Girls who broke your heart thread

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Sutekh

Blackwing Lair Raider
7,489
106
TheCutlery said:
This is fine if you"re 22. If you"re nearing 30, you need to revise your selection criteria, because the only ones that don"t have kids are going to be the ones that don"t have them for a reason, and waiting for you isn"t that reason.
Because they didn"t want kids? Pretty sure there isn"t something wrong with a woman if they don"t have kids by 30. It just means they"re normal in my book.
 

Kirun

Buzzfeed Editor
19,235
15,625
Sutekh said:
Because they didn"t want kids? Pretty sure there isn"t something wrong with a woman if they don"t have kids by 30. It just means they"reresponsiblein my book.
Fixed.
 

Kuriin

Just a Nurse
4,046
1,020
TheCutlery said:
This is fine if you"re 22. If you"re nearing 30, you need to revise your selection criteria, because the only ones that don"t have kids are going to be the ones that don"t have them for a reason, and waiting for you isn"t that reason.
Yeah. No.
 

Sharmai_foh

shitlord
0
0
kollos said:
just avoid the interview conversation. if you"re asked what you"re doing for a living, tell them you are a whale hunter, a shaman, or whatever. those are boring topics to talk about when you have just meet. try to have a fun conversation.
Actually this isn"t a bad idea. If you are the kind of person who has trouble having conversations here is an good example of how you can fix that.

Example Bad Conversation
Her: So what do you do for a living?
You: I work with computers and kind of fix them.
Her: ......... ....... ..... (he is so boring)


Example Good Conversation
Her: So what do you do for a living?

You: (Perfectly straight face and voice) I hunt whales
Her: (Disbelief reaction) Wha....?

You: (Still perfectly straight face and voice and acting like you are misinterpreting her disbelief) Well only off the coast of Norway for 2 or 3 months out of the year but I try to make it fair for the whales by only using hammers
Her: Wait, what are you serious? You hunt whales? With hammers? (Introducing a second even more ridiculous statement can throw her off balance)

You: Yes you know hammers? The kind you use to hammer nails?
Her: Wait, no you can"t be serious? Nails? Whales?

You: (BIG GRIN) Heck no I"m not serious but you sure bought it! You were ready believe I was on the back the a whale hitting it with a hammer!
Her: (Punch, kick, poke, laugh, roll eyes, grin) No I wasn"t! (her she starts making fun of you) So what do you really do? Do you really hunt animals? Have you killed a whale?


blah blah blah.....

------- From this point forward you are in and this is a date the she is going to remember even if it doesn"t work out in the end. And yes the above conversation is corny as hell but that"s ok because the worst pickup lines in the world still work because they are delivered with a straight face and confidence.

Also the above counts as a big Bonus Points boost. I"ve talked about bonus points before but if you don"t know then let me know if you are curious.
 

Dabamf_sl

shitlord
1,472
0
Whyme said:
Dabamf, you and I are going to have to agree to disagree here because I don"t believe that any of the things I mentioned are unattainable to the common guy.

Take me for instance. I was an absolute mess coming out of high school. I had no self-esteem, no physical shape to speak of and I had no idea how to handle myself in conversation. I would come off as arrogant and haughty when I really just wanted to be friendly and sociable.

It took me a LONG time to realize that I had these problems, but once I did I didn"t just say "oh well, guess I"m just fucked for the rest of my life!" I set about fixing them. I read books, I started being more actively aware of people"s responses to my own behavior and I mimic"d those that I saw had the social traits that I wanted.

No matter how dense you are, you can learn to tell a joke. You can learn about irony and you can learn to look at things in a humorous way. Are you going to be David Letterman? No, but you can be humorous and affable.

I also learned about the power of positivity and its effect on those around. You can train your mind to think and speak positively, and from my experience it is one of the most powerful tools in the social arsenal. Everyone loves to be around a happy, positive person.

So, regardless of what people may think or say, the traits that I originally listed are not above anyone"s emotional scope. All it takes is the desire.

Or you can just give in to self-defeatism and never bother trying in the first place.
just giving you shit for listing obvious good qualities without means to attain them

but then you wrote the means as response to my post....I"m a genius!

In other news I finally made a korean cupid profile. It was a challenge to get across the personality I wanted to that is also understandable to someone who"s English isn"t perfect. It"s still kinda weak, but the problem right now is I have no profile pic because they keep rejecting my photos. I have an awesome self-taken one of me at the top of Mt. Fuji with the layer of clouds below me in the background, and they say "poor photo quality." Group shots are also not allowed. I tried to make my set of photos include a variety of things but that all got shot down.

Anyway, I"ll definitely be doing the numbers game like its my job there. Unfortunately the only way to do that is pay like $30 a month for a premium account b/c free members can"t talk to other free ones, and almost no girls there have premium accounts.....make"s me wonder if its not a total waste of time/money because of that.

I like how TheCutlery thinks all women just get knocked up by age 28. I know America has this culture where people have babies willy nilly, but not everyone"s vagina is a baby factory before 30. In Korea couples just pull out and get abortions when that doesn"t work because babies out of wedlock are a HUGE no-no.
 

Zehnpai

Molten Core Raider
399
1,245
People actually use the word "heck" in conversation? Like, not to mock Christians who take offense at the word H-E-Double hockey sticks?
 

Jabberwhacky_foh

shitlord
0
0
Ummmmmmm yes you want to upgrade your account. I checked out the site a while back when you mentioned it (saying you"d just use it to get laid btw do you have a newsletter I would like to subscribe) and after perusing the goods, I decided 30 bucks is chump change if it pays off even just one time. I upgraded Friday, and since then I"ve already got 7 girls who "showed interest," one IM, and one email from a gold member. I only got two pics up, and the chick who IMed me actually said the second one made me look like a moron, so I"ve been gimped the whole time. And I"m in god damn Busan; 80% of the chicks on there are in Seoul with you. AND that"s just the women bold enough to approach me, I"ve sent out a lot of messages and had some bites as well. I"m not trying to act like a badass playa who"s gonna slay all this pussy, I"m just trying to convince you the site is good.

And just cuz she"s hot, this chick has this picture as her main profile pic and her headline is "Looking for soul mate." Yaaaaaa that"s sincere.
 

Dabamf_sl

shitlord
1,472
0
Convinced.

Did you and the old lady break up or what?

And do you have any Seoul plans any time soon? Despite past failures, we are foh brethren and destined to hang out.
 

Gryeyes_foh

shitlord
0
0
Any remotely hot chick is going to be inundated with offers of online cock on a dating site. This does not play to the favor of average dudes banging hot chicks. Need to get them away from the pack (male/female) and use mental trickery to sell yourself. Isolate and conquer.

Also I am 31 and have never dated a chick with kids. Yeah people be breeding but you can easily avoid it without harshing your game. And unless you look old its hardly an issue to bang 18-21 year old range. Granted you probably are around that age bracket less and less. But between going to a "hip" bar and banging some 21 year old or being forced to fuck breeders I am going to hip bar!
 

Jabberwhacky_foh

shitlord
0
0
Ya we kinda did. We just got back in March for another go-round of teaching, but this time there"s been a lot of....issues.

I don"t have any Seoul plans, but I"ll get up there for a weekend at some point and do it proper. How much longer are you in for?
 

Cutlery

Kill All the White People
<Gold Donor>
6,930
20,742
Dabamf said:
I like how TheCutlery thinks all women just get knocked up by age 28. I know America has this culture where people have babies willy nilly, but not everyone"s vagina is a baby factory before 30. In Korea couples just pull out and get abortions when that doesn"t work because babies out of wedlock are a HUGE no-no.
Yeah, and this isn"t fucking Korea. This is America where shit like Teen Moms makes it onto TV. I know your societal normal expectations have changed from being over there so long, but you"ve gotta realize that culture isn"t this one, and that"s never going to change.

Did I ever say that all women have kids by 30? Uhh, no, I didn"t. But to expect that you"re going to make it through the prime breeding years without encountering a significant percentage of the population having done so is ridiculous. Can you find women without kids at 30? Yeah, of course you can. Are you eliminating a HUGE swathe of women by doing so? Uhh, knock, knock puddinhead.

Reality check. People in this country are, by and large, completely irresponsible in all facets of life. That"s why we have the problems we do today like an obesity epidemic, type 2 diabetes, mortgage crises, bad credit, dependance on fossil fuels, etc, etc. You somehow think that the vast majority of THESE people also decided that it was a good idea to not get knocked up by the guy they were dating for a year and a half? What the fuck man. You guys keep living in your fantasy world, it"s clearly better than the real world.
 

Awlbiste_sl

shitlord
46
0
TheCutlery said:
Can you find women without kids at 30? Yeah, of course you can. Are you eliminating a HUGE swathe of women by doing so? Uhh, knock, knock puddinhead.
Really? I can say I know very few women who are single with kids at 30. Maybe it"s just the area in which I live. If you really wanted to argue that, I could concede that it"s simply my particular are and the people I choose to know and acquaint myself with. My real issue here is:

the only ones that don"t have kids are going to be the ones that don"t have them for a reason, and waiting for you isn"t that reason.
The wording you chose here makes it seem like you think there is something wrong with women who don"t somehow already have children by 30.
 

Lefazz_foh

shitlord
0
0
Awlbiste said:
The wording you chose here makes it seem like you think there is something wrong with women who don"t somehow already have children by 30.
I would have to say that most American females are sluts...so, by 30, there has been a large enough amount of time for an "accident" to have occurred.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
607
Eomer said:
Question for those of you with any experience on eHarmony: I opened up an account a few days ago and have a couple matches that I"m interested in. Is it best to stick with the rigid, and seemingly retarded guided communication path with picking out questions for them to answer etc? Or just straight up cut to the chase and send an email?
It pretty much seems like you have to do the horrible Q&A then it will reveal "open" communication. eHarmony was the worst and least successful of all my online dating sites. Once it gets to the "open" stage it just felt really awkward. I think I went on 3 dates with girls from the site and all were bombs.
 

Cutlery

Kill All the White People
<Gold Donor>
6,930
20,742
Awlbiste said:
Really? I can say I know very few women who are single with kids at 30. Maybe it"s just the area in which I live. If you really wanted to argue that, I could concede that it"s simply my particular are and the people I choose to know and acquaint myself with. My real issue here is:

The wording you chose here makes it seem like you think there is something wrong with women who don"t somehow already have children by 30.
Single, divorced, whatever dude. There"s a lot of women who get complacent once they"ve been with a guy for a year or so and stop being as careful as they should be. How many of you have relationships that have lasted over a year and ended? How many of you were barebacking it when it ended? You"re telling me there"s no way that kids are born in that scenario? Bullshit. It happens. It happens frequently. People also get married early-mid twenties, crank out a kid, and the relationship heads south with the stress of kids. That doesn"t happen in your neck of the woods either? Come on, lets be realistic here. Look at the dating pool at 30, you honestly expect all of those women to be virgins? It"s completely ridiculous.

My wording doesn"t imply that there"s something wrong with it...it implies that there"s a reason they don"t have kids. Whether they"re actually focused on their careers, don"t want kids, fucking psycho, or whatever. Very few of them are still looking for the right guy to have kids with, there"s an underlying reason why they don"t have kids. Could be good, could be bad. I didn"t specify, you chose to read it as all bad. Personally, I can think of 4 off the top of my head in that category...one is my wife"s boss, who works 80 hours a week and travels 20+ weeks a year. She"s got no time for a relationship, so she doesn"t have a kid, and she"s also not in the dating pool. Another one is crazy as fuck and it"s a good thing that she realized that she"s definitely not breeding material. The 3rd, at least the way my wife tells it, basically never uses protection at all and somehow managed to make it to 30 without a kid. I"m voting barren, but hey, miracles do happen. The 4th is 33 and fixed. I mean, come on. That"s not a realistic sample of women in the dating pool at 30. It"s not. Most of them were in a serious/semi-serious relationship, got lazy/sloppy/complacent, cranked out a kid, broke it off and now are just single moms, for better or worse.

You can either choose to ignore reality and keep waiting for the diamond in the rough, or you can embrace it and deal with it. You don"t wanna deal with a woman with kids? That"s fine, keep on keeping on. It just eliminates a good chunk of the population the older you get. Or you can realize that hey, if the woman is worth being with, her kids are probably pretty cool too. And you got it without having to change a diaper. Double score.
 

Awlbiste_sl

shitlord
46
0
TheCutlery said:
Look at the dating pool at 30, you honestly expect all of those women to be virgins? It"s completely ridiculous.
Not a virgin does not equal has a child. Not by a longshot.

TheCutlery said:
You don"t wanna deal with a woman with kids? That"s fine, keep on keeping on.
Thankfully my current relationship does not involve children. If it should end for some reason (knock on wood) my next one won"t either. Frankly, I"d rather be alone forever than have to deal with children.

This is just me, personally.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
607
Everytime I"ve barebacked a chick I make sure she is on BC. I don"t subscribe to the Tarrent idea of "Kids just happen." If you are responsible they simply do not happen.