Marriage and the Power of Divorce

  • Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!



    Go here and give us your nominations!
    Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!

Joeboo

Molten Core Raider
8,157
140
My wife is completely dump-oblivious. I'd be doing my business and she'll just open the door and walk into the bathroom to get something. I'm not really a big fan of that at all, so I quickly learned to lock the damn door when I'm taking a dump. The whole thing is just gross. I don't want to see someone else pooping, and I don't want to be seen while pooping. I want my 10 minutes of solitude damnit.
 

mkopec

<Gold Donor>
26,700
40,954
Yeah I agreee joeboo. Im all into intimacy and all that just leave #2 out of it. Something definitely awkward about someone standing there while you try to squeeze one out.
 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,472
16,417
My wife is completely dump-oblivious. I'd be doing my business and she'll just open the door and walk into the bathroom to get something. I'm not really a big fan of that at all, so I quickly learned to lock the damn door when I'm taking a dump. The whole thing is just gross. I don't want to see someone else pooping, and I don't want to be seen while pooping. I want my 10 minutes of solitude damnit.
Yep, exactly. My wife kept doing the same thing. She would say "What? We're married", yeah so what I don't want someone in here while I'm pushing turds out. Now she always walks into the door trying to open it and goes "Why do you always lock the door now?"
 

iannis

Musty Nester
31,351
17,659
Well I mean think about it.

We bust in their guts. Watching us take a shit is actually a little bit less gross than that.
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
20,738
14,505
Well I mean think about it.

We bust in their guts.
But women love that. Every woman I know likes it. It also has the added benefit (for them anyway) that I'm not blinding them by busting in their eye or gumming up their hair.

Plus that's just the miracle of life man. Nothing miraculous about taking a shit.
 

Deathwing

<Bronze Donator>
17,062
8,067
Gonna say it again, bunch of prudes in this thread. Grow up, guys. Are you afraid the cooties are going to enter your body via your puckered anus?
 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,472
16,417
Just a personal thing bro.

One day she asked if she could watch me piss as she had never seen a man piss. She sat there and watched piss come out of my dick and into the toilet. It was fucking weird.
 

Deathwing

<Bronze Donator>
17,062
8,067
Your wife wanted to watch you piss and you got stuck at "ugh!"? Think of the implications of her just even asking that question.
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
20,738
14,505
"You want to watch me piss? Lie on your back. I'll shower you with more than love"

We may be prudes but you've got some crazy shit cookin' in that head of yours.
 

Deathwing

<Bronze Donator>
17,062
8,067
What does the crazy shit in my head have to do with anything? Sounds like Noodle's wife is open to suggestion and instead he locks the door.
 

Deathwing

<Bronze Donator>
17,062
8,067
I'm not into water works my friend. I didn't marry a human toilet, but I guess I missed the invitation.
You're just not getting it. Don't focus on the specific kink. Focus on that she brought it up at all. It might mean she's open to other stuff, stuff you might like. People are more fucked up than you think, yourself included. They just need a little help easing into it. But if you shut the door on something pretty simple like watching you pee, or locking the door when you shit, she might perceive that as a reason to not be as open with you, even if you don't view those things sexually.