Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Cad

Cad

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Picasso3 said:
She didn't say anything about talking separately, it was like she was calling for advice....
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So for a couples therapist, the "client" is the couple, not either spouse. It's fairly unethical for the therapist to see or talk to the other party individually without notifying both people and getting the okay, and even then you don't talk to them individually about their individual problems, only things as it relates to therapy. To say to the wife that she "doesn't know what to do with you" is blatantly taking the side of the wife and casting you as unreasonable, which to me is highly unprofessional and unethical (as lurking said).

Where did you find this therapist and what are their qualifications?
 
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Tenks

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She got her certificate in Appalachian Feelin' Talker from WVU tyvm
 
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Khane

Khane

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Sounds like this train is headin to threesome town.
 
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Tarrant

Tarrant

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To make matters worse if you ask her for you both to see a different therapist you're only going to reaffirm what's she's saying.
 
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Picasso3

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I don't think so. We talked about how she didn't seem very sharp after the first session. I was kind of hoping to get some serious analysis of my mental health and instead we just talked about laundry and cooking.

I can see her getting recommended by a coworker or something
 
Zaara

Zaara

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Licensed therapist calling one of the clients of a joint therapy session to actually talk shit about the other one.

Lady's a hack. You haven't been doing this long enough to have her express doubts about the efficacy of her therapy, much less in a manner so unprofessional as a fucking phone call to your wife. This shit is going to cause more harm than good.
 
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TJT

TJT

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So a few years ago I told y'all how my long term girlfriend broke up with me out of the blue. Been dating for five years and had no intention of breaking up with her. She goes to some conference and bangs an Australian dude, which I didn't particularly care about as we had an arrangement about such things specifically, and tells me she's in love with him and breaks up with me. It's been like two years or something since then?

Anyway, she called me last night and tried to tell me that she really didn't love that guy, which was obvious from the start and she just made it up to get away from me for some reason. Now she feels really bad about it and it was guilting her up or something. I'm not one to hold a grudge or care at this point and I tell her that. Then I get this long crying spiel about how I was right and it would be hard to find someone who was willing to do as much for her as I did and be reliable and supportive. As I got her through university, got her out of debt, let her drive my car for a year and then got her a car later, got her a really good job and a bunch of other shit. So she misses me a lot and thinks about me all the time and is not happy with her life now. She realizes she was happier with me.

God. Seems she lives in Seattle now with some Mexican elementary schoolteacher and his two sons. No idea how that happened and I didn't ask. But I told her she should probably get her shit together and refrain from calling me like this again.
 
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Picasso3

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Zaara said:
Licensed therapist calling one of the clients of a joint therapy session to actually talk shit about the other one.

Lady's a hack. You haven't been doing this long enough to have her express doubts about the efficacy of her therapy, much less in a manner so unprofessional as a fucking phone call to your wife. This shit is going to cause more harm than good.
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At the beginning of the session she said she just needed to get to know us at that point. During the session everything seemed fine, my wife did most of the talking. The only questionable moment we had was she called me out for looking at my watch and I told her I naturally scan and she needed more stuff on her walls and that was ok. She giggled some after that so i didn't think it was a big deal.

Wife told me she didn't know what to do and just said i broke the therapist. We're currently scheduled for another one next week.

She's cute but 40 something. Graduated college in 1994.
 
lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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TJT said:
Then I get this long crying spiel about how I was right and it would be hard to find someone who was willing to do as much for her as I did and be reliable and supportive. As I got her through university, got her out of debt, let her drive my car for a year and then got her a car later, got her a really good job and a bunch of other shit. So she misses me a lot and thinks about me all the time and is not happy with her life now. She realizes she was happier with me.
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Yeah, she doesn't miss you. She misses the stuff you got her.
 
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TJT

TJT

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lurkingdirk said:
Yeah, she doesn't miss you. She misses the stuff you got her.
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Well she can enjoy life on the schoolteacher salary I guess! I don't know much about Seattle but I do hear that Renton is kind of ghetto where she's living.
 
Ryoz

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Yup, definitely just misses the lifestyle you provided. Fun while it lasted but true colors were shown - peace!
 
TJT

TJT

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Ryoz said:
Yup, definitely just misses the lifestyle you provided. Fun while it lasted but true colors were shown - peace!
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That part is what did irritate me. We met when we were, relatively, broke. I was in university living off the GI Bill and went through that growth phase that meant a lot to me. But then it all ended up being about money? People wonder why I don't try to understand women.
 
Khane

Khane

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Picasso3 said:
At the beginning of the session she said she just needed to get to know us at that point. During the session everything seemed fine, my wife did most of the talking. The only questionable moment we had was she called me out for looking at my watch and I told her I naturally scan and she needed more stuff on her walls and that was ok. She giggled some after that so i didn't think it was a big deal.

Wife told me she didn't know what to do and just said i broke the therapist. We're currently scheduled for another one next week.

She's cute but 40 something. Graduated college in 1994.
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Some people just can't be therapized Picasso. Doesn't help if she likes you and giggles at your jokes. Bet you messed her all up inside.
 
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