DickTrickle has it right. Here's the timeline.
Meet girl at Renfair (technically SCA event, but I called it a renfair to not have to explain that), spend the evening with her, have a great time. When she leaves she tells me that she's now rethinking what she's been putting up with at home, forgot how awesome life can be, and just really wants to thank me for opening her eyes. I did not have sex with her or anything, in fact, I told her straight up that I had no intrest in being an affair guy, and that if things worked out differently in the future I would love to get to know her, but yeah.
Two days later she tells me that she's thought a lot about it, and that while she hopes there may be something between us in the future, even if that's not going to happen she is going to talk to her husband about divorce. She said she has worked really hard to get her MBA and she wants to travel, go out, just have a full life. Her husband has a minimum wage job across the street from their house, which (All of this is according to her, from her perspective of course) he only leaves the house to walk across the street to work, then he comes back home, sits down at his PS4, and plays video games the rest of the time. Apparently he stopped driving a couple years ago, and over the 6 years they have been together has just become more and more withdrawn and antisocial. She thinks its been more than 6 months since they last had sex, and his inability to do anything really has reached the point where if she needs to leave for something she puts her pets in boarding, because she can't trust him to feed and water them while she's gone. So, she's going to talk to him, and she wanted to thank me again, and tell me she's not doing this for me, although she really hopes we can see if there is something there, because I seemed perfect.
She texts me later that night to tell me that she's in shock, because she went to bring it up, and he was 100% on board. Just said he knows he's been a terrible husband, that she deserves so much more, and on and on. So, she's getting divorced, and he's being very cool about all of it.
We talk and skype for the next week while she is on a trip out of state.
She arrives back at her house last Tuesday (so a week after the talk) and moves into the spare room at her house, has another long talk with him where he is now emotionally all over the place, alternating being really sorry and kind of being a dick.
Wed they talk about who is getting what, selling the house, etc., it's at this point that she is talking to him about money, and maybe helping him get set up somewhere else or something that he confesses he will be leaving the state as soon as the house sells. She's confused, because he has no friends and doesn't really know anyone, she questions him. He confesses that he's gotten very close with a girl he plays games with every day for the last few months. This girl left her husband of 10 years in January and wants him to move in with her. He's going to be with her. She was totally caught off guard by this revelation, but was happy that she didn't need to worry about him. She thought about telling him she had met someone too, but decided there was no reason to (a decision I also heavily advised for, no good comes from telling him). He also admitted that he kind of decided he wanted out a couple of years ago, but didn't know how to do it, so he's just been kind of trying to get her to leave him by being closed off, so he wouldn't have to be the bad guy.
So, she set up a Realtor and printed up all the paperwork for the divorce. She told him Friday she needed some time away and was going to stay with some friends for the weekend. She spent Fri-Sun with me. When she came home last night he was apparently weird and emotional and asked her if she could ever forgive him and told her he wants to spend as much time with her as he can before they leave, that they should go to the movies, baseball games, whatever, because they don't know if they will ever see each other again. She had to tell him no, that she doesn't think that would be healthy for either of them. He then begged her to move back into the room with him at least, just for the next few weeks, nothings going to happen, he just wants to be close to her. She again had to tell him no, and have a big tear filled talk. She said its weird because at first she thought they were totally on the same page, but now she's realizing he isn't as far over the relationship as she is, and its just awkward and sad. She is hoping its like grieving and he's in stage 4, bargaining, and will move into stage 5 acceptance any time. Either way, she's 100% done, and the brief time she's had with me has given her enough of a taste of what life can be like that there is no going back.
That's the situation in more detail.
Also, about the other stuff - I sold my Jurassic Park truck at the end of last year, so I'm driving my 2013 Ford Focus Hatchback now exclusively
, and she didn't even realize my hair was actually my permanent hair upon meeting me, and wanted an explanation when she realized. Since then, she's let me know that she would definitely prefer I cut it, but that its up to me and she obviously likes me all the same. She made a comment this weekend about how she'd be very appreciative if I could wear a hat when/if I meet her parents. So, I don't think the "rebelling against mommy and daddy" theory holds up too well either.
She's 29, an educated adult with a seemingly good head on her shoulders. She does seem to jump into things as fast as I do, which is worrisome, but... maybe that works? Like I said... I'm basically already 100% in on this. So, we'll see where it goes. I'm hoping it doesn't go anywhere that ends up as more stories here, but if it does, it does.
