Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Famm

Famm

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Elurin_sl said:
Holy fuck is that true. I probably had at least a dozen married guys tell me not to do it. I was just like, fuck you guys, you don't know what you're talking about. 10 years later...
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Behold, Noodles....the future of you!
 
Grumpus

Grumpus

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Eomer_sl said:
Meh, I would think that someone who truly "gets it" would say to themselves "man, getting involved with that kind of bullshit when you're a full on atheist is just going to lead to the relationship's failure eventually." But what do I know?

Seriously though, that's one aspect that I'm not quite sure the implications of. What will her JW family think of your religious views? You were born a JW correct? I would assume they're aware of that. How do you plan on dealing with that? Are they going to expect you in church every week? I don't really know much about JW's, to be honest. What's your girlfriend's views? Is she a true believe, atheist, or somewhere in between? I'm genuinely curious about the dynamics of how that will all fit together.
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Her family likes me, I spend every other Friday at their house because my head coach lives in the same town so I travel and stay with them on weekends. They know i'm an atheist. I stay with them so I can fight all weekend and I have a huge beard. They don't care. I have been friends with them my whole life.

Shes indoctrinated, she goes because she has to go. I grew up with this shit, if she wants to go when we are together i'm fine with that. She has her religious views I have mine. I go to BJJ 6 nights a week who am I to say she can' go to church 3 nights a week or whatever. She knows my stance and doesn't care.

She has been extremely sheltered and I assume once shes out from under the protection of her bubble she will figure it out for herself over time. I don't plan on trying to convince her one way or the other though unless she asks questions i'm keeping my mouth shut.
 
Grumpus

Grumpus

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As far as everyone else being all doom and gloom. You can't understand because you were never a JW and its what I have to work with. I'm trying to live my life the best way I can. Is it ideal? Nope. Ideally my parents wouldn't have raised me in a fucking cult.

I came back to this thread and admitted I was wrong. There are people out there worth marrying and I found one and i'm going to make it work.
 
TomServo

TomServo

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All that aside, It is sooo fucking creepy that you say you have known her for 19 years.... Like were you sizing her up as an infant or something? yeesh
 
ZyyzYzzy

ZyyzYzzy

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You should stop getting road dome. What if it causes you 2 to get into an accident? She won't have her seat belt on, then will need a blood transfusion. What then?!
 
Khane

Khane

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Grumpus_sl said:
I came back to this thread and admitted I was wrong. There are people out there worth marrying and I found one and i'm going to make it work.
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So you went from not believing in marriage to wanting to marry a 19 year old in... 6 months. Anyway, good luck. The odds are stacked heavily against you.
 
Grumpus

Grumpus

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grumblethorn_sl said:
All that aside, It is sooo fucking creepy that you say you have known her for 19 years.... Like were you sizing her up as an infant or something? yeesh
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Have I not know her for 19 years? I could have lied. We started working together like 7 months ago. Before that I never thought of her in any capacity beyond friends what so ever.

Just a side point her which made me go meh on the age thing, the dude she was seeing before me was 29.

Khane_sl said:
So you went from not believing in marriage to wanting to marry a 19 year old in... 6 months. Anyway, good luck. The odds are stacked heavily against you.
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She's living with her girlfriend for 6 months minimum. That's our game plan for starting to talk about marriage. We are not getting married in exactly 6 months.
 
Khane

Khane

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No... you've been dating for 6 months. And before you met her you didn't believe in marriage from what you're saying. So in 6 months you went from "fuck marriage" to "this is the one".

Just a side point her which made me go meh on the age thing, the dude she was seeing before me was 29.
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What? Do you actually read the shit you're writing as a "defense" of yourself?
 
Grumpus

Grumpus

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Khane_sl said:
What? Do you actually read the shit you're writing as a "defense" of yourself?
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Yes I do. I fairly obviously give 0 fucks. I don't have a problem with age difference in relationships.

Anyone that has seen me post here knows I don't just go around posting random nonsense.

You have different views on life then me, oh my god rabble rabble rabble. I don't care.
 
TomServo

TomServo

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I really like your haircut man, but you have posted nothing but nonsense in this thread. You are pussy crazed and that's about it.
 
Grumpus

Grumpus

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grumblethorn_sl said:
I really like your haircut man, but you have posted nothing but nonsense in this thread.
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Nonsense to someone who doesn't understand the circumstances.

Let me break it down for you.

I was raised a JW against my will. I had no holidays, christmas, hallowen never celebrated a birthday. I wasn't allowed to eat anything that might contain by products growing up even, no pizza day at school. That is a slight portion of what growing up was like.

Now try and have a relationship with someone who has had all those things. I don't know how to enjoy or plan for all that simple shit. Its foreign to me. Injecting all that into relationships that are already a pretty tough thing to pull of is very very very difficult.

Does being with someone who understands all that not make more sense?

It's impossible for some people to understand where i'm coming from.
 
TrollfaceDeux

TrollfaceDeux

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i am starting to think grumpus is trolling...and i have no experience in relationships....i may be wrong...
 
Deathwing

Deathwing

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Grumpus_sl said:
Nonsense to someone who doesn't understand the circumstances.

Let me break it down for you.

I was raised a JW against my will. I had no holidays, christmas, hallowen never celebrated a birthday. I wasn't allowed to eat anything that might contain by products growing up even, no pizza day at school. That is a slight portion of what growing up was like.

Now try and have a relationship with someone who has had all those things. I don't know how to enjoy or plan for all that simple shit. Its foreign to me. Injecting all that into relationships that are already a pretty tough thing to pull of is very very very difficult.

Does being with someone who understands all that not make more sense?

It's impossible for some people to understand where i'm coming from.
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And how different are you now that you're free from those chains? People change drastically in their 20s and most of them aren't getting out from under a cult. How can you be sure the person you want to marry now will be remotely the same person in a short time period?

Give it some more time, see how she handles changes. Keep dating her though. No idea why you need to marry her right now.
 
chaos

chaos

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Grumpus_sl said:
Nonsense to someone who doesn't understand the circumstances.

Let me break it down for you.

I was raised a JW against my will. I had no holidays, christmas, hallowen never celebrated a birthday. I wasn't allowed to eat anything that might contain by products growing up even, no pizza day at school. That is a slight portion of what growing up was like.

Now try and have a relationship with someone who has had all those things. I don't know how to enjoy or plan for all that simple shit. Its foreign to me. Injecting all that into relationships that are already a pretty tough thing to pull of is very very very difficult.

Does being with someone who understands all that not make more sense?

It's impossible for some people to understand where i'm coming from.
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Those things do not define you. You're not your fucking khakis.

I really do hope it works out for you, I wish happiness for everyone. Except Tarrant. Fuckin Tarrant. But I do think that maybe you should look at what some people are telling you and just think about it. You have at least 6 months, right? So spend that time, when you're not banging out your hot 19 year old girlfriend, thinking about some things. Like, do you think she is going to be happy 5-10 years from now having married you so young? Or look at yourself. You had a pretty drastic change of views on this matter, from "marriage is the worst thing ever and a terrible idea and you can never trust women" to "I want to marry this girl I just started dating, and I want to do it right now." If I had a fundamental change in POV like that, that might give me pause to think maybe I was getting carried away. Don't get carried away. You're making life decisions here.
 
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