No idea how it will happen, but some shit always goes wrong for a current playoff team.
Either some important guy gets paid and then falls off a cliff, bunch of veterans hit FA, or maybe just a rash of injuries.
2013 NFL Season
- Thread starter Gravel
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Either some important guy gets paid and then falls off a cliff, bunch of veterans hit FA, or maybe just a rash of injuries.
Wombat
Trakanon Raider
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Well, you usually get 4+ team turnover, but that's leaguewide; last year, 5 out of 6 AFC teams repeated, including all 4 divisional champs repeating.
I'm the most vocal person saying the Colts won't be back, but it's not impossible that they beat out the Dolphins and Steelers for the last WC spot either, especially if the Jags and Titans remain weak.
I just wouldn't assume the AFC can't stay the same because there's usually turnover, especially when most of the NFC is up for grabs (the 49ers and Seahawks seem like locks, but in-division records can kill your in-conference standings).
Gravel
Mr. Poopybutthole
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I don't think you can say the Seahawks or the Niners are locks. If the AFC South isn't completely soft, they both have somewhat difficult schedules. And if the Rams are in it to compete this year, you could possibly see both of them missing the playoffs. Is it likely? Probably not, I'd say there's a good chance one of the two makes the playoffs. But in no way are both teams locks.
Famm
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Other than the Colts, and maybe the WC in general, what part of that is terribly unlikely? Texans, Patriots, Broncos....what other team in those divisions do you honestly expect to emerge as division champs? I mean, I'm pulling for the Chiefs and all but I'm a fucking idiot.
I can grant anyone giving Bengals/Steelers/Ravens equal odds on the division and then a WC spot for another AFCN team. But really, Colts (WC maybe division if Texans shit the bed and get swept by them in division matchups) Jags, Titans, Chiefs, Raiders, Chargers, Jets, Dolphins, Bills. The Colts are the only ones who you can even expect to have a franchise QB and Luck could easily have a sophomore slump or some growing pains or whatever. I personally think the Colts will look improved and as long as Luck plays well they have as much of a shot as anyone in the conference.
But overall everyone called the AFC the inferior conference last year with good reason. Expecting very similar results is not unrealistic. Sure, exact same is not fucking likely. But four of six teams back in the same place sounds pretty feasible.
Sutekh
Blackwing Lair Raider
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How fat do you have to be for your sides to hurt from laughing? That's the dumbest fucking expression I've ever heard.Sides hurt from laughing.
A Tribute To Sage Rosenfels: The Greatest of All-Time
Sage Rosenfels, the most prolific and iconic passer that football has ever known, has decided to hang up his cleats after 11 triumphant seasons in the NFL, during which he revolutionized his position and became the first quarterback to win more than four Super Bowl championships.
The 109th selection of the 2001 NFL Draft by the Washington Redskins, Rosenfels propelled to immediate stardom. He came to be known as ?Jew Montana? after leading Washington to consecutive championships in his first two seasons in the league. That unprecedented success, however, was not enough to stave off a power struggle with owner Daniel Snyder, who bristled at the public perception that the Redskins? success was due almost entirely to the arm of Rosenfels and not Snyder?s personnel moves. In a blockbuster trade, Rosenfels was shipped to Miami for six first-round draft picks, which the Redskins used in turn to acquire quarterback Aaron Brooks from the Saints. The rest is history: Rosenfels won the next two Super Bowls with the Dolphins while Snyder and Brooks perished in a tragic accident testing a new Six Flags roller coaster in Prince George?s County, Maryland.
Though the Dolphins reaped the immediate spoils of the trade, the team was unable to work out a long-term contract with Rosenfels to keep him in Miami beyond his two years with the team. The summer of 2005 came to be known as ?The Summer of Saga? as the sweepstakes to secure the then-four-time Super Bowl champion quarterback captivated the sports world. It helpede that Rosenfels? fame was starting to transcend that of just a sports star. It was that year that Rosenfels starred in the movie ?Birthright? about a man who travels to Israel to work on a kibbutz and falls in love with a two women there, one of which was played by actress Natalie Portman.
Portman and Rosenfels could not keep their romance secret for long. Not that it mattered, as the two were married within months of meeting each other. In fact, by the start of the 2005 season, which Rosenfels played with the Houston Texans, Sage and Natalie Rosenfels were the most famous couple in the world.
Indeed, the Texans forked over a record five-year, $219 million contract to retain Rosenfels services, a contract that remains the richest in the history of the league. It was clearly worth every penny, as Rosenfels won four titles in his five seasons in Houston. In his second season in Houston, Rosenfels posted a perfect passer rating in every start, which led to the coinage of his enduring nickname, ?Mr. 158.3? The act of posting a perfect passer rating was thereafter known as a ?Rosenfels?. The 109th pick has since been known as ?The Rosenfels pick?.
The only year the Texans did not win the Super Bowl with Rosenfels under center was his last with the team, when he suffered a season-ending knee injury inflicted by Patriots safety Bernard Pollard. There were cries for the league to cancel the remainder of the season, but Rosenfels would hear nothing of it. He swore to fans that he was not greater than the game, a sentiment that only made fans love him more.
Unfortunately, the Texans had concerns about his long-term health after the injury, so once again Rosenfels was allowed to enter free agency. Now in his thirties, Rosenfels didn?t command quite as much in the market, so he only received a three-year, $86 million deal from the New York Giants.
The pressure of playing in the Big Apple was daunting and did affect Rosenfels more than he led on at first. In his first season in New York, he threw both of his two career interceptions. Nevertheless, he was voted the league MVP, as well as Super Bowl MVP, as he led the Giants to a title, as he did this past season, his second with the franchise. The 2012 season was somewhat overshadowed by the fact that Rosenfels was not under contract beyond the season. Some thought it would serve as a distraction, but obviously it didn?t. After capturing his record 10th Super Bowl title, Rosenfels was beset by inquiries about his future, but refused to give any definitive answers until he had time to think things over.
And now we know his decision: the end of football most glorious era is at an end and the immediate future of the NFL will be marked with the narrative ?Can there be another Rosenfels and if so, who??
Comments section had me in tears.
Rosenfels: This is Rosencopter one, preparing to engage Colt Bogeys.
Gary Kubiak: Don?t do it Rosencopter one, that?s suicide!
Rosenfels: I can do it coach! AWWWWW!!!
/Rosencopter One is violently destroyed.
Famm
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You really are a pale shadow of your former trolling greatness. I think this wife has sapped your mojo. Look at you man,positive internets!!!!What's next, diaper bag? Minivan? Playing JRPG's with Sean?
Famm
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Gravy
Bronze Squire
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NFC
North: Bears
South: Saints
East: Redskins
West: Seahawks
Wildcards: 49ers, Packers
AFC
North: Bengals
South: Colts
East: Patriots
West: Chiefs (Surprise, right? This is obviously a throw-away pick.)
Wildcards: Ravens, Broncos
Super-secret double probation Superbowl pick: 49ers vs. Colts.
North: Bears
South: Saints
East: Redskins
West: Seahawks
Wildcards: 49ers, Packers
AFC
North: Bengals
South: Colts
East: Patriots
West: Chiefs (Surprise, right? This is obviously a throw-away pick.)
Wildcards: Ravens, Broncos
Super-secret double probation Superbowl pick: 49ers vs. Colts.
Famm
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
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Merrith
Golden Baronet of the Realm
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I'm as big a Skins homer as anyone, but I have a hard time believe we'll go above .500 this year with our schedule going from a last place one to a 1st place one. Packers, Niners, Falcons, plus the rest of the NFC North. I have serious doubts we repeat our 5-1 mark in the division from last year too. Obviously RG3's health and play is a huge factor but even best case you have to expect the league to be better prepared for the read option plus with the schedule being tougher I just can't see us repeating as NFC East champs.
I have confidence in the Skins going better than 8-8, but that division is open to 3 of its teams. I'm amazed anyone is picking the Eagles, they don't even know who their QB is yet and their head coach has zero NFL experience
Burnem Wizfyre
Log Wizard
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Gravel
Mr. Poopybutthole
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The NFC East is kind of down right now. The Giants aren't the same team they were several years ago when they could rely on a strong defense. In fact, they were 31st last year. Those strong lines they counted on are pretty much gone and even their linebackers are starting to become a problem. Even in their recent Super Bowl seasons, they weren't strong teams. They just got hot to close them out. Otherwise they were teams that struggled to make the playoffs.
The Cowboys basically need to pray they stay healthy. I'm still not sold on either one of their lines. I think Garrett no longer calling plays may be the best thing that happens to them. Dude just didn't know how to call a game. I have no idea that Callahan is capable of that, but he can't do much worse. The last several years they've been in the division race until the very end. But they always seem to choke it away.
The Eagles...fuck, I don't know how anyone can be picking them to finish in anything but last place? Are they going to ride Vick, who turned the ball over in spectacular fashion last year, Nick Foles who has done...something (challenge Vick for turnovers?), or Matt Barkley who is almost surely another in a long line of terrible USC quarterbacks. Oh, they've got Chip? I can't figure out why he's going to magically figure out the NFL. The list of successful NCAA coaches who bombed in the NFL is way longer than those who succeeded.
And then we have the Redskins. Personally, I'm not worried about RG3's injury. In fact, from the sounds of it he's already almost back to normal. Keep in mind that Dr. Andrews did the surgery on Peterson too, and he just had a career season. That said, it's always possible he gets injured a different way this season. I'm not sold on the offensive line, and the defense, what can I say? That secondary last year was abyssmal. I don't know that getting injured players back and adding a few rookies is really going to fix that. Unless Orakpo has a career year (and that's doubtful since he's been unable to stay healthy the last two) and can get some amazing pressure on opposing QB's, I expect the Redskins to be in a lot of shoot outs.
Really, I see the Giants, Cowboys, and Redskins all winning some games they should've lost and losing to terrible teams only to end up all in the division race in the last 2-3 weeks of the season. Just like always happens in the NFC East. My gut tells me it'll be between the Cowboys and Redskins again. Giants really miracled some shit last year.
The Cowboys basically need to pray they stay healthy. I'm still not sold on either one of their lines. I think Garrett no longer calling plays may be the best thing that happens to them. Dude just didn't know how to call a game. I have no idea that Callahan is capable of that, but he can't do much worse. The last several years they've been in the division race until the very end. But they always seem to choke it away.
The Eagles...fuck, I don't know how anyone can be picking them to finish in anything but last place? Are they going to ride Vick, who turned the ball over in spectacular fashion last year, Nick Foles who has done...something (challenge Vick for turnovers?), or Matt Barkley who is almost surely another in a long line of terrible USC quarterbacks. Oh, they've got Chip? I can't figure out why he's going to magically figure out the NFL. The list of successful NCAA coaches who bombed in the NFL is way longer than those who succeeded.
And then we have the Redskins. Personally, I'm not worried about RG3's injury. In fact, from the sounds of it he's already almost back to normal. Keep in mind that Dr. Andrews did the surgery on Peterson too, and he just had a career season. That said, it's always possible he gets injured a different way this season. I'm not sold on the offensive line, and the defense, what can I say? That secondary last year was abyssmal. I don't know that getting injured players back and adding a few rookies is really going to fix that. Unless Orakpo has a career year (and that's doubtful since he's been unable to stay healthy the last two) and can get some amazing pressure on opposing QB's, I expect the Redskins to be in a lot of shoot outs.
Really, I see the Giants, Cowboys, and Redskins all winning some games they should've lost and losing to terrible teams only to end up all in the division race in the last 2-3 weeks of the season. Just like always happens in the NFC East. My gut tells me it'll be between the Cowboys and Redskins again. Giants really miracled some shit last year.