Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Would you be mad at the dude if he was considered a family friend who has known you for 25 years or whatever Mrs g said?
I certainly would
I certainly would
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Marriage and the Power of Divorce
- Thread starter Grumpus
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moonarchia
The Scientific Shitlord
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It's quite possible to get your physical and emotional needs met by someone who is married. It does come with risks, obviously, but someone else's marriage only matters as much as the other party wants it to. If they're down with it, that's go time if it's what you want too.
iannis
Musty Nester
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Yeah, there's no real good that will come out of an affair with a married man.
I can tell you exactly why these men are showing interest. You are no risk. You are the merry widow. They can get away from their unhappy domestic situation and go have some romance/sex with a woman who isn't going to expect them to leave her or tell him that they should or, really, make any demand on them whatsoever.
And when it inevitably ends badly, the worst case for them is that they have to go back to their hag wife. They're not looking to cheat because they're happy. But they're not so unhappy that they're looking to be divorced.
This sort of thing comes with an opportunity cost. Forget the various ways that an affair can go. Pay some attention to what is outside the circle.
But oh, it's tempting to be an adulterer sometimes. There is a reason why "don't do that" is one of the big ten, however. It is, genuinely, a bad idea.
I can tell you exactly why these men are showing interest. You are no risk. You are the merry widow. They can get away from their unhappy domestic situation and go have some romance/sex with a woman who isn't going to expect them to leave her or tell him that they should or, really, make any demand on them whatsoever.
And when it inevitably ends badly, the worst case for them is that they have to go back to their hag wife. They're not looking to cheat because they're happy. But they're not so unhappy that they're looking to be divorced.
This sort of thing comes with an opportunity cost. Forget the various ways that an affair can go. Pay some attention to what is outside the circle.
But oh, it's tempting to be an adulterer sometimes. There is a reason why "don't do that" is one of the big ten, however. It is, genuinely, a bad idea.
I wouldn't be happy but it's her choice not his. It's this guys choice in this scenario she is talking about.
The person cheating is the only one I find at fault.
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Mrs. Gravy
Quite Saucy
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Yes, this is the sentiment that most aligns with mine and why, when I saw him and his wife today at an event that I coordinated, I made it clear that it wouldn't be happening. So I run in very polite circles, but am a very social person and EVERYONE gets a greeting and usually a hug from me. The wife made a disparaging remark about me and the ways I am with people - it was overheard by my very good friends, I though they were going to take her out back and show her how to be polite. They did not; we just ignored her instead.
The rest of the day was fucking awesome, as I was totally hit on by the single sommelier (mind you, he was smoking hot, single and 35, so 16 years my junior) AND I got asked out by an old school mate (also currently single) I have not seen in forever. It was a VERY good day for Mrs. G. So glad I wore the tight pants!
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moonarchia
The Scientific Shitlord
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Hoss
Make America's Team Great Again
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You should cut off all contact with him. Especially any contact where you have an opportunity to be alone together.
Oblio
Utah
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For some reason I don't think Sheryl Crow had adultery in mind when she wrote this.
TrollfaceDeux
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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Holy fuck
Anyway this whole situation is ridiculous. If i were her i wouldn't let this shit go this far in the first place. This is fucking teenager shit. Honest to god truth.
Mrs. Gravy
Quite Saucy
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I think the situation has helped me open my eyes again to the interesting truths about people and to some about myself as well.
I appreciate the varied input, especially the well-reasoned remarks.
I appreciate the varied input, especially the well-reasoned remarks.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Don't forget a_skeleton_03 is a guy that thought it was ok to post pictures of his friends half naked wife here after fixing her computer. Moral compass may be out of whack or something
Something to do with whacking anyways
Something to do with whacking anyways
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moonarchia
The Scientific Shitlord
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Morality is a subjective thing. At the end of the day it's you who has to live with the choices you make. If you're not OK as the "other woman", that's cool. If you had chosen the other option that would have been cool too. The only person doing anything shady would have been the guy, since he would be cheating.
The body wants what the body wants. I hope you find happiness again, whatever that entails.
If you ever give up the dating game, you can always slay pixels with us in WOW.
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How is morality in question?
If a person leaves out $1,000 and someone steals it you complain about the thief ...
If a person cheats it's on them, getting mad at the other person only serves to try and shift the blame off the cheater.
"Yeah my wife cheated on me but hey I really blame the dude that was too hot for her to stay faithful. Not like she has control of her own body and decisions."
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Adebisi
Clump of Cells
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Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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You can blame both you know. In my specific example it was a family friend you've known for years. I think it's ok to be pissed at your wife but also mad at your friend.
Eidal
Molten Core Raider
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Agreed. Men angry at the man that seduced their wife are using anger to replace more miserable emotions.
Edit: if it was a friend of mine, then I'd be angry because he essentially chose an orgasm over a long friendship. If it's some stranger, then what I wrote above applies.
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