Mist Mostly Mightily Blames Other People or MMMBOP for short.

Mist_sl said:

I got offered 50% more money to go work as a help desk supervisor in Groton, so I don't care if I get fired. I don't particularly want that other job because it will be a pain in the ass, but I certainly don't mind losing this one. I can literally do anything any make approximately the same money or more with less stress.

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Are you going to ignore the polite request for nudes?

Stop being such a pussy

Mist_sl said:

If I wanted to sue them, they leave large quantities of alcohol all over the kitchen frequently, and they let an employee with a substance abuse problem get drunk in the NOC and create a very unsafe situation in the workplace.

Even better, on the same day that they gave me the award, HR referred me to a mandatory EAP because my coworkers were concerned about my depression, despite no aggravated incident with a coworker, no impact on performance or disciplinary action, and no imminent suicide threat. Depression is protected by the Americans with Disabilities Act. Forcing me to comply with a mandatory EAP as a condition of continued employment is the very definition of discriminatory under that statute.

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How does leaving alcohol all over the place or enabling an employee with substance abuse problems translate into any rational situation that benefits you monetarily? Yeah, ignore they're paying you less for more work and instead think you have a feels-based lawsuit based on them leaving booze around.

It's more likely you were to sue them because you're depressed and they didn't do anything than you trying to win a lawsuit because you're depressed and employees noticed and referred you through an EAP program. Seriously, the fact you think you have grounds for a lawsuit because you're clinically depressed and your employer is using the EAP which is designed to help employees based on employee concerns? What the literal fuck goes on in your head? The only way they'd get in any trouble or be liable in that scenario is if they DIDN'T refer you through an EAP with reports that you're depressed.

And nobody, most of all me, said you should march in there to personally serve documents from a lawsuit. What I said was if you're actually concerned about your situation (and not just wanting people to feel sorry for you) you need to talk to a professional to see if you even have any legal standing. If you talk to the local department of labor or employment lawyer and they say legally everything your employer is doing is okay, then what grounds do you have to go in and request a raise? Just because you're such a swell person? Your employer obviously doesn't give a shit about you. They're treating you like shit because they're either too ignorant to know better, at which point knowing your legal standing is invaluable, or because they know they can treat you like shit, which again you'll find out quickly by talking to someone whose job it is to know the local employment laws.

What I'm hearing, though, is that you're being treated like shit because you open yourself up to being treated like shit because you think you only deserve to be treated like shit and the only way you can think for people to treat you better is to hope for some sympathy over being treated like shit. Even if you get some sympathy, it's not going to solve your problem. And I don't think you have the fortitude or self-worth to solve the problem by confronting it yourself; if that were the case you'd probably not be in a position of being utterly disrespected as an employee.

People who are naturally respected don't find themselves in the position of having to ask on the internet for advice on how to get respect back. Your employer doesn't respect you, nor will they ever because you aren't a person who comes off as naturally deserving of respect. So, again, your options are to just accept it and try to keep living with it, or go seek out a professional to see if you have some legal basis for getting the respect you aren't getting. Because how do you really think suddenly walking into your bosses office to ask for respect is going to work out?

And it's not about wages, it's about respect. They aren't paying you the same because they don't respect you the same. People who are perceived as being deserving of respect don't one day realize they aren't being respected and have to ask on the internet how they can get the respect they don't really feel they deserve but see other people getting and wonder why they aren't also getting it.

Mist_sl said:

Speaking of pay, I just got the highest award you can get in my department, for outstanding service for working 60+ hour weeks for 6 months straight while we were understaffed due to 4 departures and 3 people on medical leave. Then I find out the two newest guys they hired on my team are making 15% more than I am, even though they have been given basically 0 responsibilities so far, and I am tied for the least pay on the team with some 20 year old kid who avoids work like the plague.

What should I do?

I was going to post this in one of the work threads but refrained from shitting it up. I should get an award for that, too.

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Try to grow your beard out.

I don't think that's sexism. I think that's shifty bosses making desperation hires. They probably can't give you a 15% raise. That's probably a quit and rehire situation, or a find a new employer situation.

She's entitled to nothing!

Important questions I'd want to know answers to: Did they raise anyone other employees wages proportionally to the new-hire rate? Or was it just a way to attract new hires?

Either way it's a shitty business practice. But it'll determine if they don't respect any of their employees, or if you're specifically the one they don't respect.

They won't make it right on their own though, because they're shitty. They will also let you walk, because they're shitty. This is not hard to predict. So there's the choice. Stay in a dead end or accept a commute and hopefully at least slightly less shitty bosses.

That job offer that you have is called leverage. Give them whatever notice is customary. If that's five minutes then it's five minutes.