Marriage and the Power of Divorce

I thought it was the final solution?

Tenks_sl said:

I don't necessarily disagree with her, TBH. If there is someone I don't want to talk to I have a very, very hard time not being rude to them. So I just ignore their presence for the most part. The fact that you and your new GF can't understand that your ex-wife probably doesn't want to acknowledge your new GF's existence is very odd. It almost seems normal from her to take the route she took. She isn't even actively being rude. She is just ignoring her. And she's right. You are 0 for 3 on relationships and now you've moved in some girl she barely knows (fuck that YOU barely know) into your house where your children spend a large portion of their time. I wouldn't even want my dog to stay overnight at someone's house where I don't know everyone living there.

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She was definitely actively being rude. Dude, i can't believe that you as a grown man act that way towards people. Sometimes you have to interact with people you don't really care for, but people you DO care for do. A simple "hi" isn't going to kill you. The way she acted isn't normal behavior, that is some petty high school bullshit. And Onoes' love life is not any of her business, even if it was, I doubt she is in any position to be casting stones.

You still share a credit card with your ex wife Onoes? wtf is wrong with you.

Gavinmad_sl said:

You still share a credit card with your ex wife Onoes? wtf is wrong with you.

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Pretty sure that list is too long for the boards to handle.

Yeah, you have to get that financial shit squared away bro, you have to take care of #1, not even because she will consciously fuck you on it either. Just through negligence she could bring damage to you, or at least annoyance.

chaos_sl said:

She was definitely actively being rude. Dude, i can't believe that you as a grown man act that way towards people. Sometimes you have to interact with people you don't really care for, but people you DO care for do. A simple "hi" isn't going to kill you. The way she acted isn't normal behavior, that is some petty high school bullshit. And Onoes' love life is not any of her business, even if it was, I doubt she is in any position to be casting stones.

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Onoes' love life is her business when his GF moves into a house where her kids stay.

No, it isn't, that is some weird ass logic. By that logic literally anything he does or says in his house is her business.

The moment this woman does anything offensive or harmful to the children, then it is her business. Until then no it isn't.

So the settlement says the house is yours but you never took her name off the deed? I recall getting her name removed with the paperwork in hand and not having to refinance, but I was refinancing anyway so I could be wrong. Still, that seems like a bad idea to me and just asking for potential headaches down the road.

Did you buy her out of the house or what?

Phazael_sl said:

She shacked up with some new dude first and Onoes (supposedly) did not make a peep about that.

GET
A
FUCKING
LAWYER
YESTERDAY
!

Seriously. The ex is nuts and not thinking rationally and you have all but put your nuts in a vice and handed her the twist handle. Its ok that you are a nutty dumb impulsive bastard, but PLEASE protect yourself.

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Ah I missed the part where she already lives(ed) with someone

chaos_sl said:

No, it isn't, that is some weird ass logic. By that logic literally anything he does or says in his house is her business.

The moment this woman does anything offensive or harmful to the children, then it is her business. Until then no it isn't.

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No your logic is flawed. Obviously there are some concessions made because he is the father of her children and she's given some trust that what goes on in that house is acceptable behavior. If you turn that house into a revolving door of women, a mother has a reasonable expectation of concern.

Jesus H Christ. Wake the fuck up man.

1) Get her name off your house.
2) Get your name off her Credit Card.
3) Don't involve your new GF for custody swaps in any capacity. Your ex does not have to be cordial in any way to your new GF, trying to force it is going to create bigger problems. Be George, don't let worlds collide.

chaos_sl said:

No, it isn't, that is some weird ass logic. By that logic literally anything he does or says in his house is her business.

The moment this woman does anything offensive or harmful to the children, then it is her business. Until then no it isn't.

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Well, its not even unheard of for lawyers to write in stuff about not moving people in with the kids or even crazy shit like not allowing the kids to call another partner "mom/dad" names. Not that Ohnoes has any special stipulations like that, but courts tend to think of the children's welfare number one. I doubt any court will agree with you that its none of her business who lives there. Of course she's being immature and causing drama, and she can't do anything without evidence that new girl is a problem, but Tenks has a point, it shouldn't really be surprising.

Women (and plenty of men) have a hard enough time getting past the new partner thing when they have time to process it slowly. He just moved her in essentially from out of nowhere. You're absolutely right that her behavior is inappropriate, but it doesn't shock me in the least that it happened.

I find it pretty interesting that she threw the "0-3 in relationships" card in his face, when that's something we've kind of lobbed at him about this girl as well without even knowing him in person.

Jesus christ.... "You know what, if she doesn't like it, how about she can just stay in the car when you come to my house" - This is the way a rational man would already have handled the situation. Did you two seriously go bee bopping up to the front door of your ex's house? And you are mad that she didnt acknowledge your new girlfriend? What the fuck did you think she was going to do? Ask her to come to a slumber party?

And fuck man, get a damn lawyer to clean up your paperwork! You are going to get fucked soooo hard. SOOOOO HARD.

bee bopping to the door lol

ZyyzYzzy_sl said:

Without the horns you no longer are able to control your ex. They were your source of power.

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I actually tried to warn him, like some Samson and Delilah shit. Its right here in the thread. He didn't listen.

Gavinmad_sl said:

You still share a credit card with your ex wife Onoes? wtf is wrong with you.

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Yeah, that fight was pretty mild compared to the financial clusterfuck Onoes has going. And refinancing shouldn't cost you much out of pocket, Onoes, if you have decent credit.

Onoes_sl said:

Ok, here was the argument.

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It's like you know you are being foolish, but can't help yourself.

Your ex and the new woman should not meet, or if they do, it should be discussed beforehand and have mutual approval. You seriously thought it was a good idea to start bringing the woman who moved in 2 months of long distance relationship after meeting you at SwordFags CampFuckery to custody handoffs and expected your ex to be friendly to her? That was a terrible idea. It remains a terrible idea going forward. Stop poking the dragon for no reason. You're lucky that argument didn't go much worse, as in "I need to look at my custody options due to the kids' home situation".

Also, there should be absolutely no financial stuff shared. If you can't get her removed from the house, there should be a specific legal document (maybe a Limited Power of Attorney?) signing it over to you. If you don't have that, get it. Having the house as a line item in a wider agreement, especially if that agreement was written by you two and not a lawyer, could put it at risk if the agreement is deemed invalid in court. It could also cause you problems when trying to sell the house, like she could decide at the time of sale that half of the proceeds really DO belong to her, because she deserves it and she needs that money to get her own place and why should YOU get all the money when her name is on it? Even if she isn't that cunty, she could still be flaky as fuck about signing off on things while you are trying to get the sale done since she gives no shits about it, and you need her sig since you were lazy with legal paperwork. And your sale could fall through. Bad times.

And if she won't take her name off the CC, take YOUR name off or close it.

Tie up your loose ends and stop making unnecessary trouble for yourself, bro.