Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Yeah its there. It's just something I'm going to have to do everyday if I want to keep my sanity
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Seems like you're doing a lot of things every day and she's just being a fuckhead about it. She can't change because it's hard and she doesn't want to. Too damned bad. I know you love her, and I certainly don't mean to make light of that, but come on. Marriage is about both of you making an effort, and in this area it seems that you are making 100% of the concessions. Something has to give, man. This will be a contentious issue forever unless her effort level changes. Can she not see that?
 
C

crimsonsin_sl

shitlord
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Noodlemod_sl said:
Yeah its there. It's just something I'm going to have to do everyday if I want to keep my sanity
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Yeah you're on the fast track to divorce my friend. You can swear up and down that it doesn't bother you that much but the resentment is going to build faster then you realize. I used to be on call every other week, Thurs to Thurs, 24 hours a day for four years. It wasnt unusual for me to be pulling 70 hour weeks with a two and four year old at home. I would have to come home, watch her mentally punch out from "watching" the kids and go do whatever she wants. "Theyve been so bad today, its so much work to run a household." Meanwhile my son is running around in a diaper, my daughter is parading around in nothing but undies, theres a box of cheerios strewn about the house which was her idea of feeding them. Clothes that I folded and put away are now completely torn out of their dressers and mixed in with the cheerios mess. Dishes are piled clear out of the sink. Laundry is touching the ceiling because if she cant fold the laundry the moment the dryer is done and it gets wrinkled, she has to rewash the ENTIRE load.

So I would spend the remainder of the evening wrangling my kids, cleaning up her messes, all while getting bitched at that I seem "hostile" and I never spend time with her or the kids I just come home and go straight to "cleaning" and I never spend time with her...on the couch...in the exact same spot I left her that morning with her 3DS playing fucking animal crossing all day. All for it to repeat the next day. You dont fix these kinds of people. You leave them to die in their own messed up little lives because their parents fucked up and there isn't any amount of negotiation, bargaining or begging that's going to get them to act like functioning adults.
 
Phazael

Phazael

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Its another symptom of the larger problem, which boils down to the fact that you thought you weren't marrying her mother but really you are. Its about control and you basically lost it to Princess Noodle, who still rations the BJs, does not work, and now has you cleaning your house after work. The next step will be when she decides to never return to work and just shit out Noodle Spawn and packing on the pounds, completing the transformation into her mother. Harsh, but you need to decide if you are willing to settle for this shit or not and damn quick. You married a princess and cranked out a fuck trophy, so you kind of hosed yourself here, but life is short and if you can't accept this you are young enough to move on. You have to decide if you are going to settle for this, because you sure as shit are not going to change it, which is what we were all warning you about. The mess shit is just the latest symptom of the issue.
 
Famm

Famm

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Noodlemod_sl said:
This ain't why people warned me against her. The whole issue before we got married was lack of sex.
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No it wasn't, it was her behavior. The holding out of sex was just one symptom of the problems everyone was able to intuit from your posts. The mother/family issue with her alone was red flag enough really.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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It's a long story that is documented somewhere in this thread (it might've been on FOH).

We went from having sex 2-3 times a day to 0 for awhile. I think it was the stress of planning a wedding, I really don't know. It was a hot issue for awhile but we came (heh) out of it for the better. It's not an issue anymore.
 
Cad

Cad

scientia potentia est
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Noodlemod_sl said:
It's a long story that is documented somewhere in this thread (it might've been on FOH).

We went from having sex 2-3 times a day to 0 for awhile. I think it was the stress of planning a wedding, I really don't know. It was a hot issue for awhile but we came (heh) out of it for the better. It's not an issue anymore.
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So, would it be unfair to say she has a history of emotional problems?
 
Famm

Famm

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Noodlemod_sl said:
It's a long story that is documented somewhere in this thread (it might've been on FOH).
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When were you engaged? Was it before the end of 2012? I don't remember if it was here or foh either, but I remember having a lot of opinions about the whole thing, I told you to bail!
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Famm_sl said:
When were you engaged? Was it before the end of 2012? I don't remember if it was here or foh either, but I remember having a lot of opinions about the whole thing, I told you to bail!
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We had a long engagement, I think it might've been here
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Wait wait wait

The ghost thing was not me. It was a mentally retarded step sibling and I posted the video here so we could all laugh at him

Edit: I mean to say it was my wedding, but I did not offer that up as proof - i just wanted everyone to laugh at him
 
moontayle

moontayle

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Wife admitted to me several years ago she could never withhold sex to punish me since she enjoys it too much to give it up. So we mostly just yell at each other.
 
Cad

Cad

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The Ancient_sl said:
Yes, I too would like to brag about my sexual prowess in a round-about way.
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I mean by the time you've had sex with her hundreds or thousands of times, you ought to know how to get her off in a big way. If you don't, maybe you SHOULD be ashamed?
 
Deathwing

Deathwing

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Cad_sl said:
I mean by the time you've had sex with her hundreds or thousands of times, you ought to know how to get her off in a big way. If you don't, maybe you SHOULD be ashamed?
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I suspect it's almost spoiled me. Those hour(s)-long fuck sessions are so much fun that when quick sex is the only option, like late on a weeknight, I'm almost like "meh". I'm really not trying to humble brag, I want to want the quick sex too, just can't seem to get motivated for it when compared to just going to be sooner.

Also, finding time to do those long sessions with a toddler in the house is complicating everything and it feels like the frustration is bleeding over.
 
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