Dating

pharmakos · Apr 11, 2023

Chukzombi said:
seriously? i own the NB 990s, gray ones that are actually made in USA and they are spendy, nobody ever complimented those. i have a pair of Sorel boots half the price and i keep them buffed up. i get compliments from chicks. sneakers on dates sounds like a bad idea for a man. its ok for women because they can be jackasses.

Who says I wear sneakers on dates? I'm talking about random compliments talking to girls at parties / in class / etc.

Chukzombi · Apr 11, 2023

Drinsic said:
so... you don't tower over her.

i do when she isnt wearing stilts, i barely do when she is. google platform sneakers and see for yourself.

Chukzombi · Apr 11, 2023

pharmakos said:
Who says I wear sneakers on dates? I'm talking about random compliments talking to girls at parties / in class / etc.

a party is a social event, unless its a sausage party, you should be dressing for the occasion. keep in mind there are different rules for different ages. a bunch of 20 yr olds you can show up with no shirt and your chest painted and fit right in. nobody cares about your shoes. over 30 and you gotta look like you arent a bum. that means nice clean shirt, pants and shoes. if you cant survive without sneakers, then wait til 3pm when high school gets out and try your luck with those girls.

pharmakos · Apr 11, 2023

Chukzombi said:
a party is a social event, unless its a sausage party, you should be dressing for the occasion. keep in mind there are different rules for different ages. a bunch of 20 yr olds you can show up with no shirt and your chest painted and fit right in. nobody cares about your shoes. over 30 and you gotta look like you arent a bum. that means nice clean shirt, pants and shoes. if you cant survive without sneakers, then wait til 3pm when high school gets out and try your luck with those girls.

Bruv I was going to keggers with puddles of beer on the floor I'm not gonna wear my good shoes lmao

pharmakos · Apr 11, 2023

Another thing that matters a lot to women is social reputation. And I was pretty well known / popular, the sort of guy that could randomly drop into random parties anywhere between campus and downtown and know at least a few people. I'm good looking but (as long as you're at least not an ugly slob) chicks notice that shit more than they notice looks.

This is getting off topic for dating advice tho. Didn't realize posting an old selfie would lead to everyone analyzing College Age Pharmakos lol

Chukzombi · Apr 11, 2023

pharmakos said:
Bruv I was going to keggers with puddles of beer on the floor I'm not gonna wear my good shoes lmao

yeah, Keggers and that kind of shit is par for the course, you arent going to wear actual clothes adult humans wear at those things. its basically a freeforall. i meant parties that you attend in your 30s where you are the asshole if you show up drunk. keggers were a lot of fun because everyone is stupid drunk and you dont know how they will end up. maybe getting laid, maybe passing out and waking up with a bunch of dicks drawn all over your forehead or maybe you die. the old fogey parties are fun too in their own way, but you gotta wear clothes that real adults wear.

Control · Apr 11, 2023

Chukzombi said:
i meant parties that you attend in your 30s where you are the asshole if you show up drunk.

Borzak · Apr 11, 2023

All my close women friends love picking out clothes for me and taking my pic to send to another woman. Just what they do. It's like playing dress up with a large doll I guess. The ones that are married do the same. They have to get me married and have said that forever. Thanks for the help I guess. Was never looking to get married. The thing is if a woman wants to introduce you to one of her friends if you ask the right questions they will quickly turn on that person and tell you anything and everything that could possibly be wrong with her and they talk about the way guys talk about people.

It's impossible to meet a woman in my line of work. So the regular places you go, the store and events and such. Costco, target , not walmart. College baseball games have been good for me, it's popular sport at LSU and someone gives 4 people tickets and almost always one of them is a single woman and is the odd one out. That and out tailgating. You don't have to go full homo but stop wearing the velcro tennis shoes, yes I know someone that does.

Chukzombi · Apr 11, 2023

The supermarket is a great place to meet women. Especially since a lot of women are short and they can't reach the items on top shelves. You stroll by and grab the item for them. You become the hero. Help them with getting their bags in the car since chicks buy a literal ton of bottled water now and have trouble lifting the cases. Lots of opportunities. I've taken advantage of it a few times. Just gotta make sure she isn't married. Kids are no big deal unless you plan on getting serious.

Drinsic · Apr 11, 2023

Chukzombi said:
i do when she isnt wearing stilts, i barely do when she is. google platform sneakers and see for yourself.

my point was that if you're going to use the word "tower" to say you're taller than someone, it wouldn't be barely.

Hoss · Apr 11, 2023

ToeMissile said:
I'm surprised no one has mentioned that the photo is taken in a public restroom...

That's a pro-tip for finding a clean mirror to take a selfie with.

Borzak · Apr 11, 2023

Chukzombi said:
The supermarket is a great place to meet women. Especially since a lot of women are short and they can't reach the items on top shelves. You stroll by and grab the item for them. You become the hero. Help them with getting their bags in the car since chicks buy a literal ton of bottled water now and have trouble lifting the cases. Lots of opportunities. I've taken advantage of it a few times. Just gotta make sure she isn't married. Kids are no big deal unless you plan on getting serious.

My current girlfriend is 4'11 and I'm 6'1. I'm sure she needed someone tall enough to reach shit lol. Her husband died in a car wreck a number of years ago and she lives in a fairly smally town. I'm sure the biggest appeal is I didn't know his/her friends and vice versa. She asked me out but you take what you can get. Her son is a senior in college and totally out of the house.

A number of my friends that got divorced act like when they find someone to date it will be like being married all over after the first week. Dress like shit, come home from work and sit on the couch watching TV till bedtime. Do something together? Shit no I work for a living and am tired fuck that. Just a guess but acting like someone retired or has been married to the person for 30 years is not a big turn on.

Foler · Apr 13, 2023

Daidraco said:
Maybe my 2 cents will help cause I didnt really mean to click this thread. You have to find common ground with a girl you like. If you're simping over some girl, then you have to find the things she does and find joy in them yourself. If she likes hiking and posts pictures of that shit, then go find a trail on your own and breathe some fucking fresh air. Do this often. If she's a Gym rat - then go find a gym you like and do your best to get in shape. If she likes water sports, dont let broke hold you back - you dont need a boat. Go do white water rafting and/or kayaking. If she likes fear sports like Skydiving - go do that shit yourself. Get trained for it so you dont need to have a babysitter on your back. etc. etc.

Most of this shit is easy, even for older folks. But if you really get down to the brass tax here - if you dont like none of this shit and she does, why would you ever think she is going to date you? Or, on the other side of this coin - If she doesnt like you even though you find this stuff interesting and fun then by extension you'll eventually meet a girl that does like you that you find attractive. The life events of the original girl that lead her to liking those activities put her where she is and its molded her look and personality to be something that you find attractive - so youll find another girl that has those same features doing that and she may like you.

If you're afraid to talk to a specific girl, or just get anxious as fuck around her - then you need to work that out yourself. There is something about yourself that keeps you from being "you" around that girl and even though its looked down upon, a therapist is your best friend. Mental Issue.

Lastly, if you're getting dates just fine but none of the women you're going on dates with interest you.. You need to go see a doctor about low testosterone. Not joking, its a real thing that men in our age range deal with. Health issue.

Ive went through ALL the above. I didnt get the girl I was after. She married a millionaire and they live in Australia now. But I did get in shape. I did find an activity/hobby I like doing. My life is better because of those two things which indirectly helped me make more money so I can do more stuff. Which indirectly let me find the girl Im with now, for the past 6 years. Longest relationship Ive ever had.

I knew I had low T from the docs and going to the Gym helped me out tremendously with that issue. As far as a therapist goes, I had a lot of issues from my childhood and the military when it came to dating, what dating represents, marriage, children etc. and Im still working through a lot of those things. She helped me recognize my self worth which helped me overcome the anxiety I would get around the girl that I was simping for originally. Now shes working on helping me with commitment, and the issues that are a reflection of my parents issues when it comes to marriage and children.

All in all - get healthy guys. Even if you're an ugly fuck, if you go to the gym often enough - she'll look at your muscles instead.

Random question. It sounds like your therapist is female? Curious how that’s played out.

Foler · Apr 13, 2023

Foler · Apr 13, 2023

Daidraco said:
You have to keep in mind that a Doctor is going to have a wide range for what is an acceptable amount of Testosterone. Ask for it or go to other doctors until you get it. Once you have it - see what changes in your life and if you like how it changes your life.

As far as what you said about your ex - just sounds like you're still hung up on her.

Curious what T levels our forum test bros are at? Very skeptical of medical “accepted levels”. We’ve seen how medical community shifts around tolerances for what is healthy on the fly to fit some bullshit narrative (hi Covid)

Foler · Apr 13, 2023

Animosity said:
Ya dont use 4 year old photos. If its not within the last 1.5 years dont use it. Especially if you look significantly different. Definitely had the dates where the girl uses old photos and shows up 30+ lbs heavier.

Theres some good dating advice podcasts/youtubers out there like Tripp Advice.

Majority of women I went on online dates with used old photos or angles. Maybe the worst was one that used 10 year old photos. Wondered why she looked weathered as fuck the first date. Snooped around and found her dating profile pic 10 years ago on her social media…

Rajaah · Apr 13, 2023

Foler said:
Majority of women I went on online dates with used old photos or angles. Maybe the worst was one that used 10 year old photos. Wondered why she looked weathered as fuck the first date. Snooped around and found her dating profile pic 10 years ago on her social media…

Yeah, literally all of the women I've met from dating apps are either 5 years older or 40 pounds heavier than their pictures. Literally all of them. I'm racking my brain trying to think of even one who wasn't. Well, there was this one Jordanian woman who looked exotic and had tremendous boobs and actually matched her pictures pretty well, maybe only 20 pounds heavier IRL. She asked me to go down on her and then cuddle and then get out when asked, without any reciprocation or anything else, and I respected her audacity. One of the few I liked from there and it went absolutely nowhere of course. Also had the most awkward moment I've ever had on a date when I went to kiss her goodnight and she just sort of ducked around it like a boxer and said she doesn't like emotional attachment, so I just kissed her on the forehead. Was weird as absolute fuck. I didn't call her again and vice versa.

I don't know if I'm too good looking, or not good looking enough. Cause I've had plenty of women not be interested at first glance despite my efforts. Yet other women have told me that I was intimidating to ask out because of how good I looked, or that they had trouble with me because I was so good-looking and nice to them that they were catching feelings and didn't want to, weird stuff like that.

I honestly have no goddamn clue what I actually am on a 1-10 and I'm certainly not gonna post the question to the room so people can pick apart my choice of socks or something.

Foler · Apr 13, 2023

Rajaah said:
Yeah, literally all of the women I've met from dating apps are either 5 years older or 40 pounds heavier than their pictures. Literally all of them. I'm racking my brain trying to think of even one who wasn't. Well, there was this one Jordanian woman who looked exotic and had tremendous boobs and actually matched her pictures pretty well, maybe only 20 pounds heavier IRL. She asked me to go down on her and then cuddle and then get out when asked, without any reciprocation or anything else, and I respected her audacity. One of the few I liked from there and it went absolutely nowhere of course. Also had the most awkward moment I've ever had on a date when I went to kiss her goodnight and she just sort of ducked around it like a boxer and said she doesn't like emotional attachment, so I just kissed her on the forehead. Was weird as absolute fuck. I didn't call her again and vice versa.

I don't know if I'm too good looking, or not good looking enough. Cause I've had plenty of women not be interested at first glance despite my efforts. Yet other women have told me that I was intimidating to ask out because of how good I looked, or that they had trouble with me because I was so good-looking and nice to them that they were catching feelings and didn't want to, weird stuff like that.

I honestly have no goddamn clue what I actually am on a 1-10 and I'm certainly not gonna post the question to the room so people can pick apart my choice of socks or something.

Online dating is a complete waste. As

Big Phoenix has pointed out many times before, statistics don’t add up in any man’s favor. It’s a complete grift and has ruined dating culture. Add to the fact exactly what you said - women’s pics are 99% of the time misleading on those apps.

Daidraco · Apr 13, 2023

Foler said:
Online dating is a complete waste. As Big Phoenix has pointed out many times before, statistics don’t add up in any man’s favor. It’s a complete grift and has ruined dating culture. Add to the fact exactly what you said - women’s pics are 99% of the time misleading on those apps.

According to some random poll I saw, "A person is likely to lie about themselves within the first 8 steps of a dating profile." So of course I wouldnt be looking for a long term relationship out of anything online. eHarmony and shit like that seems super wasteful to me, as well. I want to know where the woman I date is naturally. What she does from day to day. Had enough random hookups with women in the Army. If I was single, I wouldnt turn one down - but its not what I would be looking for.

Foler said:
Random question. It sounds like your therapist is female? Curious how that’s played out.

Therapist is a woman. I met her when I started attending a new church. Shes a muscular woman thats got me going to the gym with her and her husband. He's a fucking beast of a dude that works for the city as a fireman. Her degree came from Liberty, so I would rank her very low on the indoctrination / cut your dick off scale. Both of them are the type of people that I aspired to be when I was growing up - not necessarily their job, but the lifestyle they lead. As a man, I just dont think I would let my guard down mentally as much as I do with her. Her therapist style is zero drugs, which is another reason I stuck with her.

I used to have this old doctor I could talk to when I needed advice. Guy was always trying to get me to do better. After he died, I realized that he was mentoring me and I really miss that. Something that is truly hard to find.

Cad · Apr 14, 2023

Rajaah said:
Yeah, literally all of the women I've met from dating apps are either 5 years older or 40 pounds heavier than their pictures. Literally all of them. I'm racking my brain trying to think of even one who wasn't. Well, there was this one Jordanian woman who looked exotic and had tremendous boobs and actually matched her pictures pretty well, maybe only 20 pounds heavier IRL. She asked me to go down on her and then cuddle and then get out when asked, without any reciprocation or anything else, and I respected her audacity. One of the few I liked from there and it went absolutely nowhere of course. Also had the most awkward moment I've ever had on a date when I went to kiss her goodnight and she just sort of ducked around it like a boxer and said she doesn't like emotional attachment, so I just kissed her on the forehead. Was weird as absolute fuck. I didn't call her again and vice versa.

I don't know if I'm too good looking, or not good looking enough. Cause I've had plenty of women not be interested at first glance despite my efforts. Yet other women have told me that I was intimidating to ask out because of how good I looked, or that they had trouble with me because I was so good-looking and nice to them that they were catching feelings and didn't want to, weird stuff like that.

I honestly have no goddamn clue what I actually am on a 1-10 and I'm certainly not gonna post the question to the room so people can pick apart my choice of socks or something.

How is this possible? I haven't gained 20 pounds in 20 years. If they've gained 20 pounds in 5 years, they're going to be 100 pounds overweight in 15-20 years? How old are these chicks? Are they just all fat?

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