Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015)

  • Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!



    Go here and give us your nominations!
    Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!

Seananigans

Honorary Shit-PhD
<Gold Donor>
13,700
34,218
Yes, parsec is a measure of distance, but you lost me with the rest. They're speaking english and using all of our Earthican terms. But parsec is RIGHT FUCKING OUT unless Earth exists in SW universe?

K.
 

Fadaar

That guy
10,936
11,956
Considering the whole formula is based on the distance from our earth to the sun... yes. I know it's a stupid nitpick, but I hate my supervisor forever for imparting that knowledge on me.
 

radditsu

Silver Knight of the Realm
4,676
826
Ehh here is a nerd explaination: hyperspace speed is a constant and he found a lane that covers kessel space in that distance?


All i remember bout kessel is the shit pvp space zone in SWG.

But the real reason is lucas has always had dialogue issues.
 

Xevy

Log Wizard
8,888
4,105
*adjusts glasses with fingers*

Well, you see, the Kessel run took place between several strong gravitational bodies (black holes or stars, I don't remember), so to make it in a shorter distance must mean that the Falcon had incredible speed to negate those gravitational forces.

Basically Interstellarz.
 

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
<Gold Donor>
27,231
15,366
*adjusts glasses with fingers*

Well, you see, the Kessel run took place between several strong gravitational bodies (black holes or stars, I don't remember), so to make it in a shorter distance must mean that the Falcon had incredible speed to negate those gravitational forces.

Basically Interstellarz.
Yes. The maw was an area with a high concentration of black holes. He cut it down to 15 or 12 or whatever parsecs by skirting closer to the maw than anyone else was willing to go. Thing is, that's not so much a brag on the speed of the ship as it is a brag on his piloting ability or maybe the toughness of the ship.
 

Xevy

Log Wizard
8,888
4,105
It's a brag on both as he would need significant acceleration to escape the pull that doomed others. He gets points if he was piloting it for being cocky as fuck and his ship gets points for actually being powerful enough to escape the pull. It's like Bo Jackson pulling his goddamn hip out of his socket because he was so strong when a guy was trying to tackle him. The full weight of the guy was pulling him down but he was so strong his body kept running while his leg stayed behind.

Edit: I just realized I made a sports analogy in a Star Wars thread. Sorry, everybody.
 

Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
43,739
52,293
Ehh here is a nerd explaination: hyperspace speed is a constant and he found a lane that covers kessel space in that distance?


All i remember bout kessel is the shit pvp space zone in SWG.

But the real reason is lucas has always had dialogue issues.
Hyperspeed isn't constant, some hyperdrives are faster than others.
 

Itzena_sl

shitlord
4,609
6
*adjusts glasses with fingers*

Well, you see, the Kessel run took place between several strong gravitational bodies (black holes or stars, I don't remember), so to make it in a shorter distance must mean that the Falcon had incredible speed to negate those gravitational forces.

Basically Interstellarz.
Theoriginalcanon explanation (i.e. from the Star Wars script) was that Han was bullshitting to make himself and the Falcon sound better to Kenobi but Obi-Wan wasn't buying it.
 

j00t

Silver Baronet of the Realm
7,380
7,476
Clearly we all know it's the wrong word. It was a word that, at the time, was unheard of to the general public. Lucas used it because he was in the know enough to have heard it, but not in the know enough to actually know what it means. So now we have people all over the place trying to explain it in a way that makes it a legitimate brag.

The "trying to look cool" reason that's apparently the original canon reason doesn't make any sense either.
Parsec would be a very common term for those characters. Even assuming that the mos eisley regulars wouldn't understand the term (they would, its a spaceport), Han would STILL know that he was basically saying, "I made it from L.A. to Vegas in 50 miles."
 

Itzena_sl

shitlord
4,609
6
He thinks he's trying to impress a couple of whatever the Tatooine equivalent of shitkickers are, though, not actual smugglers/pilots/etc.
 

Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
43,739
52,293
Itzena is right.

In the revised fourth draft of A New Hope in 1976, the description for "Kessel Run" is put as follows:
"It's the ship that made the Kessel run in less than twelve parsecs!"
Ben reacts to Solo's stupid attempt to impress them with obvious misinformation.
So it implies that the puzzling speech of Han Solo is "misinformation" and not truth, and it has nothing to do with the nature of the Kessel Run in any respect. Han means nothing other than impressing Obi-Wan and Luke with pure boasting. Indeed, even in the final version of the script, the parentheses attached to Han's line state that he is "obviously lying."
The EU explanation of distance makes no goddamn sense, in fact, the whole goddamn 'Kessel Run' makes no goddamn sense, because you wouldn't travel 18 parsecs (thats 54 light years) with your sublight engines and you can't negotiate a fucking asteroid field in hyperspace.
 

Gamma Rays

Large sized member
4,005
9,585
Considering that Lucas is the posterboy for ret-conning his own work, you think he would have redone the audio of that in one of his many revisions.

Simply replace parsec with some new made up jibba-jabba word and let us take it as read that it makes sense in their space travel lingo.
 

j00t

Silver Baronet of the Realm
7,380
7,476
He thinks he's trying to impress a couple of whatever the Tatooine equivalent of shitkickers are, though, not actual smugglers/pilots/etc.
But it's stupid because HE knows what it means. If he were trolling them, sure. But he's trying to get them to hire him. That revised draft explanation doesn't mean he's lying about using parsec vs the correct term. It implies that he's lying about having made the kessel run in that amount of time. The look obiwan gives him is the look of "no one can go that fast." Not "parsec is a measurement of distance, not time, you retard."
 

Caliane

Avatar of War Slayer
15,329
11,629
Itzena is right.



The EU explanation of distance makes no goddamn sense, in fact, the whole goddamn 'Kessel Run' makes no goddamn sense, because you wouldn't travel 18 parsecs (thats 54 light years) with your sublight engines and you can't negotiate a fucking asteroid field in hyperspace.
Google it for lolz...

The Kessel Run was one of the most heavily used smuggling routes in the Galactic Empire.[4] Han Solo claimed that his Millennium Falcon "made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs". A parsec is a unit of distance, not time. Solo was not referring directly to his ship's speed when he made this claim. Instead, he was referring to the shorter route he was able to travel by skirting the nearby Maw black hole cluster, thus making the run in under the standard distance. By moving closer to the black holes, Solo managed to cut the distance down to about 11.5 parsecs.[source?] The smuggler BoShek actually beat Solo's record in his ship, Infinity, but without cargo to weigh him down. A few months later, Han Solo beat both his own and BoShek's records in a run he made with Luke Skywalker.[3]
The smuggler BoShek actually beat Solo's record in his ship, Infinity, but without cargo to weigh him down
So, its totes really distance, by using a shorter route, thats dangerous. But, cargo weight "slows" you down... in space... hahahahahah.
 

Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
43,739
52,293
So, its totes really distance, by using a shorter route, thats dangerous. But, cargo weight "slows" you down... in space... hahahahahah.
Yeah the EU explanation from Wookieepedia is what I was bitching about, but the part you're laughing about is, ironically, the only part of it that makes some sense. The weight of your cargo would have some impact on how close you could skirt the black holes in the maw when you were shortening your trip.

But again, you wouldn't be making such a long goddamn trip on your sublights. Shit like that made some sense in Battlestar Galactica, because instead of having FTL propulsion drives, they had jump drives with very limited range, so interstellar hazards were a much bigger deal to them, like the episode where they use the Raptors to escort the fleet a few ships at a time through that intensely radioactive star cluster.
 

Seananigans

Honorary Shit-PhD
<Gold Donor>
13,700
34,218
But, cargo weight "slows" you down... in space... hahahahahah.
Are you implying that weight/mass doesn't matter at all in space? That one thruster of static size/power would work with the same effectiveness whether anchored to 1 ton or 1,000,000 tons?

Tell me more.
 

Gamma Rays

Large sized member
4,005
9,585
Parsec: Named from an abbreviation of theparallax of one arcsecond,

rrr_img_97699.jpg


Take 2 observations of a celestial object 6 months apart. The parallax of a star is taken to be half of the angular distance that a star appears to move relative to the celestial sphere as Earth orbits the Sun.

A parsec is equal to about 3.26 light-years (31 trillion kilometres or 19 trillion miles) in length. The nearest star, Proxima Centauri, is about 1.3 parsecs from the Sun.

^^^
FYI: The above is mostly some cut and paste from Wikipedia.
 

Aaron

Goonsquad Officer
<Bronze Donator>
8,738
20,482
I love how I just managed to shit up this thread by mentioning the term "parsec". I also love all the EU folks trying to find strange and weird ways to make the term work within the context given when it is pretty obvious GL just picked a nice space sounding word to use in the dialogue without knowing wtf it meant.

Seriously, arguing about this is like arguing about laser sounds in space films. Sure, it's not real, but who the fuck cares, it sounds cool.

99622-Han-Solo-DEAL-WITH-IT-gif-Imgu-XU0q.gif
 

Miguex

The lad himself
<Gold Donor>
2,247
1,806
Rumors swirling that max Von sydow is indeed boba fett in episode 7