Girls who broke your heart thread

Ashes Emberblade said:

Pretty bummed. Fell in love. Made love. Now I can"t get enough of her. Keep having this recurring dream there"s blood on my hands. Flashbacks of the past. Wish I was dead. To sleep. To dream. But dreams turn to nightmares. Can only laugh.

Now I am light, now I fly, now I see myself beneath myself, now a god dances through me.

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Max Payne 3, is that you?

I have not arranged a date, but I will be meeting my son"s soon-to-be step dad. My ex informed me that he doesnt know she cheated on me.... I want so bad to tell the guy, but I know its not my place.


Life was a million times easier when I was naive and dumb to the "real" shit that goes on in this world. I have so many things I have to be careful of because of this woman. What I wouldnt give to have back my child-like naivety.

Brad2770 said:

I have not arranged a date, but I will be meeting my son"s soon-to-be step dad. My ex informed me that he doesnt know she cheated on me.... I want so bad to tell the guy, but I know its not my place.


Life was a million times easier when I was naive and dumb to the "real" shit that goes on in this world. I have so many things I have to be careful of because of this woman. What I wouldnt give to have back my child-like naivety.

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Fuck it, wear a shirt that says "That bitch cheated on me, and she"ll cheat on you too." Pretty sure that it"s required by law that you inform him.

brekk said:

Was the cheating a cause of your divorce? I"m sure its been mentioned in the thread but I dont remember.

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The cheating is what brought all of our issues to the table. Our reason for divorce was the lack of communication.

It was still our reason for not reconciling the 2 times we got back together. Even though i was willing to talk, I"m not good at telling someone how I feel and she wasnt willing to talk about it at all.

After it was all said and done, I was willing to look past it all- We both made mistakes and I was willing to do everything it took to make it work. She didnt want to anymore.

Oh, I knew it was before I ever posted....

brekk said:

Don"t tell him for you personal benefit, tell him to save your kid from going through another shitty divorce.

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Ding, ding, ding.

Go ahead and tell that guy, because I will put money on it she will tell him what led up to those events. You "letting yourself and your relationship go" for EverQuest. Then you"re going to look like a big [jealous] douchebag. Don"t lie, you don"t care about this dude or him being cheated on. You care that he"s marrying your ex-wife that you took for granted. She cheated because she"s a retard who should have just left or requested counseling...and really, how many people who are addicted to games give a shit about their girlfriend, wife, etc. leaving them or wanting counseling to fix things?

I know, it"s her job to make the effort. It"s her job to tell you she"s being ignored. It"s her job to voice her concerns and find a way to "out-perform" the video game. However, here in reality - you can either realize you"re being a inattentive dick expecting someone who loves you to compete with a fucking game and try to change it (or at least come to an agreement), or act all surprised when your significant other leaves you for someone who will actually pay attention to them. I don"t think anyone should cheat, I think people should try to fix their relationship and if the other partner can"t meet half way; learn to live with it or get the hell out.

Brad, weren"t you going to a therapist? You really need to get over this chick dude, it seems like everyone there except for you has moved on. You"re pretty much forcing yourself to be stuck in a rut for no reason whatsoever.

But eh, I usually just snap in with one liners to be a dick so what do I know. You haven"t listened to anyone yet so why will you ever start? haha

Ravvenn said:

Go ahead and tell that guy, because I will put money on it she will tell him what led up to those events. You "letting yourself and your relationship go" for EverQuest. Then you"re going to look like a big [jealous] douchebag. Don"t lie, you don"t care about this dude or him being cheated on. You care that he"s marrying your ex-wife that you took for granted. She cheated because she"s a retard who should have just left or requested counseling...and really, how many people who are addicted to games give a shit about their girlfriend, wife, etc. leaving them or wanting counseling to fix things?

I know, it"s her job to make the effort. It"s her job to tell you she"s being ignored. It"s her job to voice her concerns and find a way to "out-perform" the video game. However, here in reality - you can either realize you"re being a inattentive dick expecting someone who loves you to compete with a fucking game and try to change it (or at least come to an agreement), or act all surprised when your significant other leaves you for someone who will actually pay attention to them. I don"t think anyone should cheat, I think people should try to fix their relationship and if the other partner can"t meet half way; learn to live with it or get the hell out.

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oh snap.

I dont plan to tell him anything. One thing I learned (recently) is that things will come out in the wash eventually. This past summer, my new assistant that was hired was only with the company for 2 months and was telling my boss lies about me. Some pretty severe things that were straight up lies. I didnt know anything was up until I ran into some fishy events and contacted my boss to inform her. Thats when everything came to the table.

I didnt know what to do. I knew that this new guy was a snake, but there was no convincing my boss, especially after some of the shit he had told her. I was freaking out. I had called a couple of my friends to find out what i should do. I am the sort of person to confront a situation and make it nasty if need be. But both of my friends convinced me he would hang himself eventually. It was a huge gamble, but I committed to making sure I did what i had to do and just left the guy alone.

Not even 2 weeks later, his ass got caught for stealing cash from within the company. Not only that, but it lead to the company checking out several other managers and we ended up having 3 managers and 2 assistants fired.

I never received an appology from my boss, but she did say "I promise this wont happy again." talking about the things he had told her and what she had started to believe.

My point- I can actually fucking learn. Im not going to tell this guy anything. Im the last person either of those two would listen to and I know it. I just want to meet the guy to at least see how he talks, how he acts and just see how he responds to certain questions about my son. If I can sense that he genuinely cares about my son, then I will feel much better.

I have been to my therapist. She was the one that suggested I meet him. She told me that there is a large possibilty of why I feel this way is because of the fear of the unknown. Once I meet the guy, I could feel a ton more comfortable. And when i posted a few days ago about being happy for my ex- I am.

I am bothered that i let myself go, that I lost my ex, but I swear I have nothing against this guy or her marrying him. As stupid as it sounds, it took me watching Bender"s Big Score to finally realize that i just need to be happy for her. I am.

I wish the best for her because I want the best for me. I want good things to happen for her so I can finally dig myself out of this rut I have been in for two years. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again hoping for different results. Last 2 years i have had anger and jealousy raging within me and it has done nothing for me. Now I am trying happiness and honestly, its working.


My whole reason for posting was that I was honestly surprised she told me he didnt know and on top of that actually trusts that I wouldnt tell him.

You lost your wife because of Everquest?

Do you not read? My marriage was lost due to lack of communication.

This (some of) what I was referring to.

Brad2770 said:

The most- Playing MMOs as much as I did. I ignored her for those damned games. Mainly its the fact I wasnt there for her and I didnt listen to her. She was my first real relationship. I regret messing up something I wanted more than anything.

At times, I feel like a person who has won the lottery, blew it all and is back where they used to be knowing they will not win the lottery again. If you kind of see what I mean. I have never been one to need money to be happy.

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Brad2770 said:

I cannot go through and quote everyone and answer directly, but I will try and pick up and a answer a few things some people might be wondering.

Me and my wife got married when I was 24 and she was 19. She started dating me right out of highschool, right after she turned 18 (I have known her since she was 14). So, yes, she was young, but my wife has always seemed very mature, so I felt safe with marrying her. I knew it was what I wanted and I felt like it was what she wanted.

Now here is the shitty part.... I was laid off 4 days before our wedding, so going into the marriage, I had no job. for the next 2 years, I would have short term temp jobs, but nothing like I had before, so my wife pretty much supported us while she was 19 and 20 years old. (thats alot to take in at that age, no way I was doing shit like that when I was 19 and 20.)

On top of that, I got addicted to EQ. Played hardcore on Veeshan (was Fiends keke) for awhile. And then after EQ got into WoW hardcore (didnt play in a guild, but played all the time running instances and shit). My wife grew used the being alone and being ignored. I founf out she cheated on me back in March with an old Highschool Boyfriend. I told her, that night, to choose. I dropped games, got a gym membership and have been working to change OUR life.

She told me last night in the process of my change, as I got happier with us, she said she realized she wasnt happy. As things got better, the worse she felt and she felt like she was lying to herself to stay with me.

She says she still thinks of doing things with me and doesnt deny they couldnt happen, but for now, she just wants to be alone and live on her own.

Thats pretty much the shortest of the long stories.

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I wanted to add, this isn"t to be cruel. It"s to point out the obvious many have forgotten. She was too young to be married and supporting a family. On top of that, she was being neglected; she was bound to snap and go chase the youth she missed out on (being 21). This probably stings, but she got to do that. Go out, party, socialize, be "normal", etc. She"s probably "really" ready to settle down now.

Shit happens, learn from it and move on - this is something a lot of people can learn from.

I have already accepted that. I mean it when i say it- (and I have said it to my own parents and her)

I hope he doesnt hurt her like I did. I hope she doesnt feel the need to look for love outside of her marriage with him. I mean that with all of my heart. She deserves it. She was a perfect woman before she married me, even if she was 19.

Had I been a man, I really do not think I/we would be where we are. Youre already telling me things I have come to terms with.


The communication part comes in to play because had she walked in, hit me with a frying pan and straight up told me (Like a man needs to be told), "Youre fucking up. I need your attnetion." instead of signs i never picked up on, it would have been better. When i did sense that things were going bad, I would ask what was wrong and she told me nothing. I was clueless to the fact I was doing real damage. Lack of experience in relationships and the fact I believed what she said. I had no clue I had to look for signs. I thought words were good enough.


but all of this doesnt matter. I am past all of this. I am happy for her and her choice, though i was surprised. I wouldnt have posted anymore about her marriage, had it not been for the cover up......

I think me and my wife are about to split. Well, im pushing for it. Tired of being unhappy, but she thinks the longer we stay together the better things will get? I dont get it! When i was deployed she fucked a bunch of dudes, i come back and shes still fucking dudes! Then when i find out im supposed to just be cool with everything that goes down, and if i get mad or feel like im stuck in a room with walls closing in on me, im in the wrong? Fuck marriage! Im stuck in a rock and a hard-place though, and shes about as easy to get rid of as a bad case of herpes.