Long full disclosure

I am feeling a, how you say, Roffle-waffle? What in the world would possess me to refuse a DNA test? If indeed Kevin is genetically mine, then the sooner I know this, the sooner custody proceedings may begin.
Yeah, I"m disabled, but let"s take into account what a judge will consider. Stable home? Check. Ability to parent? Check, demonstrated empirically with Ashley and my daughter. Psych shit? No biggie. Unlike Shelly, I have undergone and am continuing treatment, whereas she denies her diagnoses. Stable income? Check. Stable family? Check.

Sure, she may have family and friends come in to lie, but between their never being present to actually witness anything and Shelly"s ridiculous inability to get even her own story straight, that will lead to charges aainst her people and more lulz.

Physical capability to care for a child? Check. Shelly can"t even wash dishes. Intellectual capacity? Well, considering that when I researched WMS in case Kevin had it, she told me that all of the publications in the National Library of Medicine are lies and that no doctor knows what they"re talking about, I think I got that aspect covered too.

Then there"s the shit-ton of crazy that she has vomitted all over the Internet, lovingly preserved in screencaps and the Retard Rickshaw courtesy of the fine people at Fires of Heaven. On top of all this, there"s witnesses to her character whom can vouch for her suicidal and emotionally abusive history.

So, this is why I"ve asked for a DNA test. But take my money? Laughing out loud like I"m on a cloud, no. Haha, goodness no. But I hope she does get into school because the hit to her income will hurt.

By the way, according to what she told Ashley, "Chase" is (at different times) a cop, lawyer, and doctor. Considering that when I called to settle that $500, find out what she and Ashley were discussing, and suggest a DNA test, she started with how she loves and misses me, Chase may not exist. Then again, considering that she told Ashley she"s already pregnant again and she justified cheating by saying it "hurts" if she don"t have sex at least once a day, there may be something to this Chase stuff.

However, when the Spring semester had already started, she was NOT in school and claimed that she was studying French, Spanish, Portuguese, and Latin. So, if she is studying, it"s through an organization without semesters that accepts students with no English skills or allows just anyone to jump into any class at any time. The only classes I know of that fit that are community service classes on personal finance management that, admittedly, social services may be forcing her to attend since she has a child.

Despite her attempts to humiliate me, her stalking, her lies (seriously, period blood? Good troll attempt but fucking SICK!), I will again lay out her best options.

1. Take David back. He"s a fruit loop, but he genuinely loves her.

2. Pretend to have never known me. If Kevin is mine, then my finding that out would be the biggest threat to her dream of a Brady-like home possible, due to what I outlined above.

3. Get counseling. That is, unless she enjoys having nightmares about her deceased cousin whom she was in love with and failing at every interpersonal relationship she"s beyond lucky enough to find.

4. At least take remedial English courses to gain a smidgen of respect in electronic and written communications, and maybe some psychology and sociology courses to learn how to be sociable and altruistic.

BUT she will heed none of this, mark my words.