House of the Dragon

Izo

Tranny Chaser
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I need with certainty when the white knight was roasted that a black man or woman was going to be on that dragon.
Election 2020 Love GIF by Joe Biden
 

Chris

Potato del Grande
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Famous last words of actors throughout history. It felt right for the characters.

I'm sure Marlon Brando said the exact same thing when he adlibed slipping his cock into Maria Schneider's ass instead of just pretending to do it in Last Tango in Paris.
Imagine the fury if Matt Smith was adding in kissing scenes with co stars he had no romance plot with.
 
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Breakdown

Gunnar Durden
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LOL at the random appearance of GIRL BOSS LESBO POWERS UNITE

Holy shit this show is epic bad.
 
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Juvarisx

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I need with certainty when the white knight was roasted that a black man or woman was going to be on that dragon.

So like its accurate with the book, other then the Velayron's being race swapped. They have introduced them all, two are white men in the show as well, the 4th is a merged character for the show.

Spoilers if you want em

Addam of Hull (Corlys bastard with the hair) bonds with Seasmoke and is named heir to Driftmark after (this is the obvious raceswap)
Hugh Hammer - The Blacksmith they have been following around showing the plight of the small folk in Kings Landing, bonds with Vermithor (a real badass dragon)
Ulf White - The popular but always drunk dude in the taven that was telling the tale of being a bastard of Baylon the Brave (reality is he doesnt know which), bonds with Silverwing
Nettles - Merged with Rhaena Targaryen, black girl in the book, she is the one staying at the Eryie, they wanted to give her more to do which makes sense, bonds with Sheepsteeler, the wild one hanging out around there that you saw the destruction by last episode.
 
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Sylas

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So like its accurate with the book, other then the Velayron's being race swapped. They have introduced them all, two are white men in the show as well, the 4th is a merged character for the show.

Spoilers if you want em

Addam of Hull (Corlys bastard with the hair) bonds with Seasmoke and is named heir to Driftmark after (this is the obvious raceswap)
Hugh Hammer - The Blacksmith they have been following around showing the plight of the small folk in Kings Landing, bonds with Vermithor (a real badass dragon)
Ulf White - The popular but always drunk dude in the taven that was telling the tale of being a bastard of Baylon the Brave (reality is he doesnt know which), bonds with Silverwing
Nettles - Merged with Rhaena Targaryen, black girl in the book, she is the one staying at the Eryie, they wanted to give her more to do which makes sense, bonds with Sheepsteeler, the wild one hanging out around there that you saw the destruction by last episode.
They also age swapped Alyn and Addam, so Alyn would be named Heir in the show, not Addam. Doesn't really matter Addam and seasmoke die and then Alyn is named the heir afterwards.

Having both Hugh and Ulf live in King's landing is pretty fucking retarded, even for these writers. Obviously the location is a huge hindrance, how do they get from King's landing to Dragonstone? the gates are barred, there's a massive naval blockade, I guess they just teleport like every other character, whatever this is dumb but somewhat moot.

The Characters themselves though they have totally fucked up on. Ulf doesn't really matter they just showed him as a drunk braggart (accurate) but Hugh they have used this character to show the plight of the smallfolk in King's landing, being forced to work for Aegon but not getting paid for the steel, etc. This clearly sets him up as hating Aegon or at least having reason to fight against him. Except both of these characters immediately betray Rhaenyra and join Aegon's team the moment they have to face a dragon in combat, then they set themselves up, hugh especially, to try and take the throne since all the actual heirs are dead and gone at this point, and the two of them are basically the last 2 dragons/dragon riders, so they just sit ruling tumbleton as kings until Addam sacrifices himself to take them out, killing them all.

Where did you get that they are going to merge Rhaena and Nettles? especially since they are going to have her accompany the two toddlers Aegon III and Viserys on the Gay Abandon when it gets captured by the Triarchy. This was a dumb change also but since the toddlers are too young to ride dragons and their dragons are too small to carry them anyway, it's obvious they are going to have Rhaena save Aegon III but not save Viserys so she can feel super sad about it and another one of Rhaenyra's blunders gets pawned off on a different character.

I figured they moved Sheepstealer to the Vale and have nettles be from the Vale, because that's where they end up retiring to after the war. Nettles and Sheepstealer end up living in a cave worshipped by the hill tribesman as a fire goddess.
 

Juvarisx

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They also age swapped Alyn and Addam, so Alyn would be named Heir in the show, not Addam. Doesn't really matter Addam and seasmoke die and then Alyn is named the heir afterwards.

Having both Hugh and Ulf live in King's landing is pretty fucking retarded, even for these writers. Obviously the location is a huge hindrance, how do they get from King's landing to Dragonstone? the gates are barred, there's a massive naval blockade, I guess they just teleport like every other character, whatever this is dumb but somewhat moot.

The Characters themselves though they have totally fucked up on. Ulf doesn't really matter they just showed him as a drunk braggart (accurate) but Hugh they have used this character to show the plight of the smallfolk in King's landing, being forced to work for Aegon but not getting paid for the steel, etc. This clearly sets him up as hating Aegon or at least having reason to fight against him. Except both of these characters immediately betray Rhaenyra and join Aegon's team the moment they have to face a dragon in combat, then they set themselves up, hugh especially, to try and take the throne since all the actual heirs are dead and gone at this point, so they just sit ruling tumbleton as kings until Addam sacrifices himself to take them out, killing them all.

Where did you get that they are going to merge Rhaena and Nettles? especially since they are going to have her accompany the two toddlers Aegon III and Viserys on the Gay Abandon when it gets captured by the Triarchy. This was a dumb change also but since the toddlers are too young to ride dragons and their dragons are too small to carry them anyway, it's obvious they are going to have Rhaena save Aegon III but not save Viserys so she can feel super sad about it and another one of Rhaenyra's blunders gets pawned off on a different character.

I figured they moved Sheepstealer to the Vale and have nettles be from the Vale, because that's where they end up retiring to after the war. Nettles and Sheepstealer end up living in a cave worshipped by the hill tribesman as a fire goddess.

The merge is on a Wiki of Ice and Fire. My guess is interpreted from Sheepsteeler being in the Eyrie while she is there, and the fact that a casting call never went out for Nettles. We should find out this week I imagine if Rhaena starts feeding sheep to him like I suspect she will.
 

Sylas

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well that would be yet another huge change from the book, but that's all this show is, radical changes from the book.
It does present a bunch of issues.

1. Who saves Aegon III? Does he just swim to shore? lol
2. If they abandon Nettle's storyline, What happens to sheepstealer? They have to kill him off if Rhaena is his rider, after all her egg is the last dragon egg to hatch (and the dragon lives), so if sheepstealer doesn't die, what happens to morning?
3. If they abandon Rhaena's storyline, what happens to morning? Does she just just fly off with sheapsteeler and live in the mountains worshipped by hill tribesman? She is one of only 3 known living Targaryans after the war.

Hopefully they don't show Daemon fucking his own daughter becoming her lover when the two of them get together to hunt for Aemond. I mean the show has a bunch of incest but geez idk, sister fucking is one thing, even niece fucking maybe but daughter fucking isn't going to go over that well especially for how young the actress appears that plays her
 

Juvarisx

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well that would be yet another huge change from the book, but that's all this show is, radical changes from the book.
It does present a bunch of issues.

1. Who saves Aegon III? Does he just swim to shore? lol
2. If they abandon Nettle's storyline, What happens to sheepstealer? They have to kill him off if Rhaena is his rider, after all her egg is the last dragon egg to hatch (and the dragon lives), so if sheepstealer doesn't die, what happens to morning?
3. If they abandon Rhaena's storyline, what happens to morning? Does she just just fly off with sheapsteeler and live in the mountains worshipped by hill tribesman? She is one of only 3 known living Targaryans after the war.

Hopefully they don't show Daemon fucking his own daughter becoming her lover when the two of them get together to hunt for Aemond. I mean the show has a bunch of incest but geez idk, sister fucking is one thing, even niece fucking maybe but daughter fucking isn't going to go over that well especially for how young the actress appears that plays her

The kids are too young and dragons too small on the show anyways for him to flee the Triarchy on his dragon, that was always going to have to change. Maybe they have Rhaena save them while the baby dragons fly away, or maybe the Triarchy doesn't capture them at all. At this point I think accepting that they are using what info there is in the book as a loose outline and changing characters to fit what they thinks works. Some has, some has not. Keep in mind noone knows for sure, we could see all of them on the boat to Essos next episode, but there is going to have to be major changes with them being too young to have any agency with the Triarchy.

My guess for the rest of the season is some sort of riot to free Hugh and Ulf, Rhaena bonding Sheepsteeler, the kids stay in the Eyrie with the guarantee they are protected since they have a dragon to protect them and Daemon finally heeding the Old Gods and becoming loyal to his family and a big reveal of the Hightower army with Daeron on Tessarion leading to a Black defeat in one way or another, as Hugh and Ulf come ashore on Dragonstone. Dunno if they show the Triarchy fighting Driftmark this season or not.
 

Sylas

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Yes they made them too young in the show, which is why when last episode they said that Rhaena would be traveling with the two boys on the Gay Abandon to Pentos I assumed that Rhaena would somehow save Aegon III, maybe adrift on some wreckage until they are picked up by Velaryon ships after the battle, and that Viserys would be "lost at sea" rather than Aegon escaping on Dragon back.

I have no idea why they would suddenly reintroduce sending the two youngest to Pentos for safe keeping after sending them to vale only to not follow through...that would be schizophrenic writing. Not saying they aren't, these writers are dog shit and don't really pay attention, just think it's more likely they will have Rhaena/Aegon/Viserys on the boat during the battle of the Gullet being the season end cap rather than, fuck all nothing happening but Rhaenyra whining why nobody will let her do anything for 2 more episodes and nothing happening.

god that would be such a colossal failure of a season if for the last 2 episodes again nothing fucking happens. They have 3 major battles that should take place in the timeline and I get they have to cut down and rearrange some of them to save money but to not have anything else happen but bullshit filler for the rest of this season, when so far its been 99% bullshit filler? fuck the 3rd season this show would get cancelled.

But they sure as fuck have been dragging out the bastards getting dragons, no idea why they are doing this it should of all happened last episode. I can see them dragging it out throughout episode 7 so that when they surprisingly Join the battle of the Gullet with the 4 additional dragons to turn the tide for shock value during the final episodes big battle sequence, only then to show the shock/horror of Jace and his dragon getting killed and Viserys assumed death being the finale
 
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Ossoi

Potato del Grande
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Another boring and pointless episode except for the last 10 minutes. What was the point of Alicent swimming?
 

Sylas

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episode 7 review, in spoilers. TLDR:
Yet another filler episode, 100% of the scenes are invented entirely for the show. just dragging ass at this point. Setting up the battle of the Gullet for the season finale.

again not sure why they are dragging out the bastards getting dragons or making this a big mystery, other than possibly for the shock value of the +4 dragon riders attacking the triarchy fleet during the battle of the gullet.

All this scene does is prove how retarded Rhaenyra is. Targaryans have known about there legions of bastards for centuries, they literally have a name for them, dragonseeds. It was always the plan to have bastards give it a shot at taming the dragons, because it's not that much of loss if the dragon doesn't take to them and burns them alive, rather than wasting king's guards and other knights.

idk whats this alicent scene even is?

ohh look Aemond sending king's guards to the wall. good thing they didn't name the random kings guard they invented, so that it doesn't matter when they exile them for the riot that the show invented.

oh look, the whole of the green council hasn't heard of fucking targ bastards either...again not sure why they are gunning for this angle?

and just to round out this stupid plotline, all the black council doesn't get it either...wtf are they trying to make this a mystery for. You literally have Rhaenyra's children who's dragon blood is so diluted that they have brown eyes and brown hair from fucking an upjumped guardsman made into a lord, and nobody bats an eye or thinks it's a problem when they can ride dragons but holy shit random bastards having enough dragonblood to ride dragons how could this possibly happen? They even made all the Velaryons mop heads to try and illustrate how much blood of Old Valyria still runs through their veins.

holy shit the stupid whore is the one to clue Rhaenyra in that Targaryans father bastards.. Jesus fucking christ it's about time. Again, literally targ bastards are so common they have a fucking name for them, dragonseeds. the show pointed this out a few episodes ago. damn this is some dense fucking writing.

the whole of dragonstone is littered with targ bastards, they were one of the main houses that practiced Prima Nocta. And unlike the rest of westeros, the commoners were more than willing, on the off chance that the new wife got pregnant with a dragonseed.

lemme back up a bit, the show really fucked up earlier this season when they made this huge thing about the dragons being worshipped as gods. That is 100% false. The dragons are feared, respected, maybe even revered a bit, but they are beasts, they are basically fighter jets, WMDs. Small folk daydream about what it must be like to ride on the back of a dragon, soaring in the sky and all, and having that kind of firepower at their fingertips, but they do NOT think the dragons are gods.

The Targaryans are nearly worshipped as gods. They are seen as far above normal men. They all have platinum silver hair (not blonde), they have damn near glowing purple eyes, they are immune to all disease (so Viserys contracting leprosy is retarded), and they have a bit of heat/fire resistance. They are basically Elves to these people, they are not seen as human.

Oh yeah, and they are also the only mother fuckers who can tame and ride dragons. That is why Targaryans are seen as damn near god like people.

ohhhh ok, I see. They are changing it so Rhaenyra is reluctant to call on the bastards to try and ride the dragons, and having the whore be the one to convince her. That way in a few episodes when the bastards turn traitor and abandon Rhaenyra she can totally call it, she was right all along, can't have her making any mistakes here no sir-ee.

ok finally riverlords are marching to harrenhal. Except the tully's weren't part of it. I mean I guess it doesn't really matter since they keep changing everything, but they don't march til the winter wolves arrive after the first of the riverlands armies is wiped out...I mean again doesn't really matter they keep changing everything, i'm sure no matter how many of them die, they will just magically be at full strength later in the story if the writers need them to be.

Ohh spoke too soon, this is just more time wasting, riverlords whining and shit, shitting on Daemon. maybe by season 4 they will manage to assemble. By this point in the book there has already been 2 major battles so far involving the riverlords. More whining, ok daemon executing the dude he sent to do the thing that they invented for the show so that more bullshit time wasting filler can happen yay.

nice Cryptkeeper scene, at this point though i'm not sure of the point? They've well established daemon's thoughts by now he did all this because he wanted the crown, no need to beat a dead horse here.

Aegon scene to show his progress so that when he sneaks out and escapes the castle in a few episodes it's not a wtf movement.

Corlys finally having a heart to heart with his bastard.

The two toddlers being escorted to the ship to head out, with Rhaena but she decides to fuck off on her own, looks like she might get merged with Nettles after all.

Oh look the adventures of Alicent camping in the woods? not sure wtf this is all about.

ohh look the bastard Jace freaking out about bastards trying to tame dragons. this is a 180 since of course he is the one who proposed it initially in the book.
Ahh ok he's upset about his legacy since he knows he is a bastard. I'm fine with this change actually, finally acknowledges the elephant in the room in a touching manner, he's insecure about his lineage if any random targ bastard can claim a dragon, since the majority of the targ bastards at least have the silver hair of old Valyria.

all the sneaking around and spycraft, this must be how they sneak out the dragonseeds. Yep. ok this is fine. Oh they want Hugh the Hammer to be cousin to Daemon? and its his mom who was targaryan? a whore? lol wtf. I Guess this is supposed to be Saera who fled to Essos and ran a pleasure house, she had bastards from the lords of Volantis and Lys. idk probably just making up a Targaryan here for the show. Also so I can see how they are going to have hugh switch sides. His wife flees to tumbleton to stay with family, she probably ends up getting killed in the battle of tumbleton, he blames Rhaenyra's side so he swaps to green. Ulf is just a drunk he follows suit cus why not. It was weird spending so much time with him trying to make him this honest noble blacksmith when he's just an evil cunt who craves power in the book.

And more of Alicent just camping and swimming, ok wtf.

Ok now there's supposed to be some kind of dragon priests and shit? wtf. Again this is all made up, the dragons aren't seen as gods, there are no dragon priests. the only people who interact with the dragons are the servants who feed them and the dragon riders themselves.

this whole Rhaenyra speech is ridiculous but ok, trying to make her this compassionate queen of the people and shit, lol. IDK why everyone is standing so close, fire breathing isn't single target there's going to be some AOE, spread out lol.

and yep lol, called it.

at least there is a bit of action happening this episode, still all filler but the dragon eating people is at least entertaining.

hrm this scene with Ulf on silverwing flying over king's landing is kinda lolsy. I guess using up the CGI budget but completely ruins the surprise that they have new riders for the dragons. Really fucking dumb, but ok.