Gravel
Mr. Poopybutthole
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Marriage and the Power of Divorce
- Thread starter Grumpus
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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My fianc? just kept putting it off because she was afraid our dog would freak out. Last night I just said "fuck it" in my head and woke her up from a dead sleep and threw on the charm. Fucked like monkeys. Dog jumped on the bed to see what was up since it didn't want to be left out, then it was just like "oh you're fucking, good night" and went back to bed. It was awesome.
Sometimes you gotta just gotta fuck in front of your pets man.
Sometimes you gotta just gotta fuck in front of your pets man.
Vlett
Lord Nagafen Raider
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The joke in our house is that our huskies (2yr old and 12 week old, both females) try to "cuddle" with my wife after sex. It's really fucking weird.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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My dog was a total creeper, it sat on the floor for a couple minutes (in pitch darkness) looking me dead in the eyes as I went to town. Then afterwards it walks around smelling the air in the room like "wtf is this aroma"
Namon
Blackwing Lair Raider
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After a couple days to let them wind down (I basically opened my home to give them a place to get away from everything to get their head on straight), I honestly believe there are two issues here. Issue A: if a spouse is involved in self destructive behavior (addictions etc), then you absolutely cannot be an enabler or things will spiral out of control. Issue B: and this is the huge one in this case... ends up spouse is actually gay and being from the 50's and 60's that meant you married a little woman and punched out a couple of kids. Unfortunately that also means you live a lifetime that is a lie. It's confusing because I feel sorry that he had to live suppressed for so long, but at the same time, if you know women aren't your thing why not just stay a bachelor? There is no easy answer for that, and I don't expect one. It's just been a long week and I'm exhausted now.It is so mind boggling to hear about those type of situations. How do people hide stuff after being together for so long? After 9 years together I feel like I know my husband so well that I could tell if there was a change in something especially something as big as that. It seems at that point, the other party is choosing to ignore the wrong behavior for whatever reason. Likely because they don't want to have to deal with the hurt if it comes out in the open.
Not to mention just the respect part of it, 34 years and to respect your partner so little that you are hiding something you know is not right for your relationship...
I guess I'm still living in happy land and I'd like to keep it that way.
DickTrickle
Definitely NOT Furor Planedefiler
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Is there not a door to your bedroom? Why not close it? Or will it go crazy that it can't get in?
BoldW
Molten Core Raider
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Dogs are dogs, so I've never been creeped out having sex in front of them. The older one knows and gets off the bed to lay at the foot. The younger one, spoiled rotten, believes the bed is hers so unless we physically pushed her off, was fine just laying in whatever space is available (King bed so not too difficult).
My wife was always into the "rape fantasy" thing (see Louis CK) so I could generally get her in the mood by just bending her over the kitchen counter and pulling her panties down. My being in a bad mood made it even better for her. Weird.
My wife was always into the "rape fantasy" thing (see Louis CK) so I could generally get her in the mood by just bending her over the kitchen counter and pulling her panties down. My being in a bad mood made it even better for her. Weird.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Will go crazy for certain, and we live in an apartment so it's not good if it's going crazy late at night.
Story of my parents pretty much; father married my mom and spent 30 years in the closet, when all of the kids left home my mom was bored and couldn't get "action" so she went all Sherlock on him and found out that he had a boyfriend on the side and a bachelor pad for him and his boyfriend...
Divorced him so fast he ended up with nothing. To this day my father denies publicly that he's gay (although we know, and we've seen the emails, evidence, etc), he was so adamant as to try to prove that he's not gay that he even said to the divorce court/judge "To prove I'm not gay I'll submit to an HIV test" we all facepalmed.
My mom would tell us: "I don't care if he's gay, it's the lie that gets you... that you think you knew someone for so long... I could've rebuilt my life long time ago, now I'm in my 70's..."
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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This wedding planning shit is making me want to go to a farm and kick a horse right in its fucking smug face. Shit is for the birds.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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That's basically what I'm doing. I'm trying to watch TV and all I can hear is her yammering on about some stupid bullshit flower not looking right. I would get married at a McDonalds if she let me to save money.
We hired a planner because the minutia would drive my fiancee nuts as she is a perfectionist and slightly OCD, didn't want to live with that. Now she just answers questions and lets the planner handle the details... been a big win so far!
Gravel
Mr. Poopybutthole
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We had a small ceremony with about 14 people on the shore of a lake. In total it cost about $450, the bulk of which was taking everyone out to dinner for our "reception." Never regretted it even a tiny bit. In fact, we always laugh at jackholes like you who go all out and stress the fuck out. Oh, and her family gave us $5000 I think since they didn't have to spend it on a wedding no one wanted.
Joeboo
Molten Core Raider
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That's pretty much my mom. My parents got divorced after 30 years of marriage(my dad was cheating). At that point, my mom was almost 60 years old, so she had no desire to try to start a new life with someone else. She's just been single for the last 10 years now. I don't think she'll ever get over it though, she's still super bitter every time the subject comes up, Mostly because they had built a business together over those 30 years(my dad owned it, but she worked there since day 1 as his secretary, she actually put in more hours than he did, she was always willing to schedule after-hours appointments with customers when my dad never would) and while he still has a very nice 6-figure income, my mom gets like 2 grand a month in alimony. She does get quite a bit of his social security and retirement/401k once he retires, but the last 10 years have kinda sucked living on 24K a year + her part time job as a secretary(who wants to hire someone who is 60 who doesnt have a real work reference other than her ex husband in the last 30 years? Not many people, that's who)
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Believe it or not, that was the original plan... then she started watching bridal shows. Now it is a $15K affair.
Kirun
Buzzfeed Editor
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So, you let her wear the pants? You're in for a world of hurt, my friend. I look forward to your posts in the GWBYHT thread.