Marriage and the Power of Divorce
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
iannis
Musty Nester
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Meh. Onoes married her right out of high school, they've been married for over a decade. I'm sure that some of it is trying to manipulate him into jealousy or some sort of female headgame, but I'm also sure that part of it is just genuine friendship and an understanding between two people that have shared significant aspects of their lives for a significant period. He knows her better than anyone and she knows him the same. Besides for the gradual aversion to sex and a touch of grass-is-greener envy, it sounds like the two of them have a pretty fucking admirable relationship.
And that's what makes it dangerous, Onoes! It would be a lot easier to defend against cheap female manipulation. RUUUUUUUUUUN.
And that's what makes it dangerous, Onoes! It would be a lot easier to defend against cheap female manipulation. RUUUUUUUUUUN.
Joeboo
Molten Core Raider
- 8,157
- 140
Well, he's a bigger man than me. I don't have any ex-wives, but I have plenty of ex-girlfriends from long-term relationships (3+ years) and there isn't a damn one of them that I would want to discuss in detail who they were boning right after we broke up. Fuck all of that.
Onoes
Trakanon Raider
- 1,460
- 1,225
Hahah, ok, so how about this? Last night I ended up working late. I called my now "sex friend" girl, well text her, at just after 11 and said "Are you still up? I'd like to stop by."
I stop by and within a few minutes we are in her bathroom pulling our clothes off (her daughter was asleep in her bed, so bathroom was the temp solution). We are making out and pulling our clothes off, and I pick her up by the legs and set her ass on the counter, and just thrust into her (I was being a little rough/manly because A.) I wanted to be in her, and B.) She's given me the impression shes into that). She gasps and says "Ohhhh you didn't want me to suck you?" and I say "I do, just let me feel you for a minute first". I fucked her kind of hard for like 10 minutes on the counter, then tell her I want her to suck me. She does that for a while, then I stand her up and spin her around, ask her to grab her ankles, and I fuck her doggystyle for a bit. I then turn her so her chest is up on the bathroom counter, still standing doggy behind her, grab a fistfull of her hair and pull her head up and back. I fuck with reckless abandon while watching her watch me in the mirror. Great orgasm. We have to get 2 towels to sop up all her juices all over the floor.
So that was my night.
I get home and check the mail at like 1am. I got a letter saying my oldest son is accepted to a school I REALLY wanted him to get into for Kindergarten this year. I text my X-wife this morning, and she asks me if we can go to the school to fill out the paperwork today. I met her there a couple hours ago and we fill out paperwork, and get along fine. I tell her I'm headed to Chipotle next, and she asks if I mind if she goes, that sounds great. We have lunch together. I ask her if she might want the kids any tomorrow, as it's my day, but I'm painting the house, so I'm not really spending time with them, SO, if she wants to do anything with them its fine. She tells me she can't because she is going back to Vegas. I say "Ohh going on another date with that Match.com guy?" and she tells me no, that its a different guy. She talks about that for a while, and asks how I'm doing. I just say "You know, same old same old, not really dating yet."
Because again, Yeah, I could probably hurt her, I'm sure it would hurt her if she had any idea, but, why do I care? Yeah, the no blowjobs for 11 years was fucking rough, and finding out shes blowing guys right out the door is pretty fucking annoying, but yeah... I mean just last night, just 1 half hour bathroom sex thing, WAY better, WAY more fun than anything we ever had. There's no hang ups and insecurity. So she's fucking other dudes?
Could. Care. Less.
Have fun with "that" guys, I'm doing a-ok over here.
I stop by and within a few minutes we are in her bathroom pulling our clothes off (her daughter was asleep in her bed, so bathroom was the temp solution). We are making out and pulling our clothes off, and I pick her up by the legs and set her ass on the counter, and just thrust into her (I was being a little rough/manly because A.) I wanted to be in her, and B.) She's given me the impression shes into that). She gasps and says "Ohhhh you didn't want me to suck you?" and I say "I do, just let me feel you for a minute first". I fucked her kind of hard for like 10 minutes on the counter, then tell her I want her to suck me. She does that for a while, then I stand her up and spin her around, ask her to grab her ankles, and I fuck her doggystyle for a bit. I then turn her so her chest is up on the bathroom counter, still standing doggy behind her, grab a fistfull of her hair and pull her head up and back. I fuck with reckless abandon while watching her watch me in the mirror. Great orgasm. We have to get 2 towels to sop up all her juices all over the floor.
So that was my night.
I get home and check the mail at like 1am. I got a letter saying my oldest son is accepted to a school I REALLY wanted him to get into for Kindergarten this year. I text my X-wife this morning, and she asks me if we can go to the school to fill out the paperwork today. I met her there a couple hours ago and we fill out paperwork, and get along fine. I tell her I'm headed to Chipotle next, and she asks if I mind if she goes, that sounds great. We have lunch together. I ask her if she might want the kids any tomorrow, as it's my day, but I'm painting the house, so I'm not really spending time with them, SO, if she wants to do anything with them its fine. She tells me she can't because she is going back to Vegas. I say "Ohh going on another date with that Match.com guy?" and she tells me no, that its a different guy. She talks about that for a while, and asks how I'm doing. I just say "You know, same old same old, not really dating yet."
Because again, Yeah, I could probably hurt her, I'm sure it would hurt her if she had any idea, but, why do I care? Yeah, the no blowjobs for 11 years was fucking rough, and finding out shes blowing guys right out the door is pretty fucking annoying, but yeah... I mean just last night, just 1 half hour bathroom sex thing, WAY better, WAY more fun than anything we ever had. There's no hang ups and insecurity. So she's fucking other dudes?
Could. Care. Less.
Have fun with "that" guys, I'm doing a-ok over here.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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- 15,110
This fuckin' guy. THIS. FUCKIN'. GUY.
It's "couldn't care less" bro. Bet your ex-wife put that "could care less " shit in your head. Fuck that biatch.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
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Tarrant
<Prior Amod>
- 15,801
- 9,212
that line finished me off twice by itself. lindz doesn't know what she's talking about.
Tuco
I got Tuco'd!
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Tarrant
<Prior Amod>
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lindz
#DDs
- 1,201
- 63
The sex sounds fun, don't get me wrong. The description alone doesn't do it for me though.
Stupid female sex drives and all.
Now make that writing more erotic... that'll do me.
Husband and I were talking about this last night actually. We've done the porn thing and it's been fun. But I've found it is only really good when we're more psychologically into it. The actual visuals don't do all that much for me. But when it is a fantasy we have been talking about, or is stimulating psychologically in another way, it is incredibly hot. Reading erotica does a similar thing for women I think. Allow us to have a psychological connection to the sex which turns us on.
Now make that writing more erotic... that'll do me.
Husband and I were talking about this last night actually. We've done the porn thing and it's been fun. But I've found it is only really good when we're more psychologically into it. The actual visuals don't do all that much for me. But when it is a fantasy we have been talking about, or is stimulating psychologically in another way, it is incredibly hot. Reading erotica does a similar thing for women I think. Allow us to have a psychological connection to the sex which turns us on.
Adebisi
Clump of Cells
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iannis
Musty Nester
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