You get one superpower

  • Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!



    Go here and give us your nominations!
    Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!

Choose a Super Power

  • Hear the inner monologue of anyone over the age of 70 (passive)

  • Pubic hair grows 5% faster on anyone you touch (passive)(max: 5 stacks)

  • Once per day, make any person you look at briefly think of their parents naked (active)

  • Your boogers are peanut brittle (passive)

  • Once a day, two fully charged AA batteries appear in your left pocket (if you have one) (passive)

  • You can sneeze 10-100 easter peeps at will (active)

  • You can make the last smoke alarm you touched go off by thinking about it (active)

  • Your farts always have an upward/inquisitive inflexion (passive)

  • Saying "FUS ROH DAH" 300x consecutively causes Bethesda to release a new version of Skyrim (active)

  • Your tears and semen turn into soy sauce as soon as they lose contact with your body (passive)

  • Every time you defecate, 25 of Bandwagon's taste buds transfer from his mouth to his asshole.

Results are only viewable after voting.
Hoss

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
<Gold Donor>
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How sweet, he made you a mix tape. Next thing ya know he'll be outside your window playing it on his boom box.
 
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