Aren't you the guy who let his wife take care of the stripper/ex-con shakedown over a used car? I can't imagine why you would want to wear a costume all the time??????
If by "let" you mean "her and her sister went and made the exchange without my knowledge while I was at work" then yeah, that was me. She had suggested it, and I was firmly against the idea. When she went, the stripper showed up in a car full of guys. I highly suspect I would have been killed, or at least spent time in a hospital, if I had been there, which is why I was against it. My ex-wife called the lady and told her she was a friend of mine who heard about it and wanted to help me out. So yeah, that happened, but I didn't orchestrate it.
Onoes seems like the obnoxious person who never shuts the fuck up that I try to avoid at all costs.
You on the other hand seem like a treasure, and no doubt a joy to be around.
Not to get ultra personal here, but almost every story you write begins with "I went out for a drink".
How often do you drink?
One to two nights a week. Typically I go out Saturday night, but every other week I don't have my kids on Thursday, so sometimes I go out that night as well. As far as every story starting that way... yeah? I mean... I really don't even know how else it would start? Where else do you go to meet new people? Friday nights I play D&D with a group of friends, no stories of any interest to this forum come from that. Sunday's I typically host Board games at my house, again, it's pretty much always the same pool of people coming to those. Probably once a month I take a trip out of town to either Prescott, Phoenix, of San Diego to visit friends. Mon-Thursday I get back to town from work about 7pm, and usually I'm either taking care of my children, or handling the stuff I need to get done during the week (laundry, cleaning, shopping, etc.)
So yeah, pretty much all of my stories that involve meeting people or sex are going to start with "I went to some location where there was alcohol".
Guy in early 30s (?), drinks all the time, insists ridiculously flamboyant hair-cut is necessary.
You're exactly like the guy that wears nothing but wolf t-shirts and insists its "his thing". The dumbass horns haircut is your reluctance to integrate into actual well-dressed and groomed society, because then people will actually judge you against other attractive men and you'll actually lose and have to get better at it. Right now you're a non-compete.
If I wore nothing but mustard-stained wife-beaters, no one would expect too much of me either.
I'm 35 now, don't drink that much, and I just think my haircut is fun/attracts attention. I've been a member of well dressed society for the last 10 years, didn't much care for it. And yes, you're right on the "If I looked like everyone else I would have to compete on that level" thing, I agree, and I'm not much interested in competing with yoga guy, or throws all his money around guy, or even just good looking guy. I'm fine being different guy, as I've said before, I typically have no problem dealing with people once conversation has been initiated, I'm charming and likeable (outside of this forum apparently), my issue is that initial contact. When I'm just another face in the crowd, competing against other people, I lose confidence, and I'm sure that shows, and then I get depressed about it. When I'm in costume as it were, I walk in like I own the place, I know I look ridiculous, and maybe that's part of the appeal for me. I don't know, I just know that I feel good about it, I have fun, and I'm happy.
Also your analogy is bad. Mustard stained wifebeater's and people not expecting much of you? A better analogy would have been "If I wore an elaborate costume everywhere I went people would talk to me too, doesn't mean I'm worth talking to" or something along those lines. Assuming you were trying to be accurate and insulting. I don't belive I look like shit and give people the impression I just rolled out of bed like your analogy would suggest.
When I see a chick at a bar who is all dolled up and wearing some skimpy dress, all systems in my body are in full agreement and I think of how awesome it would be to bang her. The next thought I have is " she would probably be an absolute nightmare to date." On the other hand, when I see an attractive girl but one with less makeup and not wearing a dress that is pushes all my evolutionary buttons, she doesn't draw my attention as quickly, but when I consider her I think she might have potential.
I'm not interested in the dolled up girl (to be clear, she isn't in me either, but that's not the point) because if she needs all that attention from strangers at a bar, she's probably either narcissistic or incredibly shallow.
You are the dolled up girl. YES you clearly get more attention and have more fun. So does the dolled up girl. But she's also dating bros or dudes with tons of money who will eventually cheat on her with a younger version of herself because she has publicly tied her worth to her looks. I feel sorry for those girls because they're doomed. It's the grounded girl who stands out less that has a far better chance of creating a meaningful relationship.
You've been told this explanation 100 different ways. Your claim that you mey crazier girls without the horns is either bullshit, a consequemce of the fact that you were probably crazier yourself, mentally, that close to your divorce, or random
Now that's a spot on analogy! And while I'm sure there are woman who would be a delight to date, who have taken one look at me and thought "Not dating material", there have also been lots who have approached me. The biggest thing I hear is besides "is that really your hair? How long does that take? What do you use?" is "You're not at all how I was expecting you to be." Stuff along those lines. In a positive way. I'm very personable. I've basically made my entire career not knowing what I'm doing, but just by being the guy that everyone likes all the time.
So, while your analogy is fundamentally true, the amount of people I convert to "Ohh what a cool guy." once we meet, is so much higher than the amount of people who ever give me a chance outside of pretty girl costume. So, it stays a win-win for me.
Onoes, I think you might be gay.
I'm not even trolling. Think about it.
Never been at all interested in men, no. I don't even have all that many male friends, as I tend not to have much in common with them, and so they end up not having much to offer me in terms of "why would I rather be hanging out with you vs anything else right now?".
That being said, I'm definitely not manly in any way shape or form. I don't like or understand sports, I'm not into cars, I don't even know what guys are into past that, hunting maybe? My male friends are dudes who want to go to comiccon. Basically, if you aren't into nerdy shit, I have very little to talk to you about, and I don't want to have sex with you, so I probably don't hang out with you. I rarely have much of anything in common with women either, but I do want to have sex with them, and so can be perfectly entertained listening to her talk about horses or whatever for 4 hours.
So yeah, while I'm not a macho guy by any imagination, I think the fact that I have almost no desire to spend time with men, and a stupid overwhelming desire to spend time with woman, pretty much rules me out of the gay club. Sorry Itlan, but you'll find the guy for you, it's just not me. <3 XOXO
It's really kind of sad how much the attention of others matters to you Onoes.
Yeah? I guess. It's not an intentional choice, its just how I am. I tend not to focus on the sad aspects, I'm a glass half full kind of guy, I choose to be happy about how great all that attention feels vs. the depressing feeling of not having it. But fair point. We all have our issue's.
