Marriage and the Power of Divorce
- Thread starter Grumpus
- Start date
-
Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
She's done riding the dick train and you're the beta provider. Disregard your feelings; break up with her and die alone.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
Talked about abortion this weekend. This was actually a little disheartening to me. She believes strongly in the rhythm method. She was trying to talk me into cumming in her because she just had her period.
"Yea that's not happening, you can still get pregnant"
"Then I'll just have an abortion"
"How can you be so flippant about abortion? Regardless of political viewpoints, it does things to your body, and it's not a pleasant process"
"I've already had two medical abortions, as long as it's a medical abortion it doesn't have any lasting effects"
This was the first time I seriously questioned her sanity, and it was quite off putting. The two previous abortions were during failed rhythm method experiments with previous boyfriends. She had an IUD and it caused complications two weeks ago so she isn't currently on any BC because she had to have it removed. She is getting a new IUD next week. I honestly couldn't believe the words that were coming out of her mouth in regard to the entire situation.
We haven't taken a long road trip yet, but we've spent entire weekends with each other which ends up being long road trips for both of us because of the distance.
I met her mother and her sister and brother in law + their kid last weekend. I've also met a few of her friends and she met some of mine this weekend.
She swallows. I've only ever been with one woman who didn't swallow though so, that's not exactly surprising to me.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
Last month. He is an alcoholic. Her mother and he divorced when she was very young.
Doesn't having an abortion make you more likely to miscarry later on or something? I know just casually getting abortions as birth control is not a smart approach.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
That's what I've heard. I've also heard it makes it harder to conceive in the first place. I haven't looked into it because I've never cared enough to nor have I ever gotten a woman pregnant.
I'm surprised she keeps contact with him. My wife is in a similar situation where her father was an alcoholic and her mom divorced him when she was fairly young. She basically acts like he doesn't exist and that her step dad (who her mom and step dad got married when she was either in late HS or college) is basically her actual dad. Even to this day I'm somewhat nervous to bring it up and get the full story because she clearly has no desire to talk about her father.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
She's a very open and honest individual. She maintains the relationship because he's a very passive, non aggressive drunk. He made a lot of money, bought an RV, and lives in it travelling across the US. So while he's an alcoholic, he's not an abusive, worthless alcoholic. He's still a functional human being, which is why I believe she is still in contact with him. Also, based on other events in her past she seems to be the type of person who uses her experiences to gain insight and as a tool to keep herself aware of how addicts act so she can separate her emotions from her rationality and make informed decisions. Which is why I was a little dumbfounded by her view on abortion.
Frenzied Wombat
Potato del Grande
- 14,730
- 31,803
It sounds like she views an abortion as birth control, particularly since she's already had two. And what the fuck does a "medical abortion" mean, that it wasn't conducted with a coat hanger in a back alley?
The crazy sex, emotional apathy concerning abortion, and the daddy leaving early + alcohol issues is making my CrayDar go off. Ask religious people just how well the rhythm method works.. Please bag it or make sure she goes on the pill and don't allow her stance on abortion to placate you. She could get knocked up and decide you're the best daddy she can get and suddenly her abortion stance could conveniently flip.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
Well no shit. But we shall see.
Daddy didn't leave early. Daddy and Mommy had a mutual, amicable split. Daddy was independently wealthy and mommy is a vice president for one of the branches of Kaiser Permanente. There was no alimony and no child support. No custody battles and no ill will. Her mother is a very impressive woman. I met her and had a few good conversations with her + daughter. Her mother thinks and acts like a man. Dad helped and stayed in touch even though there was no court order to do so.
I am not blind to all of these things. But plenty of people overcome adversity and are better people for it, so while I really am in love, I've never been the kind of person who let's that blind me and I am just moving forward with it and letting the chips fall where they may. I refuse to be bitter, jaded and act as if I'm clairvoyant or omnipotent. Every person on earth has a past.
Daddy didn't leave early. Daddy and Mommy had a mutual, amicable split. Daddy was independently wealthy and mommy is a vice president for one of the branches of Kaiser Permanente. There was no alimony and no child support. No custody battles and no ill will. Her mother is a very impressive woman. I met her and had a few good conversations with her + daughter. Her mother thinks and acts like a man. Dad helped and stayed in touch even though there was no court order to do so.
I am not blind to all of these things. But plenty of people overcome adversity and are better people for it, so while I really am in love, I've never been the kind of person who let's that blind me and I am just moving forward with it and letting the chips fall where they may. I refuse to be bitter, jaded and act as if I'm clairvoyant or omnipotent. Every person on earth has a past.
Gravy
Bronze Squire
- 4,918
- 454
Yeah, that kind of sucks. This will have to be talked about again if you are in love. To me it just sounds like you two have to spend more time together and work through some of that shit. If she's sane, it won't be a big deal.
Seems like you are on top of things, just make sure your dick isn't fooling you.
Frenzied Wombat
Potato del Grande
- 14,730
- 31,803
Sorry if it felt that I was stating the obvious-- just making sure that the love blinders aren't so strong that they're blotting out all reason. We've all been there bro.
Mures
Blackwing Lair Raider
- 4,014
- 511
In her defense I'm sure she doesn't WANT to go through another abortion, she was just saying that because she wanted the d and because she knew she wouldn't get pregnant. Many people are able to use the rhythm method to success. If she has regular periods and her period just ended there is no way she is getting pregnant. Khane may not be able to verify if the period just ended though if the relationship is semi-long distance.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
- 20,346
- 14,012
We talked about it at length. It's one of the things I like about her. Never once has she shyed away from a conversation or got confrontational when I've disagreed with her. Nor does she try to change the subject or shut the conversation down. Essentially what happened was she admitted that what she was saying was crazy and understands exactly why I don't want to have unprotected sex, especially while she's off birth control. "I just love how it feels and am a little drunk right now so I don't have a filter and am throwing reason to the wayside". It was a 30-45 minute discussion. I still didn't like her attitude regarding abortion and I let her know it.
I asked her why she wasn't on birth control with her past boyfriends and she mentioned because she tried a variety and they gave her debilitating cramps and headaches. As soon as IUD's became available and were vetted she got one. I asked her how she could be so casual about abortion, she asked me if I was pro-life. When I told her no, I just don't like your attitude and am starting to feel as though you don't weigh consequences I expected her to flip out. She didn't. She just said "part of it was just that, I was young and knew I didn't want kids so abortion didn't seem like a big deal to me. And right now I'm just being a little emotional because I want to feel you cum inside me", which was a satisfactory answer.