What tickles your pickle

Hoss said:

you gotta make noises too. Grunting. Heavy breathing. "IT BURNS"

Click to expand...

Uninspired.


"A blood black nothingness began to spin.
Began to spin.
Let's move on to system. System.
Feel that in your body. The system.
What does it feel like to be part of the system. System.
Is there anything in your body that wants to resist the system? System.
Do you get pleasure out of being a part of the system? System.
Have they created you to be a part of the system? System.
Is there security in being a part of the system? System.
Is there a sound that comes with the system? System.
We're going to go on. Cells.
They were all put together at a time. Cells.
Millions and billions of them. Cells.
Were you ever arrested? Cells.
Did you spend much time in the cell? Cells.
Have you ever been in an instituion? Cells.
Do they keep you in a cell? Cells.
When you're not performing your duties do they keep you in a little box? Cells.
Interlinked.
What's it like to hold the hand of someone you love? Interlinked.
Do they teach you how to feel finger to finger? Interlinked.
Do you long for having your heart interlinked? Interlinked.
Do you dream about being interlinked?
Have they left a place for you where you can dream? Interlinked.
What's it like to hold your child in your arms? Interlinked.
What's it like to play with your dog? Interlinked.
Do you feel that there's a part of you that's missing? Interlinked.
Do you like to connect to things? Interlinked.
What happens when that linkage is broken? Interlinked.
Have they let you feel heartbreak? Interlinked.
Did you buy a present for the person you love? Within cells interlinked.
Why don't you say that three times? Within cells interlinked. Within cells interlinked. Within cells interlinked.
Where do you go when you go within? Within.
Has anyone ever locked you out of a room? Within.
Within.
Where do you go to when you go within? Within.
Where is the place in the world you feel the safest? Within.
Do you have a heart? Within.
Stem.
Did you pick asparagus stems?
What comes from something else? Stem.
Have you been to the source of a river? Stem.
When's the first time you gave a flower to a girl? Stem.
What did she look like? Stem.
Is it a slang word for people's legs? Stem.
Have you planeted things in the ground? Stem.
Have you ever been in a legal battle? Stem.
Within one stem.
Dreadfully.
Is that an old fashioned word? Dreadfully.
Did you ever want to live in the nineteenth century? Dreadfully.
What's it like to be filled with dread? Dreadfully.
Do you think you could find out all the answers to all the questions? Dreadfully.
Distinct.
How good are your eyes? Distinct.
Do you have a particular personality? Distinct.
What separates somebody from somebody else? Distinct.
Who do you admire most in the world? Distinct.
What was your most shameful moment? Distinct.
Dreadfully distinct.
Dark.
Were you afraid of the dark whan you were little? Dark.
What's it like to hide under a bed? Dark.
Did they keep you in a drawer when they were building you? Dark?
Was it dark in there? Dark.
Do you have dark thoughts? Dark?
Did they program you to have dark thoughts? Dark?
Do you think it's some kind of corruption these dark thoughts? Dark.
Maybe it's a spot of rust or something? Dark.
Who's the darkest person you know? Dark.
What is it like when someone gives you the silent treatment. Dark.
Who did you get your darkness from? Dark.
Against the dark.
What kind of power do you have against the dark. Against the dark.
Do you think there is such a thing as evil? Against the dark.
Do you think you can protect people against the dark. Against the dark.
Why are these things happening? Against the dark.
Do you prefer the day or the night? Against the dark.
When is the last time you saw a starry sky? Against the dark.
What's your favorite part of the moon? Against the dark.
Fountain.
Have you seen the Trevi fountain in Rome? Fountain.
Have you ever seen the fountain in Lincoln center? Fountain.
Have you seen fountains out in the wild? Fountain.
What's it like when you have an orgasm. Fountain.
Have you read the Fountainhead? Fountain.
White Fountain.
Is it pure white? White Fountain.
Is that a metaphor? White Fountain.
How did the white Fountain make you feel? White Fountain.
A tall white fountain played.
When you were little did you ever fall into a Fountain? A Tall White Fountain.
Do you like fire, earth, air or water. A Tall White Fountain.
Do you like skipping around in the water? A Tall White Fountain.
A blood black nothingness.
A system of cells.
Within cells interlinked.
Within one stem.
And dreadfully distinct.
Against the dark.
A tall white fountain played."

My barber shop has 6 dudes and 1 lady that work there. There's 3 guys that I'll get a haircut from out all of them. While waiting today, the lady said she was ready and I told her I'd wait for one of the other gentleman. Apparently she was having a rough day because she kind of scoffed and said "I dont know why y'all sit around waiting for them when you're just getting buzzcuts". I said "Because they don't wear 2 gallons of perfume or talk my ear off the whole time". The whole place started laughing and she just said "oh fuck off" and went on lunch break.

Edit - her perfume life choices are often the topic of Convo

I just found out one of the young engineers I work with is really, really into hot air balloons. He was all excited this morning because he woke up at 4am and spent 3 hours chasing hot air balloons all over the place in his jeep. He wasn't part of the event, he was just taking pictures and videos.

Watching faceoff.

I totally tried this move on a girlfriend when I was 18 and she said "what the fuck"

My dog shits in gopher holes. Directly into them. In the pipe, five by five.

There's one guy at work I don't like. We don't talk to each other. His linkedin profile has #OpenToWork in it, so for the past 2 weeks I've been emailing job postings to him any time they hit me inbox. I don't say anything, I just forward them on.

The HR manager just asked me about it and I just shrugged and said "trying to be helpful. Building bridges and all that". She just smirked and changed the subject after.

I guess my friend had his buddy ship a wedding ring to my house so they wouldn't have to pay sales tax or something. He's texting me asking if it's shown up yet. I'm sitting here thinking what he would do if I tucked it in my buttcheeks and took a picture and sent it to them when it shows up. Obviously not going to take a joke THAT far, but I'm laughing and wondering what someone would do when faced with that kind of predicament. Obviously an ass beating is on the table, but....do you keep it or send it back? If you keep it, do you tell her?