Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Cad · Apr 7, 2015

Tenks_sl said:
I know what you're getting at but until you can bring me actual evidence that somehow Asian women are less high maintaninence than American women you don't really have an argument outside of your limited anecdotal evidence.

You got actual evidence women don't make brisket every night?

Soygen · Apr 7, 2015

Cad_sl said:
You got actual evidence women don't make brisket every night?

I'll take a picture of my dinner table when I get home.

Khane · Apr 7, 2015

Tenks_sl said:
I know what you're getting at but until you can bring me actual evidence that somehow Asian women are less high maintaninence than American women you don't really have an argument outside of your limited anecdotal evidence.

So many idealistic married men in this thread. Keep sticking your head in the sand just because you think you have to pretend there aren't trends in our country now that you're married lest ye offend the delicate sensibilities of your esteemed wife.

Tenks · Apr 7, 2015

Khane_sl said:
So many idealistic married men in this thread. Keep sticking your head in the sand just because you think you have to pretend there aren't trends in our country now that you're married lest ye offend the delicate sensibilities of your esteemed wife.

Ok I know what Cad was getting at but this makes no sense to me

Khane · Apr 7, 2015

Tenks_sl said:
Ok I know what Cad was getting at but this makes no sense to me

It means that you're ignoring what the reality of the state of dating is just because you've gotten yourself out of the dating pool. And now you're acting holier than thou with the stupid "oh generalizations herp derp" nonsense.

Tenks · Apr 7, 2015

As for @Cad I'm simply talking about this

Traditional Families Account for Only 7 Percent of U.S. Households

Soygen · Apr 7, 2015

I'm 39 and most people I know would line up with what Tenks is saying. I think it just has to do with your social circles. I can't say what the majority of the country is doing, but two earners and shared responsibilities tend to be the norm in my group of friends and close relatives.

Khane · Apr 7, 2015

Soygen_sl said:
I'm 39 and most people I know would line up with what Tenks is saying. I think it just has to do with your social circles. I can't say what the majority of the country is doing, but two earners and shared responsibilities tend to be the norm in my group of friends and close relatives.

God I wish that were true. Women around here definitely still expect a man to be more successful and provide for them while they "follow their dream" of being a deadbeat.

Let me extrapolate on that.

Men are more ambitious than women, they are more likely to work multiple jobs or change jobs to make a better life for themselves. I really don't give a shit if a woman works if she is a "teacher assistant" at a daycare making 24k a year. That isn't a career, yet that stupid article Tenks linked treats it as if it is. And women believe it is too.

DickTrickle · Apr 7, 2015

Cad_sl said:
Oh, so you're arguing a broad trend that is usually true but not always, so your statement is still valid? Interesting

I get where you're going with this except you said "I would stay single if I only had white chicks to choose from." So, sure, you amended to talk about broad trends, but the reality is you're painting all white women with the same brush. I don't get it. Let's say 20% of Asians are princesses and 80% of whites are princesses. Why, instead of completely ignoring the 20% of white non-princesses and also maybe landing one of the 20% Asian princesses, simply avoid princesses? The idea of breaking it down along race instead of behavior type doesn't make sense. The only way it makes sense to break it down by race is if all white women are princesses and all Asians are not princesses. Or are princesses really that hard to spot that you think you're better off doing it by race?

Or was that just hyperbole?

Fifey · Apr 7, 2015

Every couple I know outside of one is a dual income/responsibility like Soygen/Tenks was saying. It really does come down to your social circles, my girlfriend made exactly the same amount of money I did last year and still cooks dinner most nights/splits the bill. It's almost like these broad stereotypes aren't true.

Cad · Apr 7, 2015

DickTrickle_sl said:
I get where you're going with this except you said "I would stay single if I only had white chicks to choose from." So, sure, you amended to talk about broad trends, but the reality is you're painting all white women with the same brush. I don't get it. Let's say 20% of Asians are princesses and 80% of whites are princesses. Why, instead of completely ignoring the 20% of white non-princesses and also maybe landing one of the 20% Asian princesses, simply avoid princesses? The idea of breaking it down along race instead of behavior type doesn't make sense. The only way it makes sense to break it down by race is if all white women are princesses and all Asians are not princesses. Or are princesses really that hard to spot that you think you're better off doing it by race?

Or was that just hyperbole?

Probably hyperbole, but I've been with only asians so long I don't even like how white chicks look for the most part anymore. (There are gorgeous white women obviously, but in general I prefer how asians look.) White chicks also age like shit.

I guess I'd say it's less about race than it is about culture - I really like the small subset of culture you get from asians that have lived in the US less than a generation. If you could put white chicks in the same situation they'd probably turn out similarly, it's not really racial.

As far as avoiding princesses, sure. I'm sure there are non-princess white girls. But there are other cultural factors too; white girls don't tend to upkeep their appearance (weight) the way asians do. You should hear the asian girls mercilessly hammering each other on their weight when they all weigh under 105lbs. My wife will have a fit if she gains 2lbs. She weighs the same now as she did when she was 19. And I know, because I was fucking her then too.

I know the fat apologists will be all "I don't want a chick who is neurotic about her weight! What about having fun and enjoying life!" ... ok, enjoy waking up next to a fatty then.

Khane · Apr 7, 2015

fifey_sl said:
Every couple I know outside of one is a dual income/responsibility like Soygen/Tenks was saying. It really does come down to your social circles, my girlfriend made exactly the same amount of money I did last year and still cooks dinner most nights/splits the bill. It's almost like these broad stereotypes aren't true.

You and I are vastly different. What's dual/income responsibility look like? Because I almost never meet women who are on my level. They act and pretend they are at first, but it becomes evidently clear within a short time frame that they don't even hold a candle.

I guess if you're a dude who only makes 40k/year it's easy to find an equal woman. And while that probably sounds arrogant as hell (and it is) it's a real struggle for someone like me who makes almost 4x that much.

DickTrickle · Apr 7, 2015

Cad_sl said:
Probably hyperbole, but I've been with only asians so long I don't even like how white chicks look for the most part anymore. (There are gorgeous white women obviously, but in general I prefer how asians look.) White chicks also age like shit.

I guess I'd say it's less about race than it is about culture - I really like the small subset of culture you get from asians that have lived in the US less than a generation. If you could put white chicks in the same situation they'd probably turn out similarly, it's not really racial.

As far as avoiding princesses, sure. I'm sure there are non-princess white girls. But there are other cultural factors too; white girls don't tend to upkeep their appearance (weight) the way asians do. You should hear the asian girls mercilessly hammering each other on their weight when they all weigh under 105lbs. My wife will have a fit if she gains 2lbs. She weighs the same now as she did when she was 19. And I know, because I was fucking her then too.

I know the fat apologists will be all "I don't want a chick who is neurotic about her weight! What about having fun and enjoying life!" ... ok, enjoy waking up next to a fatty then.

I can't help but note that because you've been with a certain type of person for a long time and like them, you come to find them more attractive than other types of people. It's almost as if someone who regularly dated women without makeup could come to prefer women without makeup...

That aside, your expanded explanation, while not one I can really relate to, makes more sense. I think group trends are probably more worth considering when you think about future states (though race still seems like too large group), since you're taking more of a gamble. I don't think people really become princesses in mid-life, but there's definitely a lot of people that gain weight mid-life.

Of course, at the end of the day, it's hard to ignore one's own personal anecdotes especially when it comes to relationships, whether they hold true to reality or not, so I can only judge people so much for it.

Soygen · Apr 7, 2015

Khane_sl said:
I guess if you're a dude who only makes 40k/year it's easy to find an equal woman. And while that probably sounds arrogant as hell (and it is) it's a real struggle for someone like me who makes almost 4x that much.

At 160k a year, you're in the top 5% of income earners in the country. If your expectation is someone making even close to that, your options are severely limited. I'm not saying you should lower your standards, but if you aren't happy with your results...

Fifey · Apr 7, 2015

It's not arrogant, I mentioned earlier it's a he'll of a lot harder for you upper income people to find women who aren't just spoiled. Finding an attractive girl in the top income bracket just leaves you to nurses/doctors and we all know how those stories end.

Cad · Apr 7, 2015

DickTrickle_sl said:
It's almost as if someone who regularly dated women without makeup could come to prefer women without makeup...

Had you said it that way, I don't think anyone would have said a word. You didn't.

Khane · Apr 7, 2015

Soygen_sl said:
At 160k a year, you're in the top 5% of income earners in the country. If your expectation is someone making even close to that, you're options are severely limited.

That's the dilemma, that isn't lost on me. I realize that is true. But I still WANT to be with someone who is my equal, and I do meet women who are. Unfortunately for me they almost always expect to meet a man who is their vast superior, and I don't make the cut.

Cad · Apr 7, 2015

Khane_sl said:
That's the dilemma, that isn't lost on me. I realize that is true. But I still WANT to be with someone who is my equal, and I do meet women who are. Unfortunately for me they almost always expect to meet a man who is their vast superior, and I don't make the cut.

I wouldn't put a premium on a chick being your equal in earning power; instead I'd put a premium on meeting someone who is your equal in intellect. It is vastly preferable for one partner to take a lower-stress lower-hour job rather than both being in higher-stress high earning jobs. I'm not being sexist here either, one of my good friends was a flight attendant who married a doctor and now he doesn't work. He's Mr. Mom for sure. I'm actually kinda jealous of that gig unless he got hit with a serious pre-nup.

Khane · Apr 7, 2015

Cad_sl said:
I wouldn't put a premium on a chick being your equal in earning power; instead I'd put a premium on meeting someone who is your equal in intellect. It is vastly preferable for one partner to take a lower-stress lower-hour job rather than both being in higher-stress high earning jobs. I'm not being sexist here either, one of my good friends was a flight attendant who married a doctor and now he doesn't work. He's Mr. Mom for sure. I'm actually kinda jealous of that gig unless he got hit with a serious pre-nup.

I do exactly as you say. But I think anyone who still dates at my age will find a correlation between earning power and intellect. The women who are intellectually stimulating to me are always in the same ballpark, the women who aren't intellectually stimulating are teachers and social workers who honestly feel like they are doing god's work, and therefore are on my level, but can't hold an intelligent conversation outside of pop culture.

Your friend must be insanely good looking to have landed what he did. Though I wouldn't want to be Mr. Mom either. I value contributing to society far too much to ever give up my career.

Izo · Apr 7, 2015

fifey_sl said:
It's not arrogant, I mentioned earlier it's a he'll of a lot harder for you upper income people to find women who aren't just spoiled. Finding an attractive girl in the top income bracket just leaves you to nurses/doctors and we all know how those stories end.

Nurses are top 5% in the states? Woah.

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