Parent Thread

lurkingdirk · May 21, 2014

chaos_sl said:
All I can tell you is anecdotally, my father passed on this opportunity twice for me. I don't know what would have happened, who can say? But I do know that the way things played out I got increasingly bored with school and did not take it seriously at all. There are many factors to this. Maybe if my father had been more involved, maybe if I had grown up in a culture that valued education, again, who can say? But if I had that chance, I would give it some serious deliberation and talk with the teachers involved about it. They might have more experience with kids taking this option and can give you some guidance.

Yeah, we're talking to his teachers about this. They obviously have more experience in issues of this matter. When we talked, and showed the out of school things that we're doing, they backed right off. He's in a public school where there are a lot of parents who don't do extra curricular things, and who have pretty crappy home situations, and they like to accelerate kids that show an aptitude if that's the situation. The real trick, I'm told, is to keep the kid stimulated, even if his classroom alone doesn't do it.

His mother and I are both educators, we're not likely to let him get too bored.

Cad · May 21, 2014

Let your kid skip a grade. It'll make him think he's smart (whether he is or not) which is 90% of the battle. Once he realizes that he's good at school he'll excel at it. Unless you think being some social animal is the most important thing about school, let him do it. You're just holding him back, literally, if you don't.

Xarpolis · May 21, 2014

Also, school SHOULD be hard. I had that trouble... school was always easy for me, and as a result, once I finally encountered something hard, I quit. That mind set was with me for a long time before I finally got over myself and actually tried at things.

chaos · May 21, 2014

lurkingdirk_sl said:
Yeah, we're talking to his teachers about this. They obviously have more experience in issues of this matter. When we talked, and showed the out of school things that we're doing, they backed right off. He's in a public school where there are a lot of parents who don't do extra curricular things, and who have pretty crappy home situations, and they like to accelerate kids that show an aptitude if that's the situation. The real trick, I'm told, is to keep the kid stimulated, even if his classroom alone doesn't do it.

His mother and I are both educators, we're not likely to let him get too bored.

Sounds like you have it well in hand, then. Sometimes I want to talk to these kids I go to school with now and explain to them how important it is that they try hard and finish, how hard it is to do later when you realize you squandered opportunities you may not have even realized you had, but I know no one wants to hear that shit and wouldn't listen even if I said it. But I have watched multiple highly intelligent people fuck up their college shit because they are just so above it all, too smart to realize how stupid they are being. Without family support, especially at a young age, I imagine they just have to learn for themselves.

Vandyn · May 22, 2014

Etoille_sl said:
My kid has started signing "more" when Let it Go finishes playing on you tube.

They just announced Disney on Ice will feature Frozen. So of course the tickets have been already bought. At least it's 6 months away.

BrutulTM · May 22, 2014

chaos_sl said:
Sounds like you have it well in hand, then. Sometimes I want to talk to these kids I go to school with now and explain to them how important it is that they try hard and finish, how hard it is to do later when you realize you squandered opportunities you may not have even realized you had, but I know no one wants to hear that shit and wouldn't listen even if I said it. But I have watched multiple highly intelligent people fuck up their college shit because they are just so above it all, too smart to realize how stupid they are being. Without family support, especially at a young age, I imagine they just have to learn for themselves.

It's kind of sad how much your choices in your teens/twenties affect the course of your life since everyone is dumb as hell at that age.

Draegan_sl · May 22, 2014

joeboo_sl said:
Seems to vary wildly, especially by gender. My 12 month old son doesn't say anything beyond mama and dada, and dada just started last week(mama was at maybe 9-10 months). However my friend who had a daughter shortly before our son was talking quite a bit at 9 months. It freaked me out. We took our (at the time) 6 month old over to play with their 9 month old, and his daughter pointed at our son and said "BABY" and then "HI". Freaked me right out, didn't expect that from a kid that young. They have an older son, and said he didn't do that until almost 18 months. It's weird how that kind of development can be so drastically different, especially given the exact same parents/surroundings/environment.

My daughter is now 13 months and has been saying dada and mama for a long time now. She really says Dada with "meaning" now when she wants something which is adorable. She kind of babbles words like balloon and other stuff. My friends daugher who turns 2 in august started talking early around this time.

Joeboo · May 22, 2014

Yeah, outside mama and dada, he's close to some other words. He'll be playing with a ball and go "ba-ba-ba-ba-ba" or he'll mimic "no-no-no-no" after well tell him NO to something, but he doesn't really say "no" with any real meaning or context. Little bastard mimics everything we do though. Every time I sneeze he looks at me an yells, thinking that's what I'm doing since it's loud.

Crone · May 23, 2014

joeboo_sl said:
Yeah, outside mama and dada, he's close to some other words. He'll be playing with a ball and go "ba-ba-ba-ba-ba" or he'll mimic "no-no-no-no" after well tell him NO to something, but he doesn't really say "no" with any real meaning or context. Little bastard mimics everything we do though. Every time I sneeze he looks at me an yells, thinking that's what I'm doing since it's loud.

My 13 month old will giggle hysterically anytime anyone around him sneezes, and he's started to fake sneeze as well because he thinks it's funny.

OneofOne · May 25, 2014

lurkingdirk_sl said:
So we're having an issue that's not really a bad issue, but it's something to think about. My youngest kid just turned six, is finishing Kindergarten. His teachers are strongly recommending that he skip first grade, as he's doing second grade math and reading already now. They're afraid he's just going to be so bored in first grade that he'll act out.

Now, he's also about the smallest in his class. He's just plain a little guy. Also, I don't think he's socially ready to be with older kids. I think he'd pick it up, but it would be rough at first.

Outside of school, this kid is in hockey (all year), takes weekly violin lessons, and has a big group of close friends with a huge range of ages. He's also in an art class that meets twice a week through the summer, in addition to hockey camps. He gets a lot of stimulation and learning situations away from school, which makes me think that even if he isn't being challenged at school, he is still being challenged in general.

We're not likely to advance him, but I'm curious as to other's thoughts on this matter. This is new to us, as none of our other kids has performed so high in their given classes. They're all bright, but the youngest seems to master school subjects incredibly easily. He's reading almost as well as the 10 year old, to be honest.

Well, I'm late to the party, but thought I'd add my two cents, as someone who skipped a grade. I was restless and bored in 2nd grade, so the teacher told my parents I should skip 3rd, so I'd actually have to pay attention and yadda yadda. Turns out it didn't help a whole lot because public schools are taught for the lowest common denominator, so I was still bored, barely tried, and ended up with absolutely horrible habits that led into my adult life. So skipping a grade did nothing in that respect, but it did get me out of school a year earlier than I'd have otherwise, and I do think that's good. I can't imagine being in high school at 18 - I'd have been in so much trouble from goofing around. On the social side of things, I dunno. I had an uncommon experience in going to 8 different schools during my 11 year education (3 different high schools), so that skews my experience.

Honestly if your son is so intelligent, and he's going to public schools, I don't see any reason he shouldn't be out and entering the next part of his life ASAP. Look at it this way - what is your son going to gain from an extra year in the public school system?

Falstaff · May 30, 2014

4 teeth coming in at once. Thanks Obama!

Joeboo · May 30, 2014

Eyashusa_sl said:
4 teeth coming in at once. Thanks Obama!

We went through that, our kid popped in 8 teeth(4 up and 4 down) in the span of like 6 weeks when he was around 8-10 months old. It was pure hell, he was pissy all the time, didn't sleep well, etc. Luckily it seems like since we got that many all at once, he hasn't had any come in since then so we've had several months now of calm and quiet and everyone is happy. It might actually be easier to pop a bunch in real quick and then maybe have a few months of respite, instead of 1 at a time dragging out forever.

Falstaff · May 30, 2014

Yeah her two bottom teeth came in at the same time like 6 months ago she was 5 months old... that was like 1 day of agony. So far it's been about a week but sleeping has been okay, she just needs to be snuggled a bit instead of just laying her down like we've been accustomed to the last few months.

Luckily no fever or any other illness symptoms, just can tell they are bothering her as she claws at her ears and the back of her head.

OneofOne · May 30, 2014

Ok anyone with experience with their kids in daycare, curious on your thoughts. Situation is this. Kid is in daycare, but parents are going to pull kid out of daycare for 3 months since they are going out of town. Provider will want a fee to hold the child's spot in the 3 months they are out of town. What's fair in this situation?

Also (and I've never heard of this before) the provider continues charging during her yearly 2 week vacation, in which she's obviously not taking care of the kids. Is this... normal?

chaos · May 30, 2014

That is some straight bullshit right there.

lurkingdirk · May 30, 2014

So, the daycare should just decide they're going to make less money because you're pulling your child out for three months, even though there is a waiting list of people who would gladly pay that fee?

And as far as the two week vacation thing - you just have to think of it this way: You're paying a certain fee to have daycare. That fee is paid over 52 weeks. The care doesn't necessarily happen for those weeks, but that's the payment plan. Does your employer let you go on vacation? Do you have to provide someone to do the work you would normally do during that time?

A good day care is worth a lot. It may feel like bullshit, but when you start looking at it from an employee's perspective, it doesn't seem all that strange.

chaos · May 30, 2014

You are way too understanding. You are paying for a service, they aren't magicians, they make sure kids don't kill each other or themselves while you are at work. Sure, I want to be understanding, but what the hell are you supposed to do for those 2 weeks? And yeah, I mean, if they can't hold a kid's spot then they can't hold a kid's spot, but charging a full fee when care is not being provided is just bullshit. I would find another provider, and at least where I live there is no shortage of them.

Deathwing · May 31, 2014

A good daycare will do more than just prevent infanticide. [etoille]if that's all you expect out of your daycare, you aren't raising your kids right[/etoille]

As for the 3 month fee, yeah, that sounds reasonable to me. Charging during her vacation? Eh...it may feel like bullshit, but it's not. That is her job, she expects and (hopefully)budgets to make X dollars per year. That amount is important because it's her income, especially if there is a lot of local competition. Now, she can be smart about it and just charge you those X dollars over 50 weeks instead of 52, but what's the difference really?

chaos · May 31, 2014

I realize I'm being a little Tanoomba, but it isn't rocket surgery. It is taking care of kids. Maybe it is because I have only used corporate places, I can't imagine paying them while they shut down their offices for two weeks for vacation. I just wouldn't want to get a provider where two weeks out of the year not only am I going to have to pay her to do nothing, but also find and pay another provider for those two weeks. Or even worse risk using two weeks of my own leave. I would find another provider.

iannis · May 31, 2014

Not a parent -- I'd have the kid skip the grade. Socially it'll be a little bit harder on him, but that's luck of the draw shit that you can't influence very much even at the best of times. I only dimly remember how life was at that age but what I do remember is that if the bully decided to pick on you your life becomes shit anyway. And bullies do not need a reason beyond "you're next". You just have more direct influence on the quality of his mechanical education than the nature of his social education to begin with. So play to his strength. Is how I'd view it at least.

Not a parent. Don't know shit. Just seems to make sense.

Parent Thread

AssHat Taint

scientia potentia est

Life's a Dream

Buzzfeed Editor

Blackwing Lair Raider

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.

2 Minutes Hate

Molten Core Raider

Bronze Baronet of the Realm

Silver Baronet of the Realm

Ahn'Qiraj Raider

Molten Core Raider

Ahn'Qiraj Raider

Silver Baronet of the Realm

Buzzfeed Editor

AssHat Taint

Buzzfeed Editor

Buzzfeed Editor

Musty Nester