Wait ... so you send the package to the other chick knowing full well it"s creepy and find the bitch to be "crazy" if she likes it and respond back?rangoth said:
I"m confused as fuck right now.
Girls who broke your heart thread
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I"m confused as fuck right now.
Rangoth
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Im saying I understand those of you claiming I am creepy and that my methods of courtship are unorthodox! I don"t think it"s creepy, I think it"s sweet, fun, and considerate. Again, I am an unusual fellow in general and I understand this. When I go out to bars or local events and flirt girls are always taken back when the number exchange goes down and I tell them I don"t carry a cellphone(I really don"t). They think that I am lying and don"t like them or whatever and then a date never even forms out of it...doesn"t phase me though...I"m gonna keep on keepin" on with my creepy and unusual self.Tenks said:
And the munchkin(different girl by the way) would like the package because she really likes me. The "crazy bitches" comment was just playing off the conversation with you forum peoples! She"s a pretty nice girl, but she is of the type that would completely fawn over a package with any contents(almost).
I understand what you"re saying, "I"m weird and unorthodox and if I want to send a girl a package immediately... if she"s the girl for me, she will love it without fail." So you"re going to keep on, batting a low average until you stumble on "the one". Eh, I suppose that"s one way of going about it, we"re merely saying that it"s a time issue. Why not give yourself every advantage you can with a girl youdon"twant to fail on and wait a while? Even munchkin girl, despite liking you a lot now, may have thought you sending her a package in the beginning would be creepy (assuming that you did like her like that). Gifts in person is one thing (Eomer can tell you all about kimonos), but actually mailing it to her? That"s a step beyond the casual nature of the relationships.
It"s like you"re a premature ejaculator... of love.
It"s like you"re a premature ejaculator... of love.
Oh god you actually gave her the Kimono? I thought just about everyone on this forum told you not to do that? Fuck why do I even post here no one listens to me.
Oh yeah and this romantic ideal of true love/soul mates is a crock of shit. Eventually you"ll find a girl who you can put up with and puts up with you and it just works. It"s not always gumdrops and rainbows. I honestly don"t know any girl unless she is seriously mentally fucked that would think "Oh I just had a nice first date with that guy hopefully he sends me a stuffed duck filled with rose petals so I know he"s also interested in me!"
Oh yeah and this romantic ideal of true love/soul mates is a crock of shit. Eventually you"ll find a girl who you can put up with and puts up with you and it just works. It"s not always gumdrops and rainbows. I honestly don"t know any girl unless she is seriously mentally fucked that would think "Oh I just had a nice first date with that guy hopefully he sends me a stuffed duck filled with rose petals so I know he"s also interested in me!"
Please tell me she was confused on how to tie the obi/cord and not the actual "put it on like a fucking bathrobe" concept.
{edit}: Even then it"s a matter of following diagrams. Any 7-year-old Boy Scout can tie a knot; I"d hope two grown women could do it too. >.<
{edit}: Even then it"s a matter of following diagrams. Any 7-year-old Boy Scout can tie a knot; I"d hope two grown women could do it too. >.<
Rangoth
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I love the analogy I might even use that. And I would have given her something in person(something different) but she lives far away, mailing is really my only option except for the times we visit one another. As I mentioned before, this girl was NOT a random meet and then boom I mail shit or whatever. We have plans to hit up Yosemite and shit later this year, and I will probably see her in July if our business travel lines up. Was the gift creepy or premature? Clearly you guys think so. But, just so people see what"s going through my head, I figured we are apart and phone calls and texts are lame(I am completely against internet social groups and shit like that) so I should send her a little something to brighten the day. If it didn"t work that sucks, but I"ve lost no sleep.Alcestis said:
And yea, I do bat a low average in relationships. I have tons of relationships, but none of them end up going beyond a week or two because I realize I don"t like anything about her except her body, then I get bored and ignore her until it just fades away.
At some point during the last 2-3 years of "dating" I"ve just become jaded or annoyed with the entire process. I flirt, spend money, see if it will work and then I find out 2 months later she"s not for me. Only now I"m out 2k and wasted 2 months. I guess I developed a "fuck that" attitude.
Now I just act like the same floppy, outgoing, goofy, odd-ball and see who bites.
Eomer
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Something about tieing cords and cinching the thing up, since if you wore it like a bathrobe it would be way too long. I don"t think they tried all that hard. And it did come with pictorial directions.Alcestis said:
haha, I thought I had mentioned that I had, I guess not. Yeah, I gave it to her about a month after we were officially a couple, and she was quite thrilled about it. At least she appeared to be. She mentioned it a couple times afterwards as well, and as I said, seemed quite pleased with it. But that was right in the middle of the honeymoon phase where everything was sunshine and lollipops.Tenks said:
And just because I or others don"t follow exactly what"s being given as advice here doesn"t mean we"re not reading it and making use of it. As I said, I"m slowly learning this shit!
Yeah sorry Eomer I admit I generally don"t read about people"s lollipops and rainbows stories I generally just come in here to offer first-step dating advice and attraction building. You probably said something and I didn"t read it.
Rangoth
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It wasn"t a first date but whatever.Tenks said:
And I"m not even looking for a fucking soul mate. But I would like someone I can match with on more than the fact my penis feels good in her vagina. The "munchkin" is a nice girl, tolerates anything I do, is adorable, no serious flaws or anything, but I just don"t like her. So to say that I should just find that and deal is the fucking path to divorce, misery or uncomfort.
You are aware you can be yourself but you can also be yourself to a limit, right? I am nevernotmyself around girls on the first few dates but I make sure to reel back some of my sarcasm, shady past and sometimes over affection. I"m the kind of guy who can fall in love with a girl on the first date but there is no way in hell I"m going to tell her that.
Hell even with my current girlfriend who I love very, very much and have since about the first month we dated I waited 6 months before even dropping that language. She started saying it around month 4 but I just dodged the "I love you" back. I think it is just not very smart to try, fail and try the exact thing again. Learn from your mistakes and grow. No one is saying to abandon your adorable gift and date ideas but simply put a cap on them. Girls can feel very uncomfortable if you put them on a pedestal and feel like you hold them in such high regard. They start to disbelieve that they can attain this and feel alot of pressure to and eventually will just break up with you because of it.
The exact reason my last girlfriend broke up with me? "You are too perfect." That is the exact line. It is because I put her on a pedestal, was always available and was an overall bleeding vagina. I always thought I"d find the perfect girl who would love all of that but the fact of the matter if I maintained that path I would have alienated every girl I ever met. My last girlfriend was into me insanely when we first met and started dating and I just chopped myself down into a nothing in her eyes by horrible actions. Learn from this and understand why she lost interest in you.
Hell even with my current girlfriend who I love very, very much and have since about the first month we dated I waited 6 months before even dropping that language. She started saying it around month 4 but I just dodged the "I love you" back. I think it is just not very smart to try, fail and try the exact thing again. Learn from your mistakes and grow. No one is saying to abandon your adorable gift and date ideas but simply put a cap on them. Girls can feel very uncomfortable if you put them on a pedestal and feel like you hold them in such high regard. They start to disbelieve that they can attain this and feel alot of pressure to and eventually will just break up with you because of it.
The exact reason my last girlfriend broke up with me? "You are too perfect." That is the exact line. It is because I put her on a pedestal, was always available and was an overall bleeding vagina. I always thought I"d find the perfect girl who would love all of that but the fact of the matter if I maintained that path I would have alienated every girl I ever met. My last girlfriend was into me insanely when we first met and started dating and I just chopped myself down into a nothing in her eyes by horrible actions. Learn from this and understand why she lost interest in you.
How I read it initially, sounds so bad.Eomer said:
I met my fiancee online and sent her flowers at the five month mark or so. We"ve been living together for almost four years now. She thought it was sweet and we weren"t even technically in a relationship yet (waiting till we met in person).
I think it really depends on the girl. Mine, for instance, has her own stationary. She LOVES getting real letters, or anything in the mail that isn"t junk/bills. If she got a package like that her response would be a few days, because she"d have to mail the thank you note.
I had an idea which may have been posted, I didn"t read everyone"s yet.
To kind of get your "creepy" out & avoid urges to send things until you"re in a formal relationship, why not start out simple?
Like bring a flower (or a few) to pick her up on a date. I am pretty sure that"s acceptable, or at least better than mailing something that soon. I would avoid plush presents for dates unless you can make some light of it. For example, I like cows - so if I got a silly looking plush cow (that you saw at a gas station or something ((lie if you need to)) not very "out of your way ) that would be less threatening than a cow showered in rose petals on my doorstep.
Once you"re in an established relationship, I think that"s fine for girls who like it (as long as it"s not excessive). I have a feeling you"re going to be used as an example. Someone will post asking how to get rid of a girl, then someone else will reply; "Send herThe Package"
Edit: Changed Box to Package. Boxes are for dicks.
To kind of get your "creepy" out & avoid urges to send things until you"re in a formal relationship, why not start out simple?
Like bring a flower (or a few) to pick her up on a date. I am pretty sure that"s acceptable, or at least better than mailing something that soon. I would avoid plush presents for dates unless you can make some light of it. For example, I like cows - so if I got a silly looking plush cow (that you saw at a gas station or something ((lie if you need to)) not very "out of your way ) that would be less threatening than a cow showered in rose petals on my doorstep.
Once you"re in an established relationship, I think that"s fine for girls who like it (as long as it"s not excessive). I have a feeling you"re going to be used as an example. Someone will post asking how to get rid of a girl, then someone else will reply; "Send herThe Package"
Edit: Changed Box to Package. Boxes are for dicks.
Ronaan
Molten Core Raider
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Oh man am I ever in the same fucking boat...Eomer said:
Saw Steph at the climbing gym today, and everything was just like before we were a couple. Weak knees included. Fuck.
Did some small-talk, told her the new haircut isn"t as nice as her old one was (hah!), got "friend"-hugs as a greeting and goodbye.
Still hurt some looking at her, but it wasn"t as bad as I had expected. I actually believe seeing her will help me getting over her, somewhat.
Still I"ve spent hours of lying awake in the last 2 weeks, thinking of her. Comes and goes in waves, just like you said.
Eomer
Trakanon Raider
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Well uh, if you had never met her in person and had been chatting online for 5 months, then I"d say your relationship experience at least in that particular case has zero practical use for anyone in a more traditional dating setting.Aulirophile said:
No offense, but that shit is just weird IMO, chatting with someone online for so long before even having met them. Just seems completely bizarre to me.
Again though, I would even save a small bouquet until things are reasonably well established. I gave Chuck flowers pretty early on in our brief relationship, and while she was thrilled when I gave them to her and had them as her Facebook profile pic pretty much the second she got home with them, we all know what happened within a week or two: crushing disinterest.Ravvenn said:
Chicks are fucking strange.
To each their own, I think that"s the worst kind of torture personally. It would only serve to extend my feelings, because you"re satisfying just a teeny tiny wee little bit of your desire to be with her by occasionally seeing her, just enough to keep those feelings around or at least slow their fading. It"s like a heroin addict still taking the occasional hit because it makes them feel better temporarily: it"s not really helping the root cause.Ronaan said:
Back to me for a quick livejournal update: after Anne broke up with me Saturday night we texted back and forth a few times, just mostly reiterating what had already been said: I was disappointed things didn"t work out, I thought that she wasn"t giving me a fair shake complaining about my jokes or comments, that I was shocked things had gone so sideways after going so well initially, that it was high time for things to go one way or the other, that I wasn"t mad and so on. She mostly just said "I"m sorry" over and over again, that she didn"t think things would turn out as they had, that she DID still "care" about me. I joked that I was disappointed that I didn"t even get any break-up or make-up sex over the past month. She just said "I"m sorry" for about the 8th time. That was from about 1:20-1:40am that night.
The next day she texted me, again saying she was sorry about calling the previous night and having called so late and that she hated to ask and totally understood if I was pissed or didn"t want to, but she wanted to know what I was going to do with the extra weekend past for Folk Fest that I had bought and if she could still buy it from me (they"re sold out now). I responded that I had assumed she still wanted the ticket and hadn"t earmarked it for anyone else as everyone I knew had already bought their tickets, and that I had just figured we"d be in touch once things had settled out a bit and we could figure it out then. She said great, thanks so much.
Then we went back to talking about "things" again for several more texts, much the same as before. Her saying she never expected things to turn out like this, that she enjoyed our time together and was sorry etc. I again repeated that I wasn"t mad, that it was simply a shitty situation that I had to deal with, but that I was gonna be a little bit of a baby for the next while and would be removing her from Facebook if only to lessen the temptation to stalk her. She said no worries, do whatever I need to do, and that"s about it. No contact since.
It"ll be interesting to see how things go when we meet up to exchange the concert tickets in a few weeks.
Should be the "girls who made me grow a vagina thread". If someone could just paste together "one" persons comments in this thread you would see more flip-flopping than John Kerry. It"s like Oprah for dudes! Unfortunately, that is how these things usually go. They are as stupid as shit when you look back.. but god do they suck when it"s actually happening.
Rangoth
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I"m with you 100%, I would never do something like that on a date. But I am the type of guy to show up with a single rose or whatever. I literally bought said plush duck next door to my house and the flowers next door to my work. The entire thing cost 20$ and 15 minutes.Ravvenn said:
I hope I get to be a new FoH meme!!!!!