embarrassing/odd unplanned sex moments.

Fuck. My post should have said before leaving to go to the gym. Pretty sure they'd kick me out for fucking her on the bench.

I can't remember much more that was interesting.

Had an experience a year ago in a national park in NC where I fucked this girl maybe 20 feet from where an Indian family was picnicking. Got me so hot that I managed to get hard and go again. She was a freak. Swallowed both times like some starved porn star. Completely spur of the moment.

Not me, but when the house next to me was being built the electrician was putting in some Saturday time. I came out on my front porch and he had his skanky...like meth skanky...whore legs up in the front of his ranger going to town on her in the driveway of this half completed house. It was like 10am.

Ah. Also messed around with this chick who was a mom one time. For awhile I thought I'd felt my first nuvaring, but that's what my gf uses now and it definitely wasn't it. It was hard plastic. Maybe metal ring in the vagina. I think it may have been a vaginal support or mesh. She was a bit tubby (I guess I was hogging) and maybe had some vaginal prolapse issues due to weak muscles. I don't know.

I don't think I have any embarrassing stories. I don't find any of them odd either.

I fucked a woman for a while that "squirted" (probably peed) every time she climaxed. The first time it happened she was on top and she started to shake violently and moan like crazy, she lifted herself off my cock and about a half quart of liquid shot out of her pussy over the course of about 10 seconds in a very powerful stream. This happened every time she climaxed. It happened once in (well, more like at) my mouth. I was OK with it.

I was at a house in Vermont with a bunch of friends for a long weekend and ended up fucking one of the girls that was up there. We were drunk and fucking like crazy and everyone could hear us so one of my buddies decided to run into the room butt ass naked and "scare" us. She jumped off the side of the bed like a goddamn ninja, never have I seen someone react that fast. I just laughed, he left, she jumped right back on. Same girl same weekend, we were fucking on top of the hot tub which was indoors in the basement in a room with glass doors. At least three people came around the corner and saw us then walked back out. This time she didn't give a fuck and we never stopped going at it.

On a first date one time I was making out with the girl in an empty parking lot after the bar closed. It was on a major road and the place closed early (11pm or so). While cars were passing by she started to undo my pants. I said "let's go back to my place". She said "Not on the first date, that's too slutty". I figured OK I'm not getting any tonight. Then she kept trying to take my pants off so I threw her into the back seat. She gave me some of the best head I've ever gotten with the door wide open and every passing car able to see what was going on inside. She loved giving head so much she orgasmed while doing it (while she was rubbing herself). Same girl was really fucking noisy and when I told her she needed to quiet down because my tenants have kids and they can hear everything she told me to shove her panties in her mouth. So I did, and used the strings as handles for leverage. She was fucking nuts.

I had gone on a few dates with a woman some mutual friends had tried to hook me up with. All she did was talk about how she doesn't need a man because she has her cats. I said OK have fun with your cats. She wanted to be friends though so she invited me to her birthday a week or so later. I went and ended up taking one of her friends home. A 40 year old 4' 9" recently divorced mom. I was so drunk I kept falling asleep. That didn't stop her, she kept waking me up. Finally after the third time I decided I needed to do something to stay awake. So I flipped her over and just shoved my dick into her ass. She loved it. The next day cat lady wanted to see me again, so I fucked her that night. Also in the ass. Neither one of them required lube.

Women are fucking stupid. I had gone on a couple dates with a nurse who was smoking fucking hot. One of the hottest women I've ever had the pleasure of touching naked. After one of the dates we were back at my place getting into it. Clothes started coming off so I picked her up and started to carry her into my bedroom. When we got to the door she said "Not the bedroom, I feel like that's slutty". Again, I thought I wasn't getting any. So we went back into my living room which has a huge bay window and transparent curtains. So the bedroom, the least slutty room in any house, was a no go for her but fucking in front of the bay window that everyone could see into (it was around 3pm) was A-OK.

I had an on again off again relationship with a woman for a while who loved anal sex. The first time we did that was her birthday. I had taken her out and after we went back to my place. I decided I wanted to fuck on a new air mattress I had just bought. She asked me to put it in her ass so naturally I obliged. After we were done there was blood all over the air mattress. I figured she had her period and that's why she wanted me to put it in her pooper. Whatever, period blood doesn't bother me. But that wasn't correct. I had been fucking her so hard that the air mattress had ripped the skin off her knees and elbows. She never stopped me. She just let it happen and bled all over my brand new air mattress.

Current gf likes to be choked, and so did my ex. I think we are on to something here boys

Have yet to be with a woman who stopped me when I was lightly choking her. Many of them grab my hands and squeeze harder.

Me and my ex were on a couch at her place, she started to unzip my pants and started to massage my dick with her mouth (she was on her side). A few moments after i thought could hold but....i couldn't and farted a little. She stopped blowing, pissed off and saying "wtf is wrong is with you?". I don't know why but i bursted out laughing.

Same ex. Taking shower together and were experiment anal sex. I started to insert my dick in the pooper but she wasn't lubed enough.Dumb as rock (newbie in anal sex), i kept going even with shampoo and shower gels in hand.
And then i saw blood on the bathtub floor. I was like "wtf? Was i so rough and now she's bleeding?".
WRONG! It was a cut on my dick (maybe due to friction). She started to panic, although i was calm, holding my dick and thinking "i'm such an idiot" lol

Cut dick by anal is a new one for me. I got a bad scratch once from a handjob stroke gone awry in hs. That sucks too.

Alright. Tonight I'm going to give my current much tamer gf a light choke. I'll report back.

Caeden_sl said:

Cut dick by anal is a new one for me. I got a bad scratch once from a handjob stroke gone awry in hs. That sucks too.

Alright. Tonight I'm going to give my current much tamer gf a light choke. I'll report back.

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Just putting your hands around her neck and not applying pressure is enough for some girls to go hog wild

Friction cuts are very common when you don't have proper lubrication, they can happen with vaginal as well. Yet another reason anal sex is dangerous (open cuts in a bacteria rich environment? Yeah) if not done correctly. Actually one of the primary reasons anal sex puts you at a higher risk for HIV transmission.

So, use lube for anal. Silicone based lube preferably.

I may seem like a hopeless pervert, but that's because I am. I do nearly everything she asks, except for poo, pain, blood and back-handed badminton. As such, nothing really embarrasses me.

I won't outline the sexual encounter, but it was something she really wanted...dreamed of, really. Dreamed of for years.

I'm not embarrassed because I did it, but I am embarrassed because I loved doing it....and it got my girlfriend's rocks off so hard that she lost sympathetic eye movement.

One of the things I'm least proud of is breaking up with a girl in the middle of a blow job. I mean who does that? I should have at least been a gentleman and allowed her to finish, and then broken up with her. But nope, not me. I was so turned off by her (I was going out with her only because I'd had a long dry spell, and some girl friends of hers pressured me into it) that I couldn't allow things to continue. right then and there. Admittedly my timing was not good. Needless to say the story was shared with her friends, and I was blacklisted for the rest of the summer. Still feel a twinge of guilt about that...and must have been very embarrassing for her.

Jazser_sl said:

One of the things I'm least proud of is breaking up with a girl in the middle of a blow job. I mean who does that? I should have at least been a gentleman and allowed her to finish, and then broken up with her. But nope, not me. I was so turned off by her (I was going out with her only because I'd had a long dry spell, and some girl friends of hers pressured me into it) that I couldn't allow things to continue. right then and there. Admittedly my timing was not good. Needless to say the story was shared with her friends, and I was blacklisted for the rest of the summer. Still feel a twinge of guilt about that...and must have been very embarrassing for her.

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Holy shit, that is ice cold. You really couldn't close your eyes and pretend she was one of her friends? You're lucky your penis is still attached to your body.

Haast_sl said:

Holy shit, that is ice cold. You really couldn't close your eyes and pretend she was one of her friends?You're lucky your penis is still attached to your body.

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I thought he was going to write "Needless to say, she bit off my dick..." lol

Haast_sl said:

Holy shit, that is ice cold. You really couldn't close your eyes and pretend she was one of her friends?You're lucky your penis is still attached to your body.

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I thought he was going to write "Needless to say, she bit off my dick..." lol

Remembered another story. not embarrassing but painful.
Me and my ex were at her aunt's house. We were alone and went to a room upstairs. Started to fool around, clothes off and then humping like freaks.
5-10 minutes later, her aunt arrives. I was going to stop but my ex said to continue and so i did.
I went missionary (she loved that position) and when she was about to moan really loud, she bit my shoulder hard, really really REALLY hard, to the point of almost bleeding. I immediately stopped, my dick went flaccid in seconds. She started to apologize and i said "there was a fucking pillow right on your side". She continue to apologize and i went to put some shit to heal the bite and both got dressed.
Got downstairs, her aunt asked us if we wanted to use the pool in the backyard. Needless to say, i said i was not in the mood and thinking "is it too odd to go swimming with my shirt on?" lol

I could see the choking thing going very bad the first time you tried it if the girl didn't like it. I'm close to getting engaged and we've done pretty much everything but that, and getting tied up. She's a "nice girl", but that hasn't stopped her from enjoying buttsecks fairly often. But choking? That might be hard to explain if she asked what the heck I was trying to do.

Maybe I can try it from behind first and just extend my fingers around towards the front more, then if if anything goes 'weird' I can just say I was massaging her neck.

Several years ago I went out on a date with this chick who had gotten out of an LTR two months ago and started dating again so needless to say she was pretty frisky. We ended up going back to her place. She sees her roommate's car in the driveway and assures me she is always out on Friday with her boyfriend, they must have just taken his car. Sure enough, everything is dark in the apartment so we grab a few drinks and later go at it as if no one is home. Afterwards, she says the closest trash is in the bathroom, so I go around the corner into the hall and immediately into the bathroom. It's one of these really long weird New England addition rooms, so the toilet is in this weird partial recess down past a mini hallway that connects the sink and laundry with the shower and toilet. I was kind of tired and a little buzzed still. I toss the condom in the trash and I go to wash my face off in the sink real quick. As I'm standing straight wiping my face off and turn the faucet off, I get freaked the fuck out because I hear something in the bathroom and I know the chick and her cat are both in the bedroom. I look over and see her roommate is sitting on the toilet (entire seat down) in her night gown sobbing quietly. She'd obviously been in the apartment the entire time we were screwing around (and screwing). I just said 'uhh, hey, how's it going?' and she starts fucking wailing and bawling her eyes out, obviously something fucked up had happened (or just broke up with BF or something). I quickly said my goodbyes after that and shuttled my ass home.

I, along with my then-girlfriend, her mother and younger brother were visiting her older sister at Penn State. It was the first time I had seen any of them, including my girlfriend, in about two months, and we were posted up in a pretty crappy hotel room a few miles off campus.

My girlfriend and I were in one bed, and her mother and brother were in the other. It's about 11 at night, and everyone is starting to pass out from a long, busy day. The TV is on, letting off a steady glow, but the volume is borderline muted. I'm starting to doze off, when suddenly I feel my girlfriend start to reach down my pants while simultaneously shimmying off her panties. I was hard instantaneously, and she was already soaking wet, so I just slipped inside like butter. We were in the spoon position, and both looking directly at her mother and brother. It was simultaneously exhilarating, creepy, and terrifying. Needless to say I came pretty much instantly, but I didn't have a condom on and she wasn't on the pill, so I had to do one of those "Oh shit oh shit oh shit" pull out and desperately cup my hand over my dick to try to keep from squirting everywhere deals. Jizz is blasting through the cracks in my fingers, spilling all over my stomach, so I ninja-rolled off the side of the bed farthest from her family, grabbed my tshirt, wrapped it around my dick, and military-crawled into the bathroom to clean up. Her family was none the wiser.


Also, just last week, my girlfriend and I were swimming in the ocean (calm waters) and started to get frisky out of nowhere. We were a good ways out, with nobody near us. She was jerking me while I was diddling her. I pushed her bathing suit to the side and started casually fucking her.

Then, out of the corner of my eye, I see this older woman along with two small children start making their way in our direction. There was like 4,000 feet of beach, and of all the places they could go, they start heading directly towards us. I'm like "WTF? Are you serious right now?", so I start banging my girlfriend harder. I'm desperately trying to cum, racing against this mom and her kids. They're getting closer and closer, and I keep losing my rhythm because I'm holding my girlfriend up while also getting hit with little waves.

At this point the woman is so close that I can see the pattern on her bathing suit, but I refuse blue balls, so I just locked my knees and rapidly jackhammered by girlfriend. Her eyes rolled back and she came hard, and that put me over the edge. I filled her up with a fantastically awful combination of cum and seawater, just as this woman made eye contact with me. My girlfriend and I just stood there, squatting, unmoving, my dick still inside her, as this woman and her two little kids walked past us. I waved at them, smiled and said "hello" just as I went soft and slipped out. It was awful and fucking hot as hell at the same time.