Its just that you jump directly into "well you guys aren't right for each other, pull the plug" based on almost nothing. Its not that drastic, the guy's not out shopping for moissanite rings or anything, he has time to figure her out for now.
Well, it seems to me he's asking if he should stay or if he should go. I'm giving my opinion. And I'm not saying "pull the plug". I'm saying, objectively, it sounds like the two of your are just different when it comes to how much time you want to spend together. That's a fundamental difference in personality. No amount of time or compromise is going to change that. It will always circle back around and lead to an argument, or at the very least a difference of opinion.
I'll say it again, if you want to have this level anxiety every time you need to have a serious conversation with this woman for fear of her "flipping her shit" that is your prerogative. Plenty of guys have made that compromise in favor of the other positive traits the woman might have. If it were me, I would just have the conversation straight up and if she did flip her shit I'd take that as my sign to move on because I wouldn't want to go through my life like that. That isn't for me.
You largely covered why opiate's advice is not good with a very candid self assessment here. My impression is that he either has not had or is not into long term commitment, either. Apples and Oranges.
Fair enough. Though I may have done a poor job describing my anxiety level, which isn't THAT high. Nor has she flipped out when I discussed things with her prior. I just wanted to draw on collective experience here for some tips on broaching what could be a sensitive topic. So it sounds less like "fuck off" and more like "you're important, but I also need more time to myself".
Been with the same woman for 10 years, married for 6 this August. Short of nasty name-calling I can have any conversation with her I want without fear of her going lobster rage fist because I used the wrong word.
Well that is basically what I said to tell her. I mean you don't have to use my EXACT phrasing.
No shit. Noodle defies logic on a lot of levels though and gets away with it. There are just some things you just do not say at all when talking to a woman you are in a relationship unless you want to nuke it right there. "Clingy", "Cunt", "You are just like your mother.", and "Your sister is attractive" are all pretty high on that list of nuclear launch codes.
I think we are all just too numbed by dealing with Onoes, where nothing is subtle and it requires a sledge hammer to get points across. We are not used to dude looking for advice about minor concern in this thread anymore.
Calling them "crazy" usually amps the crazy to 11. The conclusion of "Haast's Ex-Wife: A Case Study".
I'm combating such inanities, one post at a time. I will be rewarded, I will be delivered to valhalla shiny and chrome.
Just shy of 4 years, Nobody dumped anyone. It was a mutual agreement that we should go our separate ways. Not sure why either of those things matters.
