The Girls Who Broke Your Heart Thread

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Cutlery

Cutlery

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What's fun? Telling people that are giving actual relationship advice to other guys that they don't know what they're talking about?

Look around, dude. Look the other relationships around you. Look at the guys who can't go out with their buddies after they get married. Look at the guys who sell their motorcycles. Look at the guys who complain/laugh/joke about not getting any sex. What is the commonality between these people? If your wife is treating you like shit, it's because you're letting her.
 
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lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Cutlery said:
If your wife is treating you like shit, it's because you're letting her.
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Wow. No, it isn't.

You could be a douche bag to her. You could be an alcoholic. You could be not engaging her. You could be a thousand things that would make her treat you like shit. Conversely, she could be mentally unstable, postpartum depression, alcoholic, whatever.

There is no cause for you to red pill your wife. Period. You don't have to be an asshole to be appropriately assertive. Having to puff yourself up in order to dominate to the point of control is not a healthy relationship model. If you can't see that, I'm sorry for whomever you are in a relationship with.
 
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Cutlery

Cutlery

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You don't get it.

If you tell your wife that you're going out on a camping trip and she says "no you're not," and you want to kill yourself over it, then you don't have control in the relationship.

I'm not saying you need to beat the shit out of her. I'm not saying you need to tell her to have dinner on the table at 5. I'm saying you need to have some fucking self respect and not let her control your fucking life. If my wife said she was going somewhere and I told her "No you're not," she would laugh in my face and walk out the fucking door. The same would happen if she tried to do the same to me.

If you don't see that, then you're the one I'm sorry for. Your wife probably has it pretty good.
 
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Destiny's Paw

Destiny's Paw

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Someone is thinking about offing themselves and we sit around bickering at each other.

Taking your life is a permanent solution for a temporary problem. Relationships come and go but your child will always need and want you around. Fix it or leave it, but stick around for your son.
 
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iannis

iannis

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Soygen said:
Ok, how about, "Any woman worth a shit does not want a weak man."

Who the hell wants a weak partner?
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To be fair, I've known some guys that do.

To be equally fair, they're weak men desperate for someone to dominate.
 
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Conefed

Conefed

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Camping trip was excellent. When the other wives started posting pictures of their own sons being excited leading up to the trip, she realized I wasn't lying.

She has something called schizoaffective disorder - It's been a good few days. When we came home, she apologized and said she realized how much she missed us. but in the same sentence got on me for son having found two pennies, not believing that he found them, instead thinking I paid him that for sexual acts..
mental illness is bullshit.
 
kegkilla

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Conefed said:
When we came home, she apologized and said she realized how much she missed us. but in the same sentence got on me for son having found two pennies, not believing that he found them, instead thinking I paid him that for sexual acts..
mental illness is bullshit.
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what the fuck? how do you let her get off an accusation like that without breaking her jaw?
 
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Xequecal

Xequecal

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Cutlery said:
You don't get it.

If you tell your wife that you're going out on a camping trip and she says "no you're not," and you want to kill yourself over it, then you don't have control in the relationship.

I'm not saying you need to beat the shit out of her. I'm not saying you need to tell her to have dinner on the table at 5. I'm saying you need to have some fucking self respect and not let her control your fucking life. If my wife said she was going somewhere and I told her "No you're not," she would laugh in my face and walk out the fucking door. The same would happen if she tried to do the same to me.

If you don't see that, then you're the one I'm sorry for. Your wife probably has it pretty good.
Click to expand...

The tone of this post is completely different from your previous one. This is good advice, "you need to take control of the relationship and she'll fall back into line" is not.
 
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Cutlery

Cutlery

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Oh, did I hurt your feelings?

Sorry about that bro, i'll be more careful of my wording on posts not directed towards you.
 
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Conefed

Conefed

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Wantonsoup95 said:
How in the hell can you stay with someone who says shit like that? How's that good for your son?
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Exactly why I've come to my Bros. I've been with y'all like a decade longer than her.

As far as meds go. She takes them. But I suspect dosage is off, but I have no input due to hippa or whatever. I've tried through both social services and community services.

To those now wondering, I "knew" about the condition, but it was framed in a way that it was a temporary response to a traumatic experience before we dated.
As my OP, she flipped script once got married. Because there wasn't anything terrible in the three years dating (knew her through friends dating back to Junior high and none warned me either). She had standard nervousness, anxiety, and trust issues appropriate to her situation.

But since, has gone astronomical.
I hold down the fort, and keep my son mostly safe from the goblins, but she gets ridiculous and despite my manliness, I get kicked in the feels. Which over the not even year, has saturated me.

Good times feel really good, but I admit my standards have sorely dropped.
 
kegkilla

kegkilla

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Conefed said:
Exactly why I've come to my Bros. I've been with y'all like a decade longer than her.

As far as meds go. She takes them. But I suspect dosage is off, but I have no input due to hippa or whatever. I've tried through both social services and community services.

To those now wondering, I "knew" about the condition, but it was framed in a way that it was a temporary response to a traumatic experience before we dated.
As my OP, she flipped script once got married. Because there wasn't anything terrible in the three years dating (knew her through friends dating back to Junior high and none warned me either). She had standard nervousness, anxiety, and trust issues appropriate to her situation.

But since, has gone astronomical.
I hold down the fort, and keep my son mostly safe from the goblins, but she gets ridiculous and despite my manliness, I get kicked in the feels. Which over the not even year, has saturated me.

Good times feel really good, but I admit my standards have sorely dropped.
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what was the "traumatic event" before you dated?
 
Conefed

Conefed

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kegkilla said:
what was the "traumatic event" before you dated?
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She dated guy for like four years, married, and then found out he was secretly addict and they were broke despite having nice things. He had also stolen thousands from her friends and relatives somehow. One day he came home destroyed and put a gun to her.
(My own mother had nearly same happen to her and my dad came into her picture at roughly equivalent time gap to my wife. So flags weren't waved)
Her first episode was apparently over spring break when instead of eating, she got continuously high and drunk and surfed. But again, to me, no flags because like Eminem said, "I'm high too Bitch, this is what's supposed to happen"

Reading more about her disorder after posting here, it indeed can manifest in response to heavy drug use and stress.
It also said there currently is no cure, but proper treatment may reduce all symptoms.
 
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kegkilla

kegkilla

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Conefed said:
She dated guy for like four years, married, and then found out he was secretly addict and they were broke despite having nice things. He had also stolen thousands from her friends and relatives somehow. One day he came home destroyed and put a gun to her.
(My own mother had nearly same happen to her and my dad came into her picture at roughly equivalent time gap to my wife. So flags weren't waved)
Her first episode was apparently over spring break when instead of eating, she got continuously high and drunk and surfed. But again, to me, no flags because like Eminem said, "I'm high too Bitch, this is what's supposed to happen"

Reading more about her disorder after posting here, it indeed can manifest in response to heavy drug use and stress.
It also said there currently is no cure, but proper treatment may reduce all symptoms.
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I get the feeling she had issues way before her first marriage. Do you have insight into what happened other than what has been filtered through her? I would be surprised if she wasn't getting high with the guy the whole time.
 
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Conefed

Conefed

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kegkilla said:
what the fuck? how do you let her get off an accusation like that without breaking her jaw?
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The first time I certainly felt compelled to. I managed not to break anything, somehow, and walked longer than I had in some time.
I have years of hospitality and anger management experience, including coping skills coaching.

She does it often, and I've just about ran out of tactics besides leaving, shutting down, or hurting her.

I was a warrior in EverQuest. Taking punishment and figuring out the puzzle is what I do. I just haven't figured this one out
 
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Soygen

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Should've been a monk and feigned death until she walked off.
 
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