Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Frenzied Wombat

Frenzied Wombat

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I can't emphasize enough how important it is that you put on the thickest rubber money can buy when banging this chick, and not for STD reasons. Women don't end up with multiple baby daddies because they were too dumb to learn the first time around, but because doubling down is her best option if baby daddy #1 isn't forking over the coin, in jail, or otherwise insufficient in some capacity. Even if baby daddy #1 is paying up, mommy might really hate being a semi broke single mom, and baby daddy #2 is the best potential solution to that.

Enjoy the pussy but double bag the boner please. Also, I would do your best to distance yourself from her mom and her kid unless you seriously see this going somewhere, and as others have mentioned, settling for the first pussy that walks by after years of horrible marriage is not recommended.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Frenzied Wombat_sl said:
Enjoy the pussy but double bag the boner please.
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The man said please for Christ's sake.

Just kidding you anyways. Have fun having your boner serviced, just be careful. We're all rerolled bros looking out for eachother.

Take me for example, I didn't listen to anyone here when I Got married. If things go wrong it's all on me
 
Frenzied Wombat

Frenzied Wombat

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On the topic of Valentine's day, when the fuck did roses start costing their weight in gold? I know the prices go up for the outright scam that is V-day, but $200 for a bouquet of 24 roses, are you fucking kidding me? That's seriously what the local online florists are charging..
 
mkopec

mkopec

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The wife likes houseplants so that's usually what I get. Its cheap and it lasts for ever if you take care of it. Not that price is an issue.
 
BrutulTM

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
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Frenzied Wombat

Frenzied Wombat

Potato del Grande
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Big Phoenix_sl said:
Just stop by any supermarket and buy flowers from them.
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Nice logical thinking-- save oodles of money on an identical product. Unfortunately the pain of having to hear about how all her girlfriends had flowers delivered to their offices while she got the Central Market bouquet wouldn't be worth the savings. I think the flowers themselves are just half of it, based upon my intra-office observations it's just as much a competition between the girls as to who will receive the most obnoxiously large bouquet delivery. One chick just received a gigantic teddy bear and 60 roses and some of the other girls are already gossiping over how "tacky" the bear is.
 
Falstaff

Falstaff

Ahn'Qiraj Raider
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Frenzied Wombat_sl said:
Nice logical thinking-- save oodles of money on an identical product. Unfortunately the pain of having to hear about how all her girlfriends had flowers delivered to their offices while she got the Central Market bouquet wouldn't be worth the savings. I think the flowers themselves are just half of it, based upon my intra-office observations it's just as much a competition between the girls as to who will receive the most obnoxiously large bouquet delivery. One chick just received a gigantic teddy bear and 60 roses and some of the other girls are already gossiping over how "tacky" the bear is.
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if this is true, I feel bad for you
 
Deathwing

Deathwing

<Bronze Donator>
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I bought my wife a card with dogs on it. I wrote on it that if she wanted a "legit" valentines card, she could have that too. The legit one was addressed to a grandmother, she's not a grandma. This is my way of saying fuck this holiday, and she get's two funny cards with more though put into them than just burning money on some vegetation.


I also bought her some cookie dough oreos.
 
chaos

chaos

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I would never buy my wife some stupid gaudy shit and have it delivered to her work. Who the hell does that?
 
mkopec

mkopec

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Frenzied Wombat_sl said:
Nice logical thinking-- save oodles of money on an identical product. Unfortunately the pain of having to hear about how all her girlfriends had flowers delivered to their offices while she got the Central Market bouquet wouldn't be worth the savings. I think the flowers themselves are just half of it, based upon my intra-office observations it's just as much a competition between the girls as to who will receive the most obnoxiously large bouquet delivery. One chick just received a gigantic teddy bear and 60 roses and some of the other girls are already gossiping over how "tacky" the bear is.
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Ive been married for 12 yrs now bro. Were way past the point of delivering flowers at work thing. In fact my wife would be pissed that I essentially threw money out the window.

Now if you are courting some girl and trying to cop a piece, then by all means, deliver away.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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I got my wife a nice card, a funny card from the dog (I'm gay), some candy/cookies. She's been really into the weekly game night we've been hosting because it brings both of our families together, so I ordered the Firefly board game from Amazon. I figured we could play it together or with my brother, the other Firefly nerd.

I don't know what she got me, but it came in a 4 foot long box and weighs next to nothing. I'm legitimately thinking there's nothing in it.
 
BrutulTM

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
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chaos_sl said:
Who the hell does that?
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Stupid assholes that are ruining it for the rest of us. We need to find that dude and kick him in the nuts. It would be for his own good because there's no way he's going to do that every year and now if he says with the chick she's going to be disappointed every year after that.
 
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