Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Selix_sl said:

Well time to go full blown secure mode. Just found my wife's conversation with her new boyfriend and shes already talking to an attorney. Apparently this "separation" she convinced me we are doing is just smoke and mirrors.

Click to expand...

Sell everything. Buy bars of gold. Go to the woods. Bury previously purchased gold. Resist urge to bury anything or anyone else. Declare bankruptcy. File for divorce. Divorce. Dig up gold. Move to 3rd world and live like an Arab king !

Can't say I blame her for being pissed. People who expect someone else to take care of them when they are perfectly capable of taking care of themselves really rustle my jimmies. He needs spousal support from a secretary. Tell him to get a fucking landscaping job or something. Deadbeat.

stupidmonkey_sl said:

This thread needs more Onoes drama and forehead kisses... lots and lots of forehead kisses, bitches love those.

Click to expand...

I had something happen last weekend, but it's fucking embarrassing, so I didn't plan on talking about it. In my shortest post ever, it went something like this.

Me + Saturday night out + alcohol + running into the girl who just dumped me that I can't seem to get over = me embarrassingly and loudly confronting her on the street with a bunch of people around. Not in an aggressive way, in a sad, begging, WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!?! way.

It was pretty fucking terrible, and I woke up Sunday morning going "I know that happened, but I sure hope that was just a bad dream, please let that have been a bad dream."

It wasn't, and really made me feel like I was retarded. On a bright note, I spent the day really looking at myself, and wondering how I turned into the crazy girl in the situation. I think I hit rock bottom as far as how this was affecting me, and I decided to stop it. The last 4 days have been much easier, I feel way more in control of my actions and emotions, and while I still wish things had worked out differently, I've now fully accepted that its done and I need to move on. It's kind of nuts how a switch in your head can just flip and make you go "Wow, you're being crazy, stop." and you just do, and start feeling much better right away.

Anyway, it was stupid, I've never done anything like that before, but on the other hand, I feel like I've now said everything I wanted to, and kind of have some closure or something. I'm already as embarrassed as I can be about this.

I share way to much with you monsters.

Onoes_sl said:

I had something happen last weekend, but it's fucking embarrassing, so I didn't plan on talking about it. In my shortest post ever, it went something like this.

Me + Saturday night out + alcohol + running into the girl who just dumped me that I can't seem to get over = me embarrassingly and loudly confronting her on the street with a bunch of people around. Not in an aggressive way, in a sad, begging, WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!?! way.

It was pretty fucking terrible, and I woke up Sunday morning going "I know that happened, but I sure hope that was just a bad dream, please let that have been a bad dream."

It wasn't, and really made me feel like I was retarded. On a bright note, I spent the day really looking at myself, and wondering how I turned into the crazy girl in the situation. I think I hit rock bottom as far as how this was affecting me, and I decided to stop it. The last 4 days have been much easier, I feel way more in control of my actions and emotions, and while I still wish things had worked out differently, I've now fully accepted that its done and I need to move on. It's kind of nuts how a switch in your head can just flip and make you go "Wow, you're being crazy, stop." and you just do, and start feeling much better right away.

Anyway, it was stupid, I've never done anything like that before, but on the other hand, I feel like I've now said everything I wanted to, and kind of have some closure or something. I'm already as embarrassed as I can be about this.

I share way to much with you monsters.

Click to expand...

Get a haircut you fucking hippie

Its cathartic man. Cause you know we really don't care what you do. So you're getting stuff you want off your chest in a way that doesn't impact your everyday life. We're like the priest in a confessional, except without the penance. Shave off the damn horns though.

Onoes_sl said:

I had something happen last weekend, but it's fucking embarrassing, so I didn't plan on talking about it. In my shortest post ever, it went something like this.

Me + Saturday night out + alcohol + running into the girl who just dumped me that I can't seem to get over = me embarrassingly and loudly confronting her on the street with a bunch of people around. Not in an aggressive way, in a sad, begging, WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!?! way.

It was pretty fucking terrible, and I woke up Sunday morning going "I know that happened, but I sure hope that was just a bad dream, please let that have been a bad dream."

It wasn't, and really made me feel like I was retarded. On a bright note, I spent the day really looking at myself, and wondering how I turned into the crazy girl in the situation. I think I hit rock bottom as far as how this was affecting me, and I decided to stop it. The last 4 days have been much easier, I feel way more in control of my actions and emotions, and while I still wish things had worked out differently, I've now fully accepted that its done and I need to move on. It's kind of nuts how a switch in your head can just flip and make you go "Wow, you're being crazy, stop." and you just do, and start feeling much better right away.

Anyway, it was stupid, I've never done anything like that before, but on the other hand, I feel like I've now said everything I wanted to, and kind of have some closure or something. I'm already as embarrassed as I can be about this.

I share way to much with you monsters.

Click to expand...

Aww, that's beautiful. You went all drunk and nuts on an ex!

I've done the Swingers answering machine call before.

Oh god, so embarrassing.

Good times. Good times.

The horns stay

Actually, last night a friend invited me out for a drink, he had just finished practicing with his band and thought I might like to go (because the lead singer of his band is a guy who was in another band I was really into in high school, he thought I might like to meet him). So I went and hung out with them last night, had a great time, and their guitarist made a comment about how I looked cool as fuck, and I should come up to Vegas with them this weekend, and one of the other guys laughed and said "Well, he would definitely draw people to our merch booth.", and I went "Yeah, I've got no plans, I'll hang at your booth, sounds fun."

Well, after some more talking, it turned out that one of their members is headed to Japan for a tour with his other band next month, I guess he goes about every year, and he's setting this band up for a Japan tour later this year. So, if I want to, I've been invited on what is likely to be a two week, all expense paid tour of Japan with a band.

I know you are all very excited to have me cut the horns off and... I don't know? Not have stories because I stop going out and meeting people because I'm constantly upset by the failed attempts to connect with another human being? In the first 6 months after my wife left, before I had the hair, how many times did I go out hoping to meet people? I'd wager, somewhere near 50-60 times. Never made a connection with anyone. The one girl who I did hook up with was a girl from high school who found me on facebook and had apparently held a crush.

Now, from the time I started doing my hair? 5 girls, within another 6 months. I didn't start going out more, in fact, I'm probably going out less, and none of these girls have been as crazy as the first girl BEFORE I had the hair.

But yeah, I really, REALLY enjoy them. I know we've done this a bunch of times before, but it really is night and day. When I go out with a hat on, I talk to my little circle of friends, have an ok night, come home and feel bummed out that no one gave me a second look all night. Going out last night? I don't think there was a person in the wine bar I didn't talk to. Probably 30 people, at one point or another. It's fucking crazy, and I come home feeling really good about the whole thing. I imagine its similar to someone being in crazy good shape and going out in a sleeveless tight shirt or something. I understand it's superficial... but why should I care when I'm having fun? And thats really it I guess, it's just fun. If I needed to shave my head and take out my piercings tomorrow for work or something, I would do it, it would be done in 10 minutes. It's not that big a deal. But when it's "A bunch of guys on a forum I hang out on want me to cut my hair vs. the constant positive attention and reinforcement I recieve everywhere else" there's no real motivation there.

Imagine you had a favorite sweater, and every time you wore it out people approached you to compliment you or talk about your awesome sweater. Then you came on here and posted a picture of the sweater, and we all went "Burn that fucking sweater". Even if you understood why, and totally saw where we were coming from (Which I feel I do, I'm completely aware of the ridiculousness of my hair), why would you take that advice? Ehhh, thats the best way I can think to explain it.

Iannis_sl said:

Aww, that's beautiful. You went all drunk and nuts on an ex!

I've done the Swingers answering machine call before.

Oh god, so embarrassing.

Good times. Good times.

Click to expand...

Yeah, the feeling you get watching that is pretty much what I woke up with, lol.

I had sent her a text the next day apologizing and assuring her it wouldn't happen again. I just sent the one text (Although you know me, it was a long text), and she didn't respond. She randomly text me tonight saying "Hey Mikel, don't worry. I didn't take it as bad as you think.... I understand what happened the other night, I've seen and talked to many drunk ppl in my life and I have been that person myself. You're forgiven and I'm glad it opened your eyes to things. I'll see you around I know I will because we go to the same places. We're both happy ppl so this will all work out. No worries."

I just replied with "Thanks, have a great night." I don't expect I will be talking to her again, other than a polite "hello" if I see her out on the town. Feels good though, some kind of closure I guess.

FUCK IT I'M GROWING HORNS TOO #ohnoesstrong

Onoes_sl said:

It's not that big a deal.

Click to expand...

Aren't you the guy who let his wife take care of the stripper/ex-con shakedown over a used car? I can't imagine why you would want to wear a costume all the time??????

Not to get ultra personal here, but almost every story you write begins with "I went out for a drink".

How often do you drink?

Guy in early 30s (?), drinks all the time, insists ridiculously flamboyant hair-cut is necessary.

You're exactly like the guy that wears nothing but wolf t-shirts and insists its "his thing". The dumbass horns haircut is your reluctance to integrate into actual well-dressed and groomed society, because then people will actually judge you against other attractive men and you'll actually lose and have to get better at it. Right now you're a non-compete.

If I wore nothing but mustard-stained wife-beaters, no one would expect too much of me either.

And for the record, I'm no Tenks. My wife is slowly yet steadily helping me learn how to actually dress like a man with a modicum of fashion sense. I spent my 20s either too poor to care or on a military base. It's tempting to just wear mediocre jeans and a hoody everywhere but that isn't exciting/challenging/fun nor does it lead to self-improvement.