Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Mrs. Gravy said:

Whew...long post to follow:
I didn't hold it against him...I just needed to know what the deal was. I have a social life outside of him and I work a fuckton so knowing how much he was going to put into it helped me to know how much I should. If I am a place holder, I could live with that, but I don't seem to be for now. I do like him more than other men I know; enough to turn down other opportunities. He is extremely smart and very funny (I am a sucker smart/funny) he is physically attractive and healthy and we have some shared interests and ambitions. Because I like him, I will make efforts to show that, singular attention is my way. I am not good at multisexing. It feels disingenuous FROM me. I don't expect everyone to be like me, I understand they aren't. Also, from a health point of view...it's good to know the level of precaution
So, I see absolutely nothing wrong with me asking.
Also...you should know thay I checked him out (public records etc...a girl has to be somewhat cautious) before our first date...AND on that date, I TOLD him that I did.
He got a clue as to my level of openness and that I am fairly forthright. I also told him that I consulted all of you in re his early intetaction with me. He is actually the only person in my world who is aware of your existence.
So, that first time, after several dates and an overnight, I asked, but I didn't push it. But we are getting together more often ..actually when ever our schedules allow...and spending nights together so I needed to ask again. I am not looking too far into any future and I am continuing to just enjoy my time with him and seeing if it progresses. Again, it helps me to know how much effort to make. He is worth that much and so am I.

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So how'd he answer?

I don't need much to get me going or in the mood. I generally agree that outfits don't do much, although certain stripperish things my wife owns just look sexy as fuck. To me, it's more about how it makes my wife feel. She feels super naughty buying an outfit she knows she'll be wearing just for me. It's a big surprise from her to me and I think it makes her feel super sexy doing it. Whenever she wears one she's a beast in the sack, like it has been building up for hours, or days, or however long ago she bought it.

So while the outfits don't particularly drive me crazy, I know it makes her feel good. I always play it up too, because I think it makes her get turned on. I spend some time commenting on it and how it makes her look. She has probably 5 pairs of lingerie and a couple stripper uniforms (best description I can give. It's something you'd see in a club ), and I've never once asked her to buy them or wear them.

At least someone's doing it

It was 11 thank you very much

Mrs. Gravy said:

In a manner worth my effort and singular focus. It is casual and laid back 'dating' but neither of us are seeking others right now. If either of us aren't into it I am hopeful that we will just say so. Well, we know I will and I am pretty sure he will too. For now, I am into it. He's a lot of fun and he makes my engine purr.

(Also - sorry for all the typos on the earlier posts - I suck at keying from my phone...)

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.....? So in other words you did exactly what I suggested and didn't hold it against him. As for the rest of that stuff I could careless what question you were asking him. You could have been demanding to know if he could be a KC fan and I'm sure you would have good reasons for that as well.

chaos said:

I never got the whole sexy outfit thing. For public, sure, I love looking at hot women as much as the next guy. But like slutty cheerleader outfits or lingerie or whatever, I was never really into it. Oh hey, nice lingerie. How long do I have to humor you before we take that off and start putting things in asses?

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Yeah. For the most part. Garters though, real garters. That's basically holding up a "please rape me" sign.

Lots of fancy underoos just make me laugh though. On the inside. I'm not a complete moron.

Update:

Well, there's no big drama account to tell, so if you were hoping for something juicy, nothing huge happened. If you're still interested this is what happened...

I ended up breaking up with her 4 days before she left. Like Mrs. G said, I think her intuition did have her wondering something was wrong, but not how wrong, as I kind of expected. During the next few days we had good moments, bad moments, uncomfortable moments. I basically got to witness many of those reactions or stages of grief we've all had during a difficult break up. That was tough on me, at the end of the day I still care about the girl, but I can really see now why it would have been much easier to wait till the end (or even wait till she left).

It also made me learn that there wasn't really a right or wrong answer as far as waiting for her to leave and then break up, or before. There were many times I could tell she would have preferred for me to wait, others where she was thankful I didn't. In my opinion I think I should have maybe waited one more day, two at the most. But I'm glad I didn't break up with her the very last day or after she left, I think that decision will feel better in the long run for both of us.

Anyway, thanks all for the different words and attention. I began the story to just air my thoughts out, and also just in case there would be an unlikely scenario where something crazy would happen, but I'm sincerely glad it really didn't.

lawl. your little young thing just called you old.

a_skeleton_02 said:

She calls me old all the time.

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Just when she wants the funnel?