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I was meaning that I didn't believe her, man. I know better than that, especially after reading this thread for the last couple of years.
Marriage and the Power of Divorce
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
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His stories are like us gathering around an elder to hear really awesome events that we can learn from! Lol.
Onoes
Trakanon Raider
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Ok, let me clarify a few things.
A.) Yeah, I go bee-booping up to her house with my girlfriend. She's my girlfriend who will typically be with me. I think it would be much weirder to be like "Sorry, I need to hide you in front of my ex..."
B.) My Ex has never lived with a guy, she was by herself, then lived with her female cousin for a bit, and is now by herself again.
C.) When she threw the 0-3 girls in my face, my defense was "Yes, I've dated 3 girls, 2 of which I thought there might be a chance with. Neither of them lived with me, and the kids only saw 2 of them on one occasion (their daughters birthday parties in both cases actually), and the third they saw a lot, because things were going well. It didn't work out, I thought it was, but it was a clean break. " she responded that she had never introduced the kids to a guy she's dated, and didn't want them getting used to a revolving door or woman in and out of their lives. I responded that I don't think that's been an issue, and I don't think it will be an issue, I really feel like I've got a lasting shot with this girl. She said that she just doesn't want my selfish mistakes to hurt the kids. I ignored it and we kept talking. Towards the end of the conversation she said it again, and I said "Look, we've been divorced a year and a half, yes, I've made mistakes and bad judgement calls, but I don't think I've hurt the kids. They are in a loving and supportive family, I think they are fine. You've also made some bad judgement calls and mistakes over the last year, but I'm not throwing that in your face. We've both made mistakes, we both do our best, the kids are fine." To which she replied that her mistakes have never had a chance of hurting the kids. To which I replied "You're telling me if one of the wives of the husbands you were sleeping with who found out, as several of them did, ran into you at the store with the kids, or showed up at your house you don't think that would have a chance of hurting them? I would argue that you put them in a lot more possible danger than me breaking up with a girl did. All I'm saying is we both made mistakes, it's going to happen." And she was like "Well.. yeah..."
D.) In the divorce paperwork it said that she would get possession of the car, and I would assume any and all debt, but also get possession of the house. I then looked into refinancing- I would need an inspection and appraisal for my house. I converted my garage to a game room, which could potentially cause all kinds of problems, the reality lady I went to when I was first looking at getting it refinanced said that if everything goes well, I'm probably looking at about $3,500 to refinance, but if the appraiser doesn't sign off and I have to file for a city inspector to get permits and pay fines I'm probably looking at $8,000+. On top of that, with my current mortgage I do not pay any mortgage insurance, because its a type of government loan. With the refinance I would need to use a regular loan, pay mortgage insurance, and it would add around $100 to my monthly payment. So yeah, none of that sounded great, and so I just haven't done it.
E.) My credit score is 816, so no problem there. See, told you I'm responsible!
F.) The credit card was a joint Chase account. We both have to go into a bank together to cancel it, and to her its not worth her time. It's super annoying. It hasn't been used in over a year however.
G.) Yeah, I feel like she could be a decent civil person to my girlfriend. We're adults who get along and don't have romantic feelings for each other, so why not?
Did I cover everything?
A.) Yeah, I go bee-booping up to her house with my girlfriend. She's my girlfriend who will typically be with me. I think it would be much weirder to be like "Sorry, I need to hide you in front of my ex..."
B.) My Ex has never lived with a guy, she was by herself, then lived with her female cousin for a bit, and is now by herself again.
C.) When she threw the 0-3 girls in my face, my defense was "Yes, I've dated 3 girls, 2 of which I thought there might be a chance with. Neither of them lived with me, and the kids only saw 2 of them on one occasion (their daughters birthday parties in both cases actually), and the third they saw a lot, because things were going well. It didn't work out, I thought it was, but it was a clean break. " she responded that she had never introduced the kids to a guy she's dated, and didn't want them getting used to a revolving door or woman in and out of their lives. I responded that I don't think that's been an issue, and I don't think it will be an issue, I really feel like I've got a lasting shot with this girl. She said that she just doesn't want my selfish mistakes to hurt the kids. I ignored it and we kept talking. Towards the end of the conversation she said it again, and I said "Look, we've been divorced a year and a half, yes, I've made mistakes and bad judgement calls, but I don't think I've hurt the kids. They are in a loving and supportive family, I think they are fine. You've also made some bad judgement calls and mistakes over the last year, but I'm not throwing that in your face. We've both made mistakes, we both do our best, the kids are fine." To which she replied that her mistakes have never had a chance of hurting the kids. To which I replied "You're telling me if one of the wives of the husbands you were sleeping with who found out, as several of them did, ran into you at the store with the kids, or showed up at your house you don't think that would have a chance of hurting them? I would argue that you put them in a lot more possible danger than me breaking up with a girl did. All I'm saying is we both made mistakes, it's going to happen." And she was like "Well.. yeah..."
D.) In the divorce paperwork it said that she would get possession of the car, and I would assume any and all debt, but also get possession of the house. I then looked into refinancing- I would need an inspection and appraisal for my house. I converted my garage to a game room, which could potentially cause all kinds of problems, the reality lady I went to when I was first looking at getting it refinanced said that if everything goes well, I'm probably looking at about $3,500 to refinance, but if the appraiser doesn't sign off and I have to file for a city inspector to get permits and pay fines I'm probably looking at $8,000+. On top of that, with my current mortgage I do not pay any mortgage insurance, because its a type of government loan. With the refinance I would need to use a regular loan, pay mortgage insurance, and it would add around $100 to my monthly payment. So yeah, none of that sounded great, and so I just haven't done it.
E.) My credit score is 816, so no problem there. See, told you I'm responsible!
F.) The credit card was a joint Chase account. We both have to go into a bank together to cancel it, and to her its not worth her time. It's super annoying. It hasn't been used in over a year however.
G.) Yeah, I feel like she could be a decent civil person to my girlfriend. We're adults who get along and don't have romantic feelings for each other, so why not?
Did I cover everything?
Khane
Got something right about marriage
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She's completely right on C my man. Kids get attached to people easily and if they end up getting attached to one of these crazies and then the two of you breakup, and you keep repeating that cycle, it will create a lot of confusion for them in their formative years. They'll come to expect people entering and then leaving their lives and that relationships are nothing more than short, wild flings.
That's because you have a terrible understanding of acceptable social cues, horns.
Nester
Vyemm Raider
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This is not a reasonable nor is it fair. 1 in 500 women (or men) could handle this situation in a positive manner. Your Ex just told you she is not one of them. Heed her warning.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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I would probably keep my new girlfriends from my ex wife until it was fairly serious. You moved in together though so the situation is forcibly stranger
Phazael
Confirmed Beta Shitlord, Fat Bastard
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(A) She divorced you, as I recall, so for her to expect any measure of control over when you hang out with another romantic interest is ridiculous. Unless the new girl does something to threaten her position as mother of your children, Ex needs to grow the fuck up. It won't happen and she is going to fucking you over out of bitter spite.
(B) I thought you said she was shaking up with some guy, but if not then point A remains anyhow.
(C) Someone who sent your buds tit picks and started blowing cops in their cars has no leg to stand on, but immature women (like say, someone who has either had daddy or you taking care of them their whole life) are not going to behave rationally. Expect more double standard fuckery on this front and this is likely how she is going to rationalize buttfucking you in court when she eventually gets around to that.
(D) All she has to say is that she felt pressured by you and you may as well wipe your ass with all that paperwork. You will lose half the value of your house and all the back support you have been not recording legally.
(E) If you don't fix that fucking card situation, that won't remain that way long. Her flaking is a giant red flag that should tell you that the next time she decides she "deserves more" she is going to max that puppy out on a vegas trip or something equally asinine.
(F) See above.
(G) You are right, but realistically she has already shown that she is strong in the cunt side of the force. It is going to make your eventual cornholing at her hands all the more painful if you don't wake up to this reality and get yourself protected. Everyone here knew what the argument was about before you posted the details. Does that not give you pause? Just because you are a nice guy does not mean she is nice. She was (for a while) when you took over for her dad supporting her princess status, but now she has had a few rides on the cock carrousel with predictable results. If you could trust her, you would still be married. Remember that and use caution at every turn. My prediction based on what you have shared is that she is going to go super mega cunt the moment either of you gets engaged. For once in your life, don't get caught unprepared.
(B) I thought you said she was shaking up with some guy, but if not then point A remains anyhow.
(C) Someone who sent your buds tit picks and started blowing cops in their cars has no leg to stand on, but immature women (like say, someone who has either had daddy or you taking care of them their whole life) are not going to behave rationally. Expect more double standard fuckery on this front and this is likely how she is going to rationalize buttfucking you in court when she eventually gets around to that.
(D) All she has to say is that she felt pressured by you and you may as well wipe your ass with all that paperwork. You will lose half the value of your house and all the back support you have been not recording legally.
(E) If you don't fix that fucking card situation, that won't remain that way long. Her flaking is a giant red flag that should tell you that the next time she decides she "deserves more" she is going to max that puppy out on a vegas trip or something equally asinine.
(F) See above.
(G) You are right, but realistically she has already shown that she is strong in the cunt side of the force. It is going to make your eventual cornholing at her hands all the more painful if you don't wake up to this reality and get yourself protected. Everyone here knew what the argument was about before you posted the details. Does that not give you pause? Just because you are a nice guy does not mean she is nice. She was (for a while) when you took over for her dad supporting her princess status, but now she has had a few rides on the cock carrousel with predictable results. If you could trust her, you would still be married. Remember that and use caution at every turn. My prediction based on what you have shared is that she is going to go super mega cunt the moment either of you gets engaged. For once in your life, don't get caught unprepared.
A. Dont do that. She wont be cool with it. You should know this, but since you dont, dont do that. Now you do know this.
B. Whatevs
C. You sound like soulmates
D. Was this agreement written on the back of a Misfits T-Shirt? Also, you converted your garage to worthless living space (game room?) without any permits? Jesus.
E. Not when she is done with you.
F. Fairly certain you could each go in separately. My wife sets up all sorts of financial shit for me, and I just swing by when I have time and sign.
G. She wont be. Just like you probably dont high five the cop she was blowing every time you see him.
H. Grow the horns back, for the same reason poisonous things in nature are generally brightly colored.
B. Whatevs
C. You sound like soulmates
D. Was this agreement written on the back of a Misfits T-Shirt? Also, you converted your garage to worthless living space (game room?) without any permits? Jesus.
E. Not when she is done with you.
F. Fairly certain you could each go in separately. My wife sets up all sorts of financial shit for me, and I just swing by when I have time and sign.
G. She wont be. Just like you probably dont high five the cop she was blowing every time you see him.
H. Grow the horns back, for the same reason poisonous things in nature are generally brightly colored.
chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
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Ii don't spend a lot of time studying family court decisions, but I can't imagine a court who would decide that his ex wife has any say at all about Onoes shacking up with some lady. We're not talking about a heroin junkie or something, just someone that his ex doesn't particularly like or want to get along with. Of course the children come first, but that isn't what this is about at all. People talking about a "revolving door of women" sounds like haters. He is in a committed relationship with one woman, a professional and well off woman who by all indications is not a crack head or anything, and takes good care of the kids. This woman living with Onoes is none of his ex's business.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
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Have you not been paying attention to his stories? This guy falls in love with someone new every 3 months. If that isn't a revolving door I don't know what is...
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chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
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Yeah I have been. He was on the one woman, as I remember, and that didn't work out, and now this one. So two...
ZyyzYzzy
RIP USA
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Don't forget him going down on a ham beast that had spent all day sweating and walking around a ren fest, at the same time as meeting this new woman, who left her husband and moved in with him in like a day. Give or take.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
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He had crazy tattooed broad who he shared pictures of here, I think some other chica between her and the one who "broke his heart" when she went from spending every waking moment together to "sorry we moved too fast", and now is living with this one 2 months after meeting her. Along with a few others that he didn't fall in love with in between like crazy photo shoot girl.
I'm pretty sure I'm missing one other love story because he said there were 3 others and his kids met two of them. It's only been a year and a half since the divorce. Even if it's only 2 others besides this one 3 times is a lot of times to fall in love in 18 months. That ain't normal chaos.
I'm pretty sure I'm missing one other love story because he said there were 3 others and his kids met two of them. It's only been a year and a half since the divorce. Even if it's only 2 others besides this one 3 times is a lot of times to fall in love in 18 months. That ain't normal chaos.
It also isn't abnormal. It just isn't a recipe for stability. I fall in and out of love or whatever pretty easily. However I'm a comfort addict so I typically maintain a relationship for long periods of time even when im not in love anymore. This tends to lead to bad things when your partner figures it out though. So I wouldn't advise others to live this way.
chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
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He was banging a few girls but from what I remember there was this girl and the one other thay could even reasonably be called serious. Maybe I am forgetting one, idk. I don't think two or three in 18 months is abnormal. Especially given this guy's personality.