Antarius said:
Because this was only the second time I"d ever taken any girl to the movies (first time was after we"d already had sex) so I didn"t realize how stupid of an idea it would be.
First date with this girl was at a (wait for it) ... (lol).... Denny"s
So yea, terrible terrible date locations and completely my fault on both accounts, this girl has got to think I"m the stupidest date-picker-outer ever.
(going to see a movie was my idea as well as what movie to watch, what day to see it on, and what time to see it at)
She does seem a little conservative Wrathcaster. I"ve tried to steer cleer of religion and politics as per other advice in that it"s terrible first/second date material, but at one point the conversation did get dangerously close to politics talk and she mentioned how she hated people on welfare. (And I"m a definitely more than a little liberal despite the fact I make good money now and pay lots of taxes, I"m still very pro-union and think welfare works overall to improve everyone"s position in the world and I think that government can often do a better job than private enterprise at certain things (ex: Air Traffic Control)).
She did mention she"s gotten high only twice ever.
We didn"t drink on either date (obviously due to location), although we did talk a little about alcohol and she seemed to have quite a bit of experience despite only being 20. Otherwise, so far I"ve had far more luck with women sober and clear headed than I ever had when I was drinking regularly, so I"m not sure if it"s a good idea for me to start (at least until more comfortable with the girl).
So yea, I guess she is more conservative than me, but she also seems very passive, way less aggressive than most other girls I"ve known.
Like I said, I"ll try to ramp it up on the 3rd date (if there is even any interest from her in a 3rd date), but maybe you"re right about her just being a little more conservative than what I"m used to.
Dude wtf. Denny"s? Seriously? DENNY"S?!
Not trying to be harsh here, but that"s an easy way to make sure you will NOT get any, especially not on a first date. Hell, if a girl suggested we go to Denny"s I"d probably laugh in her face. Denny"s isn"t even that good to go to single. Personally, I"ve got to be wasted to even touch their food. But srsly... No more Denny"s, ok? I hope you at least paid for her whole $5 portion of the meal. Even still, you could have cooked her something decent spending less than you did at Denny"s if money is the problem. Do you know how to cook anything decent? Chicken is reasonably easy, even on a foreman. If she"s conservative she probably eats meat. Find out what she likes in casual conversation then make it for her without saying anything. If you can"t cook, go buy a cooking for dummies book or something. I was terrible at first, but started with rudimentary dishes and worked up from there. It"ll help you in the long run.
She probably doesn"t have the best impression of you by this point, but it may yet be salvageable. Conservative doesn"t always mean you don"t have a chance to get physical, and you being liberal doesn"t mean you can"t get involved. It just means you probably shouldn"t get into politics. Which isn"t a good idea at first anyway, but it"s helpful to subtly mention something going on in the world to get a clue. Conservatism usually implies some type of religious affiliation, in my experience. But once again, religion doesn"t necessarily cock block you either. Some of the freakiest girls I"ve met were avid church-goers.
Judging by the fact that she even went on a second date with you after the Denny"s incident she can"t have completely written you off, as that would be it for most chicks I"ve encountered. Following it up with a movie was almost as bad, but maybe she"s tame enough to where it doesn"t matter as much. If she still talks to you at all, you"ve probably got SOME chance.
Since she"s 20, you won"t be able to get her any sort of alcohol at most respectable places, and it doesn"t seem like she"d go for it anyway. If I were you, I"d invite her over for a casual dinner (that you make, or fake like you made it) and offer some wine (get white and red) casually. And don"t get drunk yourself. The object is to take the edge off, not to get wasted. That"s not what I meant. If you"re drunk and she isn"t, it"s usually going to end badly. Just mention it in passing, and if she agrees, ask her what she prefers then get her a glass.
You don"t have to start getting physical by going in for a kiss, either. From what you"ve posted, it seems as if you"re not very comfortable initiating that anyway, and if you"re not, chances are she"ll know it and it"ll only be more awkward. Awkward will ruin your shit. In my experience, starting with something subtle and harmless is a better way in than just going for the gold right away, at least on a girl like the one you describe. Some of my easiest lays have come from just making contact after making her laugh... If she reciprocates you"re probably in the clear.
You"ve got to show some confidence though. You"re already in a hole and you have to do something to make those past two awful decisions just a memory, and a faint one at that.
This is all shit that"s worked for me, though, and on certain types of women. Won"t work for everyone, and won"t work on every girl like that. No one is a total stereotype, but there are commonalities to work with.
But most of all, use some goddamn sense. You"re not going to get on anyone"s good side by taking them to Denny"s, ever. And if you do, run far, far away, they probably are a hooker. Unless you"re into that sort of thing.
Best of luck bro. Give it another shot maybe, prudes can be great in the sack.
