What tickles your pickle

Bandwagon

Bandwagon

Kolohe
<Rickshaw Potatoes>
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My 5 year old while we were driving around this morning

"red light is when you stop, green light is when you go, and yellow light is when you try to make it"
 
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Reactions: 2 users
Conefed

Conefed

Blackwing Lair Raider
2,850
1,702
When your sudden shock from realizing the dog is suspiciously quiet is broken at the sight of them laying peacefully at your feet.
 
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Pogi.G

Pogi.G

Silver Baronet of the Realm
1,870
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Bandwagon said:
This article is the best thing I've read all week
www.foxnews.com

South Carolina teacher accused of illicit tryst with teen: 'She ruined our son's life'

The mother of a high school football player blasted the teacher accused of sexually assaulting him as a 'predator' who deserved to be behind bars to protect the community.
www.foxnews.com www.foxnews.com
Click to expand...

Yeah, there isn't a snowball's chance in hell that these encounters "ruined his life". This dude is going to someday tell his great grandchildren about banging his hot 27-year-old teacher. It was the greatest 30 seconds of this dude's life. I feel sorry for the husband though. Ouch...
 
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Palum

Palum

what Suineg set it to
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48,944
I haven't had a chance to do any 3d modeling since I got my 4090. Thought Blender was broken but turned out it was just too fast.

giphy.gif
 
  • 3Worf
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Palum

Palum

what Suineg set it to
29,215
48,944
Bandwagon said:
Trying to explain daylight savings time to a 5 year old
Click to expand...
Urban coffee drinking unemployed women hate farmers and wanted to be able to buy Starbucks with the sun out so we all have to change time for them.
 
  • 2Worf
Reactions: 1 users
Hoss

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
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Palum said:
Urban coffee drinking unemployed women hate farmers and wanted to be able to buy Starbucks with the sun out so we all have to change time for them.
Click to expand...

Don't forget that many of them actually believe DST gives us an extra hour of daylight.
 
  • 1Worf
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Reactions: 2 users
Bandwagon

Bandwagon

Kolohe
<Rickshaw Potatoes>
25,021
68,664
There's a new country bar /BBQ joint in town that I went to last night with some friends. Meat platters, cowboy hats, mechanical bull, etc.

Only two urinals in the bathroom. Two old guys were taking a piss (and talking about each other's wife's tits I think) when I walked in, so I went in the stall and found this
Screenshot_20231209-112140.png


About 5 seconds after I took this pic, the bathroom lights (motion detector/timer) shut off and it was pitch black. All 3 of us started chuckling, and I yelled "HEY!! WHO'S MOUTH IS THAT?!?" and they laughed their asses off.

One of the employees poked his head in the door, the lights came back on and he said "You gentleman doing ok in here?". One of the old guys, still laughing, said "Yea, well, go get the mop kid".

All 3 of us walked out of the bathroom at the same time, red faced and laughing. Weird thing to explain at the dinner table.
 
Last edited:
  • 13Worf
  • 1Double Worf
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Edaw

Edaw

Parody
<Gold Donor>
14,354
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Bandwagon said:
There's a new country bar /BBQ joint in town that I went to last night with some friends. Meat platters, cowboy hats, mechanical bull, etc.

Only two urinals in the bathroom. Two old guys were taking a piss (and talking about each other's wife's tits I think) when I walked in, so I went in the stall and found this
View attachment 503667

About 5 seconds after I took this pic, the bathroom lights (motion detector/timer) shut off and it was pitch black. All 3 of us started chuckling, and I yelled "HEY!! WHO'S MOUTH IS THAT?!?" and they laughed their asses off.

One of the employees poked his head in the door, the lights came back on and he said "You gentleman doing ok in here?". One of the old guys, still laughing, said "Yea, well, go get the mop kid".

All 3 of us walked out of the bathroom at the same time, red faced and laughing. Weird thing to explain at the dinner table.
Click to expand...
88t41k.jpg
 
  • 13Worf
  • 2Double Worf
Reactions: 14 users
lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

AssHat Taint
<Medals Crew>
50,698
245,002
My son, who is small in stature, playing varsity high school hockey this morning evaded a check that was coming on both sides (2 players from the other team). Ducked out of it, carried the puck through, and scored. The two players both injured each other. I know I shouldn't delight in teenagers getting hurt, but dang did it feel good to watch them destroy each other instead of my son.
 
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Hoss

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
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I got an antenna a few weeks ago and today I found a channel called Comet. When I turned it on there was a christmas movie with martians from the 60s. Turns out it was called Santa Clause Conquers Mars. It was so fucking awesome. I finally found a christmas show that compares with the star wars life day special.

Right after that was a movie from the 80s or 70s where santa clause killed a kids parents in front of him. I think santa actually raped mom in the original because he dragged her out of the car, straddled her, and her tits were out (and blurred) when he slit her throat. No idea what that was but the kid was an adult and it looked like he dead ass believed Santa killed his parents.

I need to get some whiskey and see what else this channel has to offer.
 
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Vuuxo

Vuuxo

Scaphism
<Gold Donor>
1,575
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Hoss said:
Right after that was a movie from the 80s or 70s where santa clause killed a kids parents in front of him. I think santa actually raped mom in the original because he dragged her out of the car, straddled her, and her tits were out (and blurred) when he slit her throat. No idea what that was but the kid was an adult and it looked like he dead ass believed Santa killed his parents.

I need to get some whiskey and see what else this channel has to offer.
Click to expand...


Silent Night Deadly Night?
 
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Hoss

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
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Vuuxo said:
Silent Night Deadly Night?
Click to expand...

Could be. I watched 3 trailers and didn't see anything I recognized from the first 2 scenes. But the kid coulda been the same (honky children all look the same) and I'm 99.9% sure his name was billy.
 
Control

Control

Bronze Baronet of the Realm
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9,868
lurkingdirk said:
My son, who is small in stature, playing varsity high school hockey this morning evaded a check that was coming on both sides (2 players from the other team). Ducked out of it, carried the puck through, and scored. The two players both injured each other. I know I shouldn't delight in teenagers getting hurt, but dang did it feel good to watch them destroy each other instead of my son.
Click to expand...
Eddie Murphy GIF by Coming to America

Also
1702172655662.png
 
  • 2Worf
Reactions: 1 users
Bandwagon

Bandwagon

Kolohe
<Rickshaw Potatoes>
25,021
68,664
I told my daughter she could watch one cartoon before bed. She got mad I wouldn't let her watch a 2nd episode, so she:
* Got a toy sword and started doing pirouettes in the living room
* Boxed with her inflatable punching box while yelling "One, two, dad!"
* Climbed to the top of her climbing wall and said "I DARE you, stinkdad!" (It's next to the master bedroom and she was trying to jump on me when I walked by)
* Shot me in the side of the face with her nerf bow (from about 15 feet away)

I shut that shit down when she shot me in the face, but I barely kept a straight face when I dropped the hammer and put her in time out.
 
  • 5Worf
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