begging her to talk to him but she told him her husband was in the car in the parking lot and Jay needed to sit back down. Their deal was that she get to tell Jay how it was going to be and say goodbye, but if Jay walked out of the restaurant with her- the husband was allowed to intervein. So she told him to sit back down and order something, and not to follow her out, then she left.
So, now the dude had blown up his whole life, fucked any chance of cooperation from his soon to be ex-wife, was in an unfurnished apartment with nothing....
We all told him he royally fucked up, but you know, keep your head together and work hard and yada yada. Everyone tried to help him out with advice, but it was kind of a "fuck around and find out" situation you know?
So anyway, he mostly gets all his shit together eventually, and after about a year in the 50% depressed bachelor and 50% single dad thing... he recovered enough to start talking to a girl online..... and that's when stuff starts getting worse.
Stay tuned for second part (really the part that set me off tonight on this whole thing) I'll try to type it up tomorrow.
- 7
- 3
- 2
Big Phoenix
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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OU Ariakas
Diet Dr. Pepper Enjoyer
- 7,286
- 20,383
- 46,597
- 214,424
Part two is going to involve buying a chest freezer large enough for bodies.
- 1
Hatorade
A nice asshole.
- 8,458
- 7,204
If part 2 is he went back to her and it is worse then ever but he is staying anyway then major loss.
Kithani
Blackwing Lair Raider
- 1,251
- 1,573
Nah I’m gonna go with ordered a burger, it was undercooked and he got E. coli
zzeris
King Turd of Shit Hill
- 20,277
- 85,875
Part 2 is where he hooks up with the fat, pink haired waitress because she sees an easy mark and he needs solace. Days later, when she calls about being pregnant and going to the cops over him raping her....sorry guys but
Onoes
said I couldn't spoil any more of it.
Onoes
Trakanon Raider
- 1,460
- 1,225
Part two - The NOW.
So, picking up where I left off. He met a girl online who lives just over 2 hours away (lets just call her Jade). Every time I see him he's gushing about her, he's driving up to her every weekend and is like "This girl is a bombshell, and a total freak. She's asking me to tie her up and jerk off on her, do anything I can imagine really, plus she's fucking and sucking every chance she gets, I can't believe how amazing this is". So cool, good for you man, she sounds like fun, but I would be super hesitant to get your hopes up for more than a good time. If she's a fuck machine smoke show and she's single? She's probably crazy right? He's adamant she's a huge nerd and just his dream girl. I ask what she does and... well she's between jobs and doesn't really know what she wants to do. Ok.. so where is she living? She lives in a house with a few of her close friends. Ok... so that's why he has to go see her, she has no money or car. These are all red flags dude.
He handwaves it all away.
A couple months later he announces she's coming to live with him and he's very excited. I should say that during those months, every single time I saw him he was showing everyone pictures of her naked and shit, and yeah, her head was always blacked out but she did have a crazy nice body, so it was easy to see why he was trying extra hard to believe this was his destiny and he had hit the jackpot. After she moved down, my wife and I invited Jay and Jade over for dinner and a hangout to meet her. So, when they show up we are met with this - A SUPER young looking chick, who is maybe 5 foot tall with a banging body, wearing tiny little cut off jeans and a mesh shirt with nothing underneath, just "THESE ARE MY TITS" in your face. Then you look up at her face and... ouch. Just the most clear cut case of Butter Face I'd ever seen. Super weird to be both turned on and off by this girl at the same time haha, but yeah, it was kind of a shock. Plus the whole "Hi, hope its cool I'm half naked, I've heard so much about you guys and we're going to be BEST FRIENDS!" kind of attitude she had.
And honestly, we did like her, she was funny and had a quick wit, and seemed pretty smart (we played a couple of card games that night and she was killing it). I did ask if she was old enough for a drink to kind of bring up her age in a jokey way. He was 37, and she was 22, so a 15 year age gap. But yeah, overall, she was definitely a wacky weird girl, but she was fun and we were like "Well, good for them I guess" but didn't really expect much long term.
So, that was pretty close to 5 years ago, and our entire perspective has shifted greatly in that time. I could type up a ton of pages on the huge shitstorms, but let me try and bullet point stuff.
- She has never had a job the entire time they have been together.
- Money keeps being an issue, and they have now done 4 different GoFundMe's to raise money for themselves (or in one case their dog)
- His Ex-wife and Jade do not get along, at one point they got in a big fight because Jade was literally just wearing all the now 13-14 year old girls clothes because they are the same build (which is creepy as fuck to me personally when I see them together)
- I ended up having to block her on Facebook because she just post 30-50 things a day about how shitty men are, how shitty the gov is, etc etc. Just whatever the ultra liberal talking point is that day. Even shit I totally agree with her on.. I couldn't stand getting the constant notifications about.
- She started an OnlyFans and similar things on multiple other sites, just whoring for whatever money she can get.
- She escalated it to selling her used underwear online.
- She proudly talks about all of this at every single event I see her at, often in front of the kid.
- They have adopted like 7 dogs.. big fucking giant Irish Wolfhound dogs that are 100% out of control and untrained, just destroying everything.
- She began talking about all of her phantom illnesses and stuff years ago, and how she can't do anything because she doesn't have enough Spoons (if you don't know what that means google it), so there is always an excuse for her to not pitch in or do anything she doesn't want to.
-They moved her disabled mother and mentally handicapped sister into their garage last December, as they needed a place to stay and Jay and Jade need income from wherever they can get it (he actually has a really good job... but they are brain dead when it comes to managing money at all)
-They did get married 2 years ago... and just had their first daughter as well.
- I also just found out they refinanced their house to try and pay off some of the debt they have accrued.
And man, this whole thing has been like a slow motion train derailment over the last few years, but last night one of my friends sent me some photos. Jay and Jade had shown up at a get together with... Jade in a wheelchair AND a very butch lesbian woman. Apparently, Jades made up illness has progressed to Jay having to wheelchair her around most of the time because walking is just too tiring. On top of that, apparently they put out ads saying they were looking for someone to move in with them and clean the house/do chores in exchange for free rent. Jays is the only one working, but their house is constantly a disaster because no one does anything. So they effectively hired this woman be their maid in exchange for free rent. Well, in less than a month this butch girl and Jade have discovered they are attracted to each other, and so they talked with Jay and he's allowing it.
So yes. This dude now lives in a pig sty, with 7 dogs, his disabled mother in law, his wifes mentally handicapped sister, his physically disabled and extremely feminist/liberal wife, and her new butch girlfriend. His own daughter is like 14-15 and SUPER weird now (no surprise), and he has a new baby.
Dude is just fucked, he did it to himself, but Jesus, this is one of those situations where if he killed himself I would be like "Yup, I get it."
But yeah, I saw those wheelchair pictures and went... fuck his life, and wanted to anonymously rant about how fucking stupid people are.
Hope you enjoyed.
So, picking up where I left off. He met a girl online who lives just over 2 hours away (lets just call her Jade). Every time I see him he's gushing about her, he's driving up to her every weekend and is like "This girl is a bombshell, and a total freak. She's asking me to tie her up and jerk off on her, do anything I can imagine really, plus she's fucking and sucking every chance she gets, I can't believe how amazing this is". So cool, good for you man, she sounds like fun, but I would be super hesitant to get your hopes up for more than a good time. If she's a fuck machine smoke show and she's single? She's probably crazy right? He's adamant she's a huge nerd and just his dream girl. I ask what she does and... well she's between jobs and doesn't really know what she wants to do. Ok.. so where is she living? She lives in a house with a few of her close friends. Ok... so that's why he has to go see her, she has no money or car. These are all red flags dude.
He handwaves it all away.
A couple months later he announces she's coming to live with him and he's very excited. I should say that during those months, every single time I saw him he was showing everyone pictures of her naked and shit, and yeah, her head was always blacked out but she did have a crazy nice body, so it was easy to see why he was trying extra hard to believe this was his destiny and he had hit the jackpot. After she moved down, my wife and I invited Jay and Jade over for dinner and a hangout to meet her. So, when they show up we are met with this - A SUPER young looking chick, who is maybe 5 foot tall with a banging body, wearing tiny little cut off jeans and a mesh shirt with nothing underneath, just "THESE ARE MY TITS" in your face. Then you look up at her face and... ouch. Just the most clear cut case of Butter Face I'd ever seen. Super weird to be both turned on and off by this girl at the same time haha, but yeah, it was kind of a shock. Plus the whole "Hi, hope its cool I'm half naked, I've heard so much about you guys and we're going to be BEST FRIENDS!" kind of attitude she had.
And honestly, we did like her, she was funny and had a quick wit, and seemed pretty smart (we played a couple of card games that night and she was killing it). I did ask if she was old enough for a drink to kind of bring up her age in a jokey way. He was 37, and she was 22, so a 15 year age gap. But yeah, overall, she was definitely a wacky weird girl, but she was fun and we were like "Well, good for them I guess" but didn't really expect much long term.
So, that was pretty close to 5 years ago, and our entire perspective has shifted greatly in that time. I could type up a ton of pages on the huge shitstorms, but let me try and bullet point stuff.
- She has never had a job the entire time they have been together.
- Money keeps being an issue, and they have now done 4 different GoFundMe's to raise money for themselves (or in one case their dog)
- His Ex-wife and Jade do not get along, at one point they got in a big fight because Jade was literally just wearing all the now 13-14 year old girls clothes because they are the same build (which is creepy as fuck to me personally when I see them together)
- I ended up having to block her on Facebook because she just post 30-50 things a day about how shitty men are, how shitty the gov is, etc etc. Just whatever the ultra liberal talking point is that day. Even shit I totally agree with her on.. I couldn't stand getting the constant notifications about.
- She started an OnlyFans and similar things on multiple other sites, just whoring for whatever money she can get.
- She escalated it to selling her used underwear online.
- She proudly talks about all of this at every single event I see her at, often in front of the kid.
- They have adopted like 7 dogs.. big fucking giant Irish Wolfhound dogs that are 100% out of control and untrained, just destroying everything.
- She began talking about all of her phantom illnesses and stuff years ago, and how she can't do anything because she doesn't have enough Spoons (if you don't know what that means google it), so there is always an excuse for her to not pitch in or do anything she doesn't want to.
-They moved her disabled mother and mentally handicapped sister into their garage last December, as they needed a place to stay and Jay and Jade need income from wherever they can get it (he actually has a really good job... but they are brain dead when it comes to managing money at all)
-They did get married 2 years ago... and just had their first daughter as well.
- I also just found out they refinanced their house to try and pay off some of the debt they have accrued.
And man, this whole thing has been like a slow motion train derailment over the last few years, but last night one of my friends sent me some photos. Jay and Jade had shown up at a get together with... Jade in a wheelchair AND a very butch lesbian woman. Apparently, Jades made up illness has progressed to Jay having to wheelchair her around most of the time because walking is just too tiring. On top of that, apparently they put out ads saying they were looking for someone to move in with them and clean the house/do chores in exchange for free rent. Jays is the only one working, but their house is constantly a disaster because no one does anything. So they effectively hired this woman be their maid in exchange for free rent. Well, in less than a month this butch girl and Jade have discovered they are attracted to each other, and so they talked with Jay and he's allowing it.
So yes. This dude now lives in a pig sty, with 7 dogs, his disabled mother in law, his wifes mentally handicapped sister, his physically disabled and extremely feminist/liberal wife, and her new butch girlfriend. His own daughter is like 14-15 and SUPER weird now (no surprise), and he has a new baby.
Dude is just fucked, he did it to himself, but Jesus, this is one of those situations where if he killed himself I would be like "Yup, I get it."
But yeah, I saw those wheelchair pictures and went... fuck his life, and wanted to anonymously rant about how fucking stupid people are.
Hope you enjoyed.
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Springbok
Karen
- 9,386
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