Girls who broke your heart thread
- Thread starter Aychamo BanBan
- Start date
Actually did nearly what you said before I read this thread today, earlier this morning while I was packing up. It went something like this...Nanaki Ikanan said:
Her: Oh yes!
Me: Nude?
Her: Oh yes!
Me: Sweet. I"ll be there in 2 days. Hope things don"t change once I get there.
Her: You"re finally leaving? I"m excited to see you!
Me: Well, you"ve managed to excite me recently, with all the nudity.
Her: Oh my! I"m blushing!
Me: Mission accomplished.
Her: Oh yes! Definitely!
Me: See you at the airport, with a blunt. Too bad state laws are harsh on public nudity.
Her: Yeah, then you could come in style
Me: You too.
Her: Well, we won"t be at the airport too long!
Me: See you there.
Her: Can"t wait!
And yes, she literally types Oh yes! Oh my! on facebook in nearly every reply and any time she greets me. Kind of weird, sounds like something a grandmother in the 50"s would say.
Guess I"ll see soon if she"s as "friendly" in person. This could be fun.
Haha I like how everyone else"s advice except the one guy saying "Yeah fuck her!" gets ignored. Either way congrats Wraith sounds like you like her (or at least want to diddle her) so keep us updated on what happens at the airport. I"m rooting for ya!
The friendship isn"t real anyway. He might think it is, but I"ve known girls like that and they are mostly parasites. If they are having a shit time you might have their back, but if you are, they are no where to be seen. And if the new flavor of the month comes along, you"re out also.
I"m a little jaded though. After always dismissing girls like that, I gave one a chance as a friend. I was always a little cautious about investing much while she went around introducing me to everyone as her best friend and talking me up all the time like I was her god damn friend soul mate. Then not too much time passed before she took a giant shit on our friendship for some new fuck she didn"t even like. So perhaps I"m a little biased. But it"s 99% of the time a waste of time.
So I vote sleep with her and do whatever you want, just don"t get attached "cause girls like that have no personality or belief system foundation--they just kinda go where the wind takes them--and eventually that leads to you getting fucked over.
/bitter
In other news, I asked for DG back around Mondayish because I had way more feelings for her than I thought and found myself missing her company quite a bit on vacation even though the vacation itself was some of the most fun I"ve ever had. The language thing matters quite a bit, but its not exactly a deal-breaker for the short term, and there are other issues that are fixable, or at least I want to try and fix before giving up. I think I resolved what the problem is and know how to address it.
She"s quite prideful though and told me she was really really hurt when I broke up with her, so she"s not making it easy to get back together even though I can tell she wants to give it another go. This is the most pursuing I"ve ever done in my life by a magnitude of seriously like 10. If I posted my texting logs you guys would shit your pants.
I"m well aware that if I had other prospects it wouldn"t be very hard to move on. I have a 2nd date on Saturday with the Korean girl (now named Halloween bc when we met) that I had a mediocre time with for no other reason than I have nothing better to do. I"m not expecting it to be exciting in the least. Then, a pretty cute and really tall Korean girl struck up a conversation with me at the bus stop (only 2nd time that"s happened with interest since I came here) yesterday and conversation flowed really well. And she"s cute. But I just couldn"t have cared less about pursuing it. I looked ahead to the multiple dates getting her comfortable to overcome her shyness, the inability to bypass her cautious nature towards foreign men, 1 months to kiss, 3+ months for sex, etc etc and just said fuck it. God what a different story that is from the states where I"d have no question asked for her number and tried to make a booty call out of it. Even some girls in Korea are good for that though, but I simply didn"t care to try. I think part of it is the winter. I hate winter, cold makes me hermit up big time and kills my mood.
I"m a little jaded though. After always dismissing girls like that, I gave one a chance as a friend. I was always a little cautious about investing much while she went around introducing me to everyone as her best friend and talking me up all the time like I was her god damn friend soul mate. Then not too much time passed before she took a giant shit on our friendship for some new fuck she didn"t even like. So perhaps I"m a little biased. But it"s 99% of the time a waste of time.
So I vote sleep with her and do whatever you want, just don"t get attached "cause girls like that have no personality or belief system foundation--they just kinda go where the wind takes them--and eventually that leads to you getting fucked over.
/bitter
In other news, I asked for DG back around Mondayish because I had way more feelings for her than I thought and found myself missing her company quite a bit on vacation even though the vacation itself was some of the most fun I"ve ever had. The language thing matters quite a bit, but its not exactly a deal-breaker for the short term, and there are other issues that are fixable, or at least I want to try and fix before giving up. I think I resolved what the problem is and know how to address it.
She"s quite prideful though and told me she was really really hurt when I broke up with her, so she"s not making it easy to get back together even though I can tell she wants to give it another go. This is the most pursuing I"ve ever done in my life by a magnitude of seriously like 10. If I posted my texting logs you guys would shit your pants.
I"m well aware that if I had other prospects it wouldn"t be very hard to move on. I have a 2nd date on Saturday with the Korean girl (now named Halloween bc when we met) that I had a mediocre time with for no other reason than I have nothing better to do. I"m not expecting it to be exciting in the least. Then, a pretty cute and really tall Korean girl struck up a conversation with me at the bus stop (only 2nd time that"s happened with interest since I came here) yesterday and conversation flowed really well. And she"s cute. But I just couldn"t have cared less about pursuing it. I looked ahead to the multiple dates getting her comfortable to overcome her shyness, the inability to bypass her cautious nature towards foreign men, 1 months to kiss, 3+ months for sex, etc etc and just said fuck it. God what a different story that is from the states where I"d have no question asked for her number and tried to make a booty call out of it. Even some girls in Korea are good for that though, but I simply didn"t care to try. I think part of it is the winter. I hate winter, cold makes me hermit up big time and kills my mood.
Yea I don"t really have any delusions about what will happen. If I were to go on my own judgment at this very moment, I"d say it"s probably best to leave it alone. But I"m exploring a different avenue than I usually take, partly because I"m tired of going years between relationships because I write people off too quickly and I want to try a different avenue, partly because I want to see flaws in my typical behavior from the outside-in, and partly because I have never gone this path before and want to explore it.Whyme said:
Brad2770
Avatar of War Slayer
- 5,221
- 16,409
My assistant showed me this girl"s myspace yesterday. Said he would talk to her for me. I told him I wasnt interested. She is 23. (My assistant is 21, so he knows her through his collective of friends).
He texts me and said he showed her my myspace and she wouldnt mind meeting me. Im not really interested. I know Im not over my ex. I have been missing her, but I do want to be over her, but I dont want to get involved with another girl right now because I think that may be why things dwindle is because I never did get over her (I know I have said I was over her, but it may have been more of me trying to make myself believe it than anything. If I was over her, I wouldnt be missing her)... but I really dont know how. I have stayed home every night and watched TV or played PS3 since Diane moved out, which is actually some kind of record. I am usually doing something 2 or 3 times a week. (well, I did play poker Christmas night and I saw Avatar and Sherlock Holmes)
I have thoughts pop into my head that I cant control. One thing reminds me of another thing, reminds me of another thing. It"s like that stupid ass Kevin Bacon game always gets my mind back to my ex. Example: This morning it was cold as fuck. I was really cold, so I thought I might need my big ass winter jacket (the last time I used it here in Texas was in 2001). Once I thought of the jacket, i thought of my ex because we built a snowman the night I wore it. Then I thought about the hug she gave me after we built the snowman... then I wanted a hug from her. The thoughts were so fast, I didnt have a chance to think of something else.
It"s that kind of shit that makes me miss her. Im so tempted to get a new job working a warehouse or some shit so I can work with other people and not work alone. It would be a huge pay cut and I would have to start paying rent again, but I am beginning to think my sanity is more important than the money i would be making.....
What can I do to get my thoughts away from her without relying on another female? I havent talked to my ex in 2 days. I really do try and avoid her, even though I really would like to talk to her...
Actually, on second thought, I dont really want to talk to theher of now. She is actually a bitch and usually makes me angry when we do talk.
He texts me and said he showed her my myspace and she wouldnt mind meeting me. Im not really interested. I know Im not over my ex. I have been missing her, but I do want to be over her, but I dont want to get involved with another girl right now because I think that may be why things dwindle is because I never did get over her (I know I have said I was over her, but it may have been more of me trying to make myself believe it than anything. If I was over her, I wouldnt be missing her)... but I really dont know how. I have stayed home every night and watched TV or played PS3 since Diane moved out, which is actually some kind of record. I am usually doing something 2 or 3 times a week. (well, I did play poker Christmas night and I saw Avatar and Sherlock Holmes)
I have thoughts pop into my head that I cant control. One thing reminds me of another thing, reminds me of another thing. It"s like that stupid ass Kevin Bacon game always gets my mind back to my ex. Example: This morning it was cold as fuck. I was really cold, so I thought I might need my big ass winter jacket (the last time I used it here in Texas was in 2001). Once I thought of the jacket, i thought of my ex because we built a snowman the night I wore it. Then I thought about the hug she gave me after we built the snowman... then I wanted a hug from her. The thoughts were so fast, I didnt have a chance to think of something else.
It"s that kind of shit that makes me miss her. Im so tempted to get a new job working a warehouse or some shit so I can work with other people and not work alone. It would be a huge pay cut and I would have to start paying rent again, but I am beginning to think my sanity is more important than the money i would be making.....
What can I do to get my thoughts away from her without relying on another female? I havent talked to my ex in 2 days. I really do try and avoid her, even though I really would like to talk to her...
Actually, on second thought, I dont really want to talk to theher of now. She is actually a bitch and usually makes me angry when we do talk.
Your issue is that repression is the least likely to succeed mental defense mechanism, despite it being the most naturally inclined to occur.
You need to stop thinking that you should forget your ex, and just confront it and accept that those feelings aren"t going away, and instead of letting them trample your life, channel that into new projects and/or relationships(the most successful mental defense mechanism, sublimation).
If you keep repressing it"s just going to keep making YOU more crazy.
Despite not being clinically certified, I feel the previous advice is representative of 12 years of psychological education, and as such will send you a bill via PM.
- 3,223
- 3,493
I"ve actually figured this out as of lately, after finally getting exhausted of going in circles over my ex, I said fuck it I"m tired of this bullshit. I still fight it but whenever I say to myself okay this is how shit is, it"s not changing anytime soon and accept it, then I usually feel a lot more at peace and less thoughts of ex.. good advice.Darus Grey said:
Eomer
Trakanon Raider
- 5,472
- 272
Yeah, I"d been doing the same thing with Anne and overall it was working in terms of feeling good about things. Maybe a month or two after we broke up (so July/August) I was a bit down on things, but kept telling myself that it"ll go away and everything"s cool. And everything WAS cool. She"d pop up in my thoughts from time to time and I"d file it away as best I could.
Problem was, as I said before, it kind of got to that 90-95% done range, and then just stopped progressing further. I"m sure it wasn"t helped by the occasional texting back and forth we did (initiated by her probably 8 of the 10 or so times). Other than that no contact with her whatsoever, no phone calls, saw her from a distance once or twice at a music festival and that was about it.
So on the whole "hey my ex wasn"t so bad" theme, we"re gonna go grab a drink or something on Tuesday most likely. I won"t go in to details because you fuckers just jump all over every little thing, but yes it was I who took suggested we meet up and she said sure. Talked with her on the phone tonight for the first time since back when we broke up, felt fairly normal, just kept it brief and agreed she"d give me a call after a staff meeting on Tuesday and we"d figure something out then.
Queue much laughter. I have no idea what the point of this is.
Also expecting a phone call from the other girl tomorrow, she was out of town the past 5 days for some sort of student thing down in Quebec. Still only had the one date, but I"m sure we"ll be going for more.
This could get confusing, as their names are virtually identical. If Anne was Anne"s name, the new girl"s name would be Anna. Literally one letter difference between the two.
Problem was, as I said before, it kind of got to that 90-95% done range, and then just stopped progressing further. I"m sure it wasn"t helped by the occasional texting back and forth we did (initiated by her probably 8 of the 10 or so times). Other than that no contact with her whatsoever, no phone calls, saw her from a distance once or twice at a music festival and that was about it.
So on the whole "hey my ex wasn"t so bad" theme, we"re gonna go grab a drink or something on Tuesday most likely. I won"t go in to details because you fuckers just jump all over every little thing, but yes it was I who took suggested we meet up and she said sure. Talked with her on the phone tonight for the first time since back when we broke up, felt fairly normal, just kept it brief and agreed she"d give me a call after a staff meeting on Tuesday and we"d figure something out then.
Queue much laughter. I have no idea what the point of this is.
Also expecting a phone call from the other girl tomorrow, she was out of town the past 5 days for some sort of student thing down in Quebec. Still only had the one date, but I"m sure we"ll be going for more.
This could get confusing, as their names are virtually identical. If Anne was Anne"s name, the new girl"s name would be Anna. Literally one letter difference between the two.
My girlfriend and I have the same name.AladainAF said:
It"s actually not as weird as I thought it would be.