Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Eh not sure yet. We ended up not talking about anything serious last night. We usually save these things for when the kids go to bed and when I was getting the things tucked in, I came out and the missus was asleep on the couch. I personally, do not want to hash it out. It's not like this won't be the millionth time we have talked about this, and at this point I'm at she is either going to change or she isn't. I've let my feelings be known, albeit VERY poorly this time, which is pretty much the thing I want to talk about and that is mainly to apologize for being so childish. I have committed to this marriage and relationship, and as long as it's not something like infidelity, I'm sticking with it. And until I see a smoking gun, I'm not going down that road. She will just have to deal with bad moods from time to time if she doesn't want to do anything to dig deeper into the issue.

Personally I'd love to see counseling of some sort. And it's not motivated by me getting more nookie, but more if there is a deeper underlying issue going on, she needs to get it fixed for her own health. But I believe that is a sticky situation for pretty much everyone else but the person who is suffering, because for them to truly heal they must take the steps willingly or it will all be for naught. I am definitely not at the point of walking out on her over this, so there is no need to push. Things may change down the road, but when I feel they are starting to, I'm definitely going to push hard for counseling then, but we are not at that point yet.

Wait until the kid is born... but then it's a cruel joke as you see them balloon out, but are too sore and tender for your enjoyment, since the kid will be gnawing on them the whole time (If she breast feeds that is).

Romance novels. They don't even have to be the really crappy, trashy kind. Something with some steamy bits though and she'll come running. Probably just as good as alcohol!

Noodleface_sl said:

My wife's pregnancy boobs are in. This is the greatest moment of my life

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From what I've been told by friends it just turns out to be another one of life's bitter ironies, because once they load up with the leche supposedly they become all sensitive and you can't grab 'em. We have plenty of married men here with full time memberships to the parental penal colony, so feel free to correct me if this anecdotal 2nd hand piece of information is incorrect. I want to believe.

No you are 100% correct Frenzied, and it's exasperated if they are breast feeding and those wonderful sensitive spots all of a sudden are raw and literally chewed up.

Lindz, I completely agree with you. Romance novels are a woman's version of porn. However, that is the problem for my wife. She actually went through a phase of that, and she felt guilty due to moral opposition.

In the end we talked last night, and pretty much as I started to cool off on Tuesday, and then definitely yesterday, I realized in this particular instance, I used the past to concoct something in my head that wasn't quite true or real and then I completely exploded. Then to make matters worse, as Death had suspected, there is a lot of stress with idiots she works with. She feels like she is back in high school, and it is wearing on her big time. I profusely apologized and admitted that I was an idiot (I really was, thanks Khane), and hey what do you know... we had sex. I have taken this situation and moving forward, I'm going to do all I can to make home the oasis from the shit storm that is her work. Cause if Momma is happy, so will everyone else.

So the underlying problem here is that women can't work jobs because to them it is always exactly like highschool with Becky not doing this and Steve said this and Jason is fat.

My wife complains so much about her job I just can't understand how she makes it through the day.

If it was just the post office I'd understand, but it was also her 3 previous office jobs as well.

They were "good enough", she's not above hourly jobs

I bet every other person at that office thinks she's the stupid one. In fact, everyone probably thinks the entirety of the office outside of themselves has severe learning disabilities.

I've dated everything from hairdressers to doctors and the post work whine fest phenomena is pretty much universal. If you don't want a chick that whines about her job, date one that is 35+ years old or so, which seems to be the point where they stop being so sensitive about what goes on at work. Any woman I've dated over that age seems to be done with work drama for the most part, and doesn't see work as competition with the other women. In my experience the only difference between the hairdresser and the doctor is that in the latter's case it will be framed within a more formal/serious environment, but in either case it's still you sitting there for an hour listening to drama after your shitty work day. The hairdresser will whine about her shitty clients, the "bitch" that didn't like her hairstyle, and how she got cut for some shift for X reason. The doctor will whine about her dumb nurse, the partners at her practice, or the hospital administration. In either case if they have a female boss, you'll likely hear about what a cunt she is too. I have yet to find a woman that prefers a female boss over a male one.

If I have a shitty day at work, my release is quiet and video games. *Maybe* I'll mention "soandso was a pain today-- total crap day", and that's it. Discussing it more won't make the problem better or make me feel relieved. However for women the opposite holds true, it's just the way it is..

Phaz is right, you just have to develop that technique where you are visibly paying attention, while in actuality 10% of your brain is listening while the other 90% is surfing the Astral Plane. The key is to just pick up on a sentence here and there and re-phrase it as a question. Don't try to offer solutions, because you will only be met with excuses and risk being accused of playing devil's advocate or arguing. Just listen and let it run its course.

Her: "It's no fair. Sally doesn't know anything yet gets to take 1.5 hour lunch breaks, while I've been there 5 years and I can only take an hour"
Me: "sally doesn't know anything?"

Frenzied Wombat_sl said:

Her: "It's no fair. Sally doesn't know anything yet gets to take 1.5 hour lunch breaks, while I've been there 5 years and I can only take an hour"
Me: "sally doesn't know anything?"

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So true with some women. Years back I dated a lawyer who was ultra-selfish and loved to have an hour long phone conversation about herself with me every night we didn't see each other. So I would fire up the PS2, put on a Bluetooth and do EXACTLY what Frenzied just described. Worked like a champ, though I'm surprised I didn't get busted. I think she was too busy talking about herself to notice the occasional slip.

Here you guys are at your jobs whining about your women.

Yea but they're getting paid to bitch and moan. Not like these stupid women. No wonder there's a gender salary gap. Bitches be stupid.