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Girls who broke your heart thread
- Thread starter Aychamo BanBan
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Also buy your GF a strap on to fuck it. Then it"ll be lol and it will also turn you on zeste. You know you"ll like it.
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Haha, what if you walked in and your gf is fucking a fleshlight in her ass with a dildo. Probably whats left of my brain would implode!nu_11 said:
When you give yourself a mind-shattering orgasm in the comfort of your own Fleshlight, maybe you"ll change your tune.
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Some of these girls amaze me they can even setup a myspace page. I don"t even know how to respond. I think I"ll imitate her capital text shit and see how that goes lol.
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YOU ARE TOO CUTE!CLOTHES DONT MEAN A THING TO ME BUT WOULD YOU BE MAD IF I CHANGED MY MIND??IM SOO HAVIND SECOND THOUGHTS....SILLY BOY!!LOL. BY THE WAY YOU MUST NOT REMEMBER ME TOO WELL,IM A LOUSY COOK!BUT, I SEE YOU GOT ALL THAT UNDER CONTROL?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Me]
Date: Nov 30, 2008 8:42 AM
Haha! You"ve already forgotten me? I guess the marriage was just too brief huh? What am I supposed to do with all of your clothes? And this closetful of shoes? Oh, the conversations were so great, your cooking superb, but the sex was only mediocre!
[Me]
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: kacey
Date: Nov 30, 2008 8:22 AM
you are crazy!who are you??
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Me]
Date: Nov 29, 2008 5:01 PM
After a rigorously brief overview of your profile I wanted to let you know I have already married and divorced you in my mind.
Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories... you will always have a special place in my heart.
Your ex-hubby,
[me]
PS I am going to need half your money according to our prenup
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YOU ARE TOO CUTE!CLOTHES DONT MEAN A THING TO ME BUT WOULD YOU BE MAD IF I CHANGED MY MIND??IM SOO HAVIND SECOND THOUGHTS....SILLY BOY!!LOL. BY THE WAY YOU MUST NOT REMEMBER ME TOO WELL,IM A LOUSY COOK!BUT, I SEE YOU GOT ALL THAT UNDER CONTROL?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Me]
Date: Nov 30, 2008 8:42 AM
Haha! You"ve already forgotten me? I guess the marriage was just too brief huh? What am I supposed to do with all of your clothes? And this closetful of shoes? Oh, the conversations were so great, your cooking superb, but the sex was only mediocre!
[Me]
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: kacey
Date: Nov 30, 2008 8:22 AM
you are crazy!who are you??
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [Me]
Date: Nov 29, 2008 5:01 PM
After a rigorously brief overview of your profile I wanted to let you know I have already married and divorced you in my mind.
Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories... you will always have a special place in my heart.
Your ex-hubby,
[me]
PS I am going to need half your money according to our prenup
tyen
EQ in a browser wait time: ____
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Either they stole the idea from here, or someone here made that site. I want 25% cut.Tyen said:
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I got a quick question for you guys. I recently found a very old (really my 1st) girlfriend, from like 7th grade on myspace. I emailed her and she responded. I wonder if I should talk to her like a normal boring person, or try to sarge her.
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Damn that shit works.
-----------------------------------------
From: me
Only when I"m being serious and expecting the same mentality from the other party I"m engaged in conversation with. This is not one of those cases.
Oh and I have syphilis, I"m uncircumsized, and I have a 3 inch wang.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:29 AM
haha, damn, you really dont scare do ya?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:27 AM
Thats cool, only body hair I shave is my chin and ankles.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:26 AM
well, i dont believe in shaving any body hair, but i keep it pretty clean
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:25 AM
I don"t scare easy. If you wanted to scare me, tell me you wanna have 20 kids with me but your religion forbids washing the private areas, so I better get used to the smell.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 10:32 AM
haha... that was supposed to scare you.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 10:28 AM
Oh hell yeah. I"m there. Only 20 kids? We get more government assistance with 24. They love that show, so you get a bonus. Can we name one gargamel? I love that guy.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 9:01 AM
tourettes? you"re right. we shouldnt have gotten divorced. lets go get remarried today. and after that we can start workin on the babies. i want atleast 20
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 8:57 AM
I"m really not quite sure, to be honest. In-laws maybe? And I think my tourettes got on your nerves, but overall it was a very good relationship. Maybe we should have stuck it out.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 7:45 AM
so why did we get divorced. it had to have been something you did because i dont cheat and ive never met a man crazy enough to leave me then again i couldnt have asked for the divorce either because i dont believe in them
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 12:29 PM
Well we were both pretty drunk when we signed it. And when we said our vows. And also when we bought the rings out of the machine at the front of wal-mart, too. But hey it was great while it lasted.
Sincerely,
Your ex-hubby
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 1:03 AM
haha. damn how long have i been drunk? cuz i know i would have never given away my money in a prenup.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 5:16 AM
After a rigorous perusal of your profile, I wanted to let you know I"ve already married and divorced you in my mind. Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories, you will always have a special place in my heart.
Sincerely, your ex-hubby.
PS: I am going to need half of your money according to our pre-nup .
Love,
Your ex-hubby
-----------------------------------------
From: me
Only when I"m being serious and expecting the same mentality from the other party I"m engaged in conversation with. This is not one of those cases.
Oh and I have syphilis, I"m uncircumsized, and I have a 3 inch wang.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:29 AM
haha, damn, you really dont scare do ya?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:27 AM
Thats cool, only body hair I shave is my chin and ankles.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:26 AM
well, i dont believe in shaving any body hair, but i keep it pretty clean
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 11:25 AM
I don"t scare easy. If you wanted to scare me, tell me you wanna have 20 kids with me but your religion forbids washing the private areas, so I better get used to the smell.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 10:32 AM
haha... that was supposed to scare you.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 10:28 AM
Oh hell yeah. I"m there. Only 20 kids? We get more government assistance with 24. They love that show, so you get a bonus. Can we name one gargamel? I love that guy.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 9:01 AM
tourettes? you"re right. we shouldnt have gotten divorced. lets go get remarried today. and after that we can start workin on the babies. i want atleast 20
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 8:57 AM
I"m really not quite sure, to be honest. In-laws maybe? And I think my tourettes got on your nerves, but overall it was a very good relationship. Maybe we should have stuck it out.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 7:45 AM
so why did we get divorced. it had to have been something you did because i dont cheat and ive never met a man crazy enough to leave me then again i couldnt have asked for the divorce either because i dont believe in them
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 12:29 PM
Well we were both pretty drunk when we signed it. And when we said our vows. And also when we bought the rings out of the machine at the front of wal-mart, too. But hey it was great while it lasted.
Sincerely,
Your ex-hubby
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: her
Date: Dec 2, 2008 1:03 AM
haha. damn how long have i been drunk? cuz i know i would have never given away my money in a prenup.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: me
Date: Dec 2, 2008 5:16 AM
After a rigorous perusal of your profile, I wanted to let you know I"ve already married and divorced you in my mind. Thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories, you will always have a special place in my heart.
Sincerely, your ex-hubby.
PS: I am going to need half of your money according to our pre-nup .
Love,
Your ex-hubby
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Is that a real conversations? That"s fucking odd dude!
I would say something like "Hey, you sound like you might actually be fun to hang out with in "real life". Shoot me your # and next time I"m doing something totally awesome I"ll give you a call and we can kick it."
I shot myself in my virtual foot a couple of days ago. I added one girl and gamed her with that line, she fell for it, and it turns out her friend is a nursing student who was doing some clinical rotations at the hospital I work at, and her friend is *hot* and had apparently told her about me a while back, that she thought I was nice looking or whatever. So I"m stuck with the girl who is cute too, but not as hot as the friend! Ah!
Which brings me to this: Girls - why don"t you approach guys if you find them attractive? Boy that would make shit so much easier. haha
Edit: Curious how many of you guys are getting phone #s and dates out of this. I"ve gotten a handful of numbers, and only met up with a couple of the girls so far. They all say the same thing "I never respond to messages on myspace, but your divorce thing was so funny/creepy/different."
I would say something like "Hey, you sound like you might actually be fun to hang out with in "real life". Shoot me your # and next time I"m doing something totally awesome I"ll give you a call and we can kick it."
I shot myself in my virtual foot a couple of days ago. I added one girl and gamed her with that line, she fell for it, and it turns out her friend is a nursing student who was doing some clinical rotations at the hospital I work at, and her friend is *hot* and had apparently told her about me a while back, that she thought I was nice looking or whatever. So I"m stuck with the girl who is cute too, but not as hot as the friend! Ah!
Which brings me to this: Girls - why don"t you approach guys if you find them attractive? Boy that would make shit so much easier. haha
Edit: Curious how many of you guys are getting phone #s and dates out of this. I"ve gotten a handful of numbers, and only met up with a couple of the girls so far. They all say the same thing "I never respond to messages on myspace, but your divorce thing was so funny/creepy/different."
Yeah, keep telling yourself that.
That"s your consolation prize. What you were really after was a girl who wanted nothing but to fuck your brains out every day for the rest of your life.
That"s your consolation prize. What you were really after was a girl who wanted nothing but to fuck your brains out every day for the rest of your life.