Survivor

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Kirun

Buzzfeed Editor
19,235
15,625
The "blue line!" shit from the cops is quickly becoming infuriating. A lot of it may be my disdain for them, but Tony is a good example of how sociopathic they are.

J'tia should've been the first one out. The fact that they kept her around so long is a large part of the reason their tribe now stands at 3. I don't remember a player this useless in a long, long time. Maybe Chet?
 

Pumpkin Thief

Bronze Baronet of the Realm
1,488
13,940
J'tia seemed pretty useless and has some issues that makes it seem weird that she has the employment she has, but in the end she knew she deserved to go home and didn't make too much of a fuss about it. She was not quite the despicable human being that Colton or Naonka were. Not even in the same animal kingdom as those two.
 

Lanx

<Prior Amod>
65,239
147,080
good black survivor players are
crystal cox-(the wnba player who sucked at anything physical) if the asian gamer she was best buds with played a better game (cuz it seemed like he was in control for a while) they'd be like final two, and they both had each others backs, almost every 2 person alliance seemed like a likely doublecross sooner or later, these two were like in it, just to survive.
cirie fields-typical fat black woman who was afraid of sushi (they ate a fish raw and she was wondering if that was ok) her social game and person manipulation is awesome for be useless everywhere else.
sundra oakly-while i think she's really just more known for her aitu 4 strong alliance with yul, she's also the only black woman to ever really rock any challenges

and yea the rest are your jtia, na'onka, that don't do any work around camp (always a theme), and annoy everyone
 

Gravel

Mr. Poopybutthole
39,395
129,560
Maybe I'm the weird one.. I mean, I have to be, right? But if I were ever told I was going to be on Survivor.. wait, fuck that.. if I were ever to put in an application for Survivor I WOULD LEARN HOW TO FUCKING SWIM. I don't care if you're black, white, whatever, there is no excuse for someone of that age to not be able to swim. Especially being on a show where 50% or more of the challenges are in the water! You have a PHD but you can't swim? That is some serious bullshit. I've never seen such a useless human being. I can't even imagine her being smart. I wonder how she even got a PhD in nuclear engineer, because that makes no goddamn sense. I actually question the validity of that.
You'd be surprised. OCS for the Navy (I think basic too) has a swim test, and you know exactly what it is prior to going. It's a requirement to get a commission (and therefore job) to pass the swim test. And yet, we had quite a few people who couldn't swim. So if people who have to submit this massive application to get accepted, I'd say likely significantly more in depth than Survivor, that is a pre-requisite to a career field don't learn, it's definitely not surprising that Survivor contestents wouldn't bother.

I became a badass swimmer in about 2-3 months of prep during that period though, so they definitely have no excuse. I'm pretty sure I'd practice making fire, re-watch every episode of Survivorman, read some psychology books, become an even better swimmer, and probably build some type of endurance obstacles (hold onto or stand on shit for hours) as practice.
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Nazi Janitors>
28,432
44,761
Having been a pretty active swimmer my entire life(growing up in south Florida with a pool helps!), I take for granted that people can't swim. Survivor always reminds me of it though!
 

Lanx

<Prior Amod>
65,239
147,080
my wife can't swim, i tried to teach her on one of our vacations, NOPE (it's just like why you shouldn't as a parent teach your kids how to drive), gonna find some private lessons or the Y, since we've now moved to a city.
 

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,670
2,528
There are some stunningly bad players this season. Garret was a fucking disaster. J'Tia was a bigger disaster. Sarah is almost as stupid. The cop that can sniff out a cop at 200 yards but believes everything that anyone tells her. I was so god damn pissed when she started trying to get people to throw the challenge. Nothing worse than someone who hears someone thought about voting them off and then suddenly they can't think about any other aspect of the game other than getting that person out at all costs. Hey retard, EVERYONE is trying to get you out. That is the point of the god damn game.

When J'Tia was doing whatever the fuck she was doing with the flag in the reward challenge I wanted to come up behind her and kick her in the ass. That was ridiculous and it actually crossed my mind that she might be losing on purpose but there's just no upside to that for anyone.

I'm not sure I've ever seen anyone attempt to throw a challenge and fail at it. The brain tribe is such a fucking mess.

And yeah if I was going on Survivor I would definitely be practicing my swimming and fire starting.
 

Adebisi

Clump of Cells
<Silver Donator>
27,713
32,825
just...more
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Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,272
15,094
I tell you what, I'd much rather watch her take it in the pooper than Farrah from teen mom. Vivid needs to setup some bigtime offers here. COME AHN
 

Regime

LOADING, PLEASE WAIT...
<Aristocrat╭ರ_•́>
16,861
40,080
I'm rooting for Liu Kang from here on out. Thank god he didn't throw the challenge.
 

Cantatus

Lord Nagafen Raider
1,437
79
The "blue line!" shit from the cops is quickly becoming infuriating. A lot of it may be my disdain for them, but Tony is a good example of how sociopathic they are.
The thing I find so baffling about the whole "blue line" alliance is that Sarah thinks just because Tony is also a cop that he won't lie to her and she can trust him implicitly, but somehow forgets that their first interaction was him lying right to her face about not being a cop. She's so eager to pat herself on the back for her "copdar" that she just blocks that out completely. Meanwhile, she also apparently missed the last 80 years of cinema to not realize why the words "bad" and "dirty" often precede "cop".
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Nazi Janitors>
28,432
44,761
The thing I find so baffling about the whole "blue line" alliance is that Sarah thinks just because Tony is also a cop that he won't lie to her and she can trust him implicitly, but somehow forgets that their first interaction was him lying right to her face about not being a cop. She's so eager to pat herself on the back for her "copdar" that she just blocks that out completely. Meanwhile, she also apparently missed the last 80 years of cinema to not realize why the words "bad" and "dirty" often precede "cop".
Female cop. I'm not sure there's a worse bad-decision-making combo.
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Nazi Janitors>
28,432
44,761
Does she MMA fight too? I must have missed that!