Dianetics08 said:
Ok, so I will admit I don"t like him for the obvious reason that he is the ex, but I still think objectively that she was out of his league. She doesn"t hate on him really, they are still friends, she just says that he was too controlling as a boyfriend. The only times she has complained about him was when she explained why they broke up and then if he acts like a dick towards her (which I suppose could be her spinning what really happened, but I"m fairly confident it isn"t). Here is the story I was told as to why they broke up: spring semester ended so they mainly talked to each other through IM"s. If she didn"t respond immediately to one of his IM"s, he would say stuff like "Why are you talking with somebody else? Am I not good enough?" and then one time when she was talking with one of her guy friends, he said "So are you gonna go and fuck him now?". That"s when she decided to end things. I"m willing to believe he was too controlling, especially since her roomie/best friend gave me a talking to about not controlling my gf and monopolizing her time like the ex did.
I don"t irrationally hate all her ex"s, I"ve actually talked with the other ex and thought he was pretty cool. It"s not like I feel threatened by either of the ex"s or anything like that. And if I"m drunk, I hope to be doing something better with my time than crying on the internet.
Sounds like her ex was ready for a more mature relationship and shes just interested in a fuck buddy. I always hated the friends of a girl trying to tell you not to monopolize her time; as if someone can control another person. They never realize its their friend that is choosing to spend time with their boyfriend instead of their girlfriends.
And if shes the one telling her friends "OMG HE WONT LET ME HANG OUT WITH YOU" then shes a fucking bitch. To me she sounds like she needs a few years of growing up before shes ready for a "real" relationship. Nothing is wrong with this, shes in college, this is the time for her to fuck up relationships - its a learning experience.
Honestly bro, you are head over heals for her. Just the line "but I still think objectively that she was out of his league" is proof enough. News flash, she was fucking the shit outa his dick for awhile so apparently she didnt think she was outa his league.. especially when she was gargling on his cum while it oozed off her chin onto her breasts.
Why do i say that? Because you are putting her on some fucking pedestal that she doesn"t need to be on. You are going to build her up to be this perfect girl in your mind and then when she decides she"s is bored of you it is going to rip your heart out and youw ill be back on here asking us "HOW DO I WIN HER BACK".
Not that it matters what i say.... everyone always does the same thing with their first relationship. I can"t stress enough that this situation is not unique; you did not find your soul mate; you are not perfect together. No two people are perfect for each other, its all about finding someone you enjoy being around and then making it work. Of course, it will only work if BOTH people are interested in a long-term relationship... and a girl that has friends bitching about her time being monopolized is NOT ready. If her friends are that immature she probably is too.
Enjoy the ride, i"m not saying it will definitely come to a horrible end, but it probably will. I personally think you would be better off preparing yourself for the end instead of living in some fantasy world where you think you just met the most amazing girl ever. Not only will it allow you to get over her when the time comes, but it will probably prolong the relationship since she won"t feel as if she conquered you.
But what do i know, i cant possibly fathom the feelings you guys have for each other. How she looks at you, or makes you feel. Its a match made in heaven, right? Straight out of a disney movie. Keep rationalizing with yourself. You seem like a nice guy, try not to get burned or you wil be as jaded as the rest of us!
