Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Daidraco · 2025-03-18T11:45:29-0400

BrutulTM said:
So did these dudes try to make it look like an accident or something? Or did they just turn themselves in and go "I did it, take me to prison"?

After 50 years of marriage, I always figured it would look more like Geralds Game. One of them just dead on top of the other from a fucking stroke. Your significant other killing you in your sleep is some brutal ass shit. In your 70's at the least. Like fuckin hell - what is even the point of killing your SO at that age. What, did she wobble, fall, land on some dudes blue chew dick?

Control · 2025-03-18T11:52:13-0400

Hatorade said:
Seriously what kind of abuse or fucked up situation makes old married people kill each other?

I imagine that certain heath issues (on either side) could lead to something like this. Terrible, but less terrible than it being malicious.

Phazael · 2025-03-18T11:59:59-0400

Hatorade said:
Gonna need examples because if Wife and I ever split gonna need to be prepared for whats out there.

Buy a pocket pussy and become a hermit. Seriously, its really bad out in the wild. Every unmarried male friend I have has basically given up and these are near chad level guys who mocked me for getting married to a nerdy redhead I met through EQ. Either you are so top that you just pump and dump or its a bleak wasteland of pointless hookups and crazy. There is no middle ground left.

Captain Suave · 2025-03-18T12:09:40-0400

Aldarion said:
Think back to the first time the chick you're with did that annoying thing she does. It was no big deal, you laughed it off.
Then compare that with when she did it again, last week, for the hundredth time.

Now imagine shes been doing that thing for 50 fucking years, she doesnt even pretend not to do that annoying thing anymore, and gets annoyed at you for even noticing it.

I'm kind of surprised there arent more old spouse murders, and am always sincerely impressed with the multi decade marriages.

Best piece of relationship advice my dad ever gave me:

Take a good, sober look at your partner. Think of all the things that annoy you, or you wish were different. Can you put up with this FOREVER in exchange for the parts of them you love? Every. Fucking. Day. FOREVER?? If yes, great! If no, GTFO and don't waste everyone's time.

People don't change with age; they distill.

Noodleface · 2025-03-18T12:22:55-0400

Rather than looking into why the dude murdered her we should instead be focusing on what she did to make him murder her, that whore

Cutlery · 2025-03-18T12:39:40-0400

BrutulTM said:
So did these dudes try to make it look like an accident or something? Or did they just turn themselves in and go "I did it, take me to prison"?

My guy did. I'll try to dig up the court report later

Larnix · 2025-03-18T13:50:11-0400

Since we are all sharing I know a murderer story here is mine,

Summer of 2004, Southern Ohio, my dad was always wheeling and dealing, often with some shady dudes. He met a guy that had a auto repair shop and they started trading for work done. One day my younger brother and I meet him and my dad at his shop, the guy has tattoos all over. My brother who is 6'4" about 300 pounds lots of tattoos himself asks about the one on his arm. He tells us that the parts of the tattoo are for people he killed, if they are filled in the bodies have been found, if its just the outline the body hadn't been found yet. My brother all of 22 says "yeah right mother fucker, anybody could say that shit'. 6 months or so later he came to my dad with a deal that was basically to go to be true to trade for his truck because he needed to get out of town for awhile.

Michael Fogt was convicted of two county murders - The Times Gazette

Editor’s note — This is the first of a three-part investigative series on convicted two-time Highland County murdered Michael Fogt. After the bodies of his former wife and an acquaintance were discovered in Hillsboro in 2005, Fogt’s involvement in other local crimes was called into question. His...

www.timesgazette.com

Oblio · 2025-03-18T16:53:54-0400

Seananigans said:
The men voted for Trump, the women were libshits, the men got tired of being yelled at histrionically for destroying democracy?

That's seriously wild that two of you guys have close contacts who both murdered their wives of 50 years though.

22 years this July for us "Whooooaaaa oooohhhhh we're halfway there, Whooooaaaa oooohhhhh livin'..."

stupidmonkey · 2025-03-18T18:22:14-0400

BrutulTM said:
So did these dudes try to make it look like an accident or something? Or did they just turn themselves in and go "I did it, take me to prison"?

Guy I know called the cops and told them he did it and to come get him.

Cad · 2025-03-18T20:22:34-0400

Captain Suave said:
Best piece of relationship advice my dad ever gave me:

Take a good, sober look at your partner. Think of all the things that annoy you, or you wish were different. Can you put up with this FOREVER in exchange for the parts of them you love? Every. Fucking. Day. FOREVER?? If yes, great! If no, GTFO and don't waste everyone's time.

People don't change with age; they distill.

Having known someone since she was 16 and being with her most of the day every day for 30+ years, this is bullshit, people absolutely do change. Sometimes they change for the better and sometimes worse (sometimes both) but people grow up and mature a lot. Some of that maturation happens late in life.

The key to relationships is to be adaptable and have a desire to grow together and work together - there's no magic sauce, you just have to want to do it and so do they.

Oblio · 2025-03-18T21:27:08-0400

Cad said:
Having known someone since she was 16 and being with her most of the day every day for 30+ years, this is bullshit, people absolutely do change. Sometimes they change for the better and sometimes worse (sometimes both) but people grow up and mature a lot. Some of that maturation happens late in life.

The key to relationships is to be adaptable and have a desire to grow together and work together - there's no magic sauce, you just have to want to do it and so do they.

True, it is work. But when you got the right person the work isn't that hard.

That said, the shit that my wife did that annoyed me 20+ years ago still annoys me. Every time I over think that and get mad, I say well she deals with my shit too. I am far from perfect and she is far from perfect. There is no perfect, there is only an equal willingness to put in the work. As lame as it may sound, we are ride or die.

Captain Suave · 2025-03-18T22:22:12-0400

Cad said:
Having known someone since she was 16 and being with her most of the day every day for 30+ years, this is bullshit, people absolutely do change. Sometimes they change for the better and sometimes worse (sometimes both) but people grow up and mature a lot. Some of that maturation happens late in life.

The key to relationships is to be adaptable and have a desire to grow together and work together - there's no magic sauce, you just have to want to do it and so do they.

What I meant was in retrospect, the elements of someone's personality that come to the forefront with time are almost always present earlier in their life to one degree or another. The changes people undergo are mostly a question of mix an emphasis. IMO it's very rare that you look at how someone turns out and go "WTF?? Where did THAT come from?" (Obviously nothing is absolute and that does sometimes happen.)

Palum · 2025-03-18T22:30:30-0400

Captain Suave said:
What I meant was in retrospect, the elements of someone's personality that come to the forefront with time are almost always present earlier in their life to one degree or another. The changes people undergo are mostly a question of mix an emphasis. IMO it's very rare that you look at how someone turns out and go "WTF?? Where did THAT come from?" (Obviously nothing is absolute and that does sometimes happen.)

I dunno man, my experience is that it's the exact opposite. That people change a lot and that change is based primarily on circumstance and only informed by their personality. I've seen too many people change too much to really give much consideration to this type of Freudian analysis. The 'familiarity' component is you filling it in after the fact "oh yea I remember that one time he was rude to the waitress, guess he would murder a woman."

Captain Suave · 2025-03-18T22:36:01-0400

Dunno. I've been married for 20 years and have 40+ year old friendships. I've known exactly one person who I would say changed radically, and they had drug-induced psychosis. YMMV.

Chanur · 2025-03-19T01:21:30-0400

Daidraco said:
After 50 years of marriage, I always figured it would look more like Geralds Game. One of them just dead on top of the other from a fucking stroke. Your significant other killing you in your sleep is some brutal ass shit. In your 70's at the least. Like fuckin hell - what is even the point of killing your SO at that age. What, did she wobble, fall, land on some dudes blue chew dick?

Cad · 2025-03-19T09:14:41-0400

Captain Suave said:
What I meant was in retrospect, the elements of someone's personality that come to the forefront with time are almost always present earlier in their life to one degree or another. The changes people undergo are mostly a question of mix an emphasis. IMO it's very rare that you look at how someone turns out and go "WTF?? Where did THAT come from?" (Obviously nothing is absolute and that does sometimes happen.)

I can certainly agree with that. Personality doesn't really change, but how it is expressed does. Some people grow up and learn to control the bad facets of their personality, some grow up and stop giving a fuck and the bad facets of their personality take over. But those facets of their personality were always there.

Prodigal · 2025-03-19T10:51:43-0400

Oblio said:
True, it is work. But when you got the right person the work isn't that hard.

That said, the shit that my wife did that annoyed me 20+ years ago still annoys me. Every time I over think that and get mad, I say well she deals with my shit too. I am far from perfect and she is far from perfect. There is no perfect, there is only an equal willingness to put in the work. As lame as it may sound, we are ride or die.

This is pretty much where wife and I are (married 32 years this August). I’ve bitched here before about stuff she did, but still love her and realize just how lucky we are even compared to other couples we know married a similar length of time.

Related:

Tarrant · 2025-03-19T15:45:18-0400

While murders and work is being talked about, I had a woman (customer) shoot an ex and kill him while they were both 3feet from me.

That was a fun Friday night.

Palum · 2025-03-19T16:29:55-0400

Tarrant said:
While murders and work is being talked about, I had a woman (customer) shoot an ex and kill him while they were both 3feet from me.

That was a fun Friday night.

Hey man it happens

Kithani · 2025-03-19T17:16:16-0400

Tarrant said:
While murders and work is being talked about, I had a woman (customer) shoot an ex and kill him while they were both 3feet from me.

That was a fun Friday night.

So I take it you worked at Waffle House?Yup, we’ve all been there dude

Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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