Parent Thread

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OU Ariakas

OU Ariakas

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opiate82_sl said:
Before my daughter was born I always figured that the first few months would be incredibly boring and I would enjoy parenthood a lot more once she grew up a bit and was more interactive.

After reading some parenting books that go into the development and bonding that happens early on I made sure I was set up so I basically didn't have to work for the first 3 months and I am very grateful I did.

You won't ruin your kid if you can't take a bunch of paternity right when they are born, but if you can afford it and your job allows for it I'd recommend taking full advantage.

It is worth pointing out I basically work from home so I still get a bunch of time with my daughter even now, but if I did have to go into an office, now that I experienced having that time off, I would prioritize taking my PTO for right after my kid was born rather than putting it off till they were a bit older.
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Yea, all my guy friends told me that the first few months were boring because they didn't really do anything; but I took all 3 months of my Parental leave and then another of PTO because they were twins and my wife would need the help. The bond I created with them in those few months is EXTREMELY evident now and I wouldn't take that time back for anything. I found them to be different right off the bat and those differences have been getting more pronounced as they get older (6 months old today).

Also, Cad is correct about the nanny/au pair. They are worth every damn penny since they focus solely on your children and know more than you do about early child development. Hell, our au pair only had experience with one other small infant and she is still the one pushing the envelope with them to sit, crawl, eat solids, etc.
 
Noodleface

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Also some dads just aren't really good dads. As much as the first month was really shitty, I wouldn't have traded it for anything.

Case in point: My wife's cousin. She has a husband that's a real dick - the frat boy type, even though he's like 35. He's some hotshot manager at some company in Boston so he makes good money. As soon as the kid was born he went back to work, telling us that his wife could handle all the "gross stuff." Why have a kid? The kid relies on you to take care of him and bring him up - not just a show piece to friends and family. I have a feeling he'll be a shitty dad.
 
Cad

Cad

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Also some dads just aren't really good dads. As much as the first month was really shitty, I wouldn't have traded it for anything.

Case in point: My wife's cousin. She has a husband that's a real dick - the frat boy type, even though he's like 35. He's some hotshot manager at some company in Boston so he makes good money. As soon as the kid was born he went back to work, telling us that his wife could handle all the "gross stuff." Why have a kid? The kid relies on you to take care of him and bring him up - not just a show piece to friends and family. I have a feeling he'll be a shitty dad.
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Yea when my kids were born I took two weeks off, but then went back to work. I would rush home and spend hours just holding their little silly asses since they don't do anything when they are infants. But just watching them look at you is amazing. Even when its your third kid.

Some people just don't get that tingle from their kids... I do, I love the little shits.
 
Tuco

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My kid's first multi-word phrase is "Got em".




(Disclaimer, he doesn't say deez nuts and we don't want him to, but it'd be pretty hard not to laugh if he did).
 
Ao-

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Tuco_sl said:
(Disclaimer, he doesn't say deez nuts and we don't want him to, but it'd be pretty hard not to laugh if he did).
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My wife was critiquing my driving with "Try not to hit those potholes" and my soon-to-be-3yo son yells from the back "Mom! We don't say butthole!".
I cried from stifling my laughter the mile drive home.
 
moontayle

moontayle

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Cad_sl said:
Yea when my kids were born I took two weeks off, but then went back to work. I would rush home and spend hours just holding their little silly asses since they don't do anything when they are infants. But just watching them look at you is amazing. Even when its your third kid.

Some people just don't get that tingle from their kids... I do, I love the little shits.
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I took as much time as I could afford to for both my kids and the rotating schedule I was on at the time means I was able to get a lot of time in during their first couple of years. I have a bunch of pictures of me and them, just holding them or sleeping with them. I feel it made a huge difference early on and even now. I still spend time with them every day, and bedtime reading is a sacred ritual that is only broken in the most dire of situations.
 
Ronaan

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Also some dads just aren't really good dads. As much as the first month was really shitty, I wouldn't have traded it for anything.

Case in point: My wife's cousin. She has a husband that's a real dick - the frat boy type, even though he's like 35. He's some hotshot manager at some company in Boston so he makes good money. As soon as the kid was born he went back to work, telling us that his wife could handle all the "gross stuff." Why have a kid? The kid relies on you to take care of him and bring him up - not just a show piece to friends and family. I have a feeling he'll be a shitty dad.
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I'm a big softie. I'd stay at home full time if we could afford it, just to be with my girls.
When I get home from work, every minute is spent with my kids up until they go to bed.

I don't get people like that.
 
Ao-

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Tred_sl said:
Well I am now the father of a 1 year old. Holy shit! lol
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It gets more different. I was gonna say better but the first year isn't the worst. Congrats, as long as your kid isn't a stripper/escort/junkie, you've won!
 
radditsu

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My Youngest's 2nd Birthday today. It is so much easier after the first two years. Although he did wrestle with his 4 year old brother since 3 am last night.
 
Woefully Inept

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Happy Birthday to your little man radditsu! And a preemptive one for yours too Noodle.


New born vs. 1 year old. It is exciting now that he's more than a blob of flesh with arms and legs that does more than drool and poop. He's walking more than he's crawling now and he's made attempts with varying degrees of success at running now too.

rrr_img_130642.jpg


I've been reading the politisteak and eggs thread too much because I subconsciously made him (shaved)steak and eggs for breakfast. Devoured that shit with the quickness.
 
Noodleface

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At 1 year wife is convinced son is autistic. I'm losing my fucking mind reassuring her. Today I didn't even want to come home from work... She was crying on the phone....

Bros, what did i do wrong
 
lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Noodlemod_sl said:
At 1 year wife is convinced son is autistic. I'm losing my fucking mind reassuring her. Today I didn't even want to come home from work... She was crying on the phone....

Bros, what did i do wrong
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Keep reassuring her. That shit is so easy to obsess about. Might appear crazy to you, seems perfectly reasonable to her. Patience, man.

Also, a hitachi wand vibrator.
 
Arative

Arative

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Noodlemod_sl said:
At 1 year wife is convinced son is autistic. I'm losing my fucking mind reassuring her. Today I didn't even want to come home from work... She was crying on the phone....

Bros, what did i do wrong
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There is an app called the wonder weeks, sort of tells you what to expect in child development. But you are not alone, my kid today was lining up some toy trucks and moving them from spot to spot around the room . he would get pissed off if they weren't in some order that only he knew and my wife was like I'm worried he has some sort of ocd spectrum.
 
Noodleface

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Monday I talked her down and told her rather than focusing on what hes not doing, focus on what he is doing. Crawling like a maniac, trying to walk, sharing toys, giving high fives, smiling when we talk to him, being the man in general.

We were good for a day then today it all went to shit again. He's got an eye issue and I'm sending her to the doctor half as that and half to just have the doctor quell her fears.
 
Arative

Arative

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Monday I talked her down and told her rather than focusing on what hes not doing, focus on what he is doing. Crawling like a maniac, trying to walk, sharing toys, giving high fives, smiling when we talk to him, being the man in general.

We were good for a day then today it all went to shit again. He's got an eye issue and I'm sending her to the doctor half as that and half to just have the doctor quell her fears.
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Doesn't sound like he's spectrum to me. Women be crazy. My kid used to cry when he heard loud noises and was outside and my wife thought he had a sensory issue.
 
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