When my wife and I were engage and dating, she used to call me/text me/gchat me all day during work. I had to lay down the law with that one. I told her she was not allowed to call me ever before I get home from work unless it's an emergency or she needed to ask me to pick something up on the way home.
Got that shit cleaned up real quick!
It's funny because I was just thinking about this. Texting is so easy, and I feel like I'm good at it (aka smooth), but I'm wondering if its hurting me in the long run. With the crazy girl it was non stop, 24/7 texting. Even when I was asleep, I would wake up to 18 missed texts every day. At the time, I was JUST getting divorced, and super thrilled to be fucking, and I didn't care at all. It was positive attention, and I loved it.
I haven't mentioned it here, because nothing is going to come of it, but another girl from highschool, who was kind of a sex buddy situation thing for a couple months, found me on Facebook and started talking to me. She lives like 1,500 miles away, so other than a one time thing or whatever, I know it's just a "for fun" thing. Well, we started talking about a month and a half ago, and it was really nice to have girl banter, back and forth flirting again. I ended up talking to her, well, Facebook messaging, for 3 straight hours. Next night it was 5. By the second night she is telling me how she's never been with anyone who compared to me, and that I'm basically her fantasy. One of her lines was "I can still remember how your cum taste's, sometimes I suck on my fingers while I masterbate and imagine its you."
So yeah, obviously I've been enjoying talking to her. Well, we end up text masterbating together, and it was fun enough, but also kind of a pain (hard to relax and really get into it when you are typing, reading, and trying to help the other person out as well), and that seemed to signify the change. The next day she's texting me at all hours. I'm happy, she's apparently happy, I don't think much of it. But... it never stops. Sometimes I respond, but sometimes I don't, because, you know, at work.
I tell her I can't really keep up with her via texts, and maybe I can just give her a call at night or something? She's very hesitant, but agrees. I call her that night, and its pretty much a trainwreck. She's super shy and barely talking. When she does talk its usually stuff like "Why aren't you saying nice things about me? You're always so flattering in text, but all you've been doing is talking about yourself." Um... you aren't talking, so I'm trying to start some kind of conversation. Anyway, we still talk for about 2 hours but its not enjoyable.
The next day she says she thinks we should go back to texting because she's too nervous to talk to me on the phone, and I'm so much more lovey over texts. I say sure, but just don't expect me to really respond until night.
Couple of weeks go by and she's kind of gotten nagging and guilt trippy about me not paying enough attention to her. Most of the time when I get a text from her anymore I just kind of sigh before even looking at it, knowing it's going to be some not so subtle "I miss you, what happened, do you hate me?" stuff, and I'm kind of over the part where I feel obligated to tell her how great everything is every day, and what a fantastic person she is or whatever.
So, Friday before last, 10 days ago I guess, I had a big long 2 hour convo with her about how I want to scale our communication back, and stay friends, but just know that I really can't devote hours of my day to her anymore. She didn't take it super well, crying and the like, but I tried very hard to let her down as easy as possible, and kept reassuring her everythings fine, I'm just busy. So, since then, she has initiated texts with me twice, and both times started with something like "I know I'm not supposed to be talking to you or whatever, and I''ll go back to being silent in a minute, but wanted to let you know about whatever..." and basically was just sharing news or whatever, an excuse to talk, but by starting it like that I'm immediately annoyed. If she just sent a "Guess what! I just got picked for whatever!" I would have talked and it all would have been fine, but her attempt at guilt tripping me like that is really stupid.
After the second time I told her that. I answered and talked to her like normal for 10 minutes, and then as the conversation was ending I told her that if she wants to keep the "us being cool friends" aspect open she needs to stop trying to make me feel bad when we talk. She got a little pissy and responded she didn't know what she was supposed to do, apparently everything she does is wrong, she's in trouble for talking to me and now apparently for mentioning not talking to me, she's sorry, she has a headache, goodbye.
That was last Thursday and she hasn't written since.
So, not the most exciting story, but its what I've been up to, and the point of it was, I'm thinking that in the future I'm just going to tell people I don't really like texting or talking on the phone a lot, so go in knowing that.
