- 46,611
- 214,472
Ha, thanks! I actually managed to run electricity out there, so they could mostly shut the window shutters, and turn on the light, and all is well!
No one tell me how many times my kids will smoke out there when they get older...
Parent Thread
- Thread starter Hatorade
- Start date
-
Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
No one tell me how many times my kids will smoke out there when they get older...
Quaid
Trump's Staff
- 11,782
- 8,267
So, I'm concerned about my son's development, and have been for quite some time.
He's 21 months old, very large for his age. Top 2% according to growth charts, and he dwarfs most other children his age. His gross motor skills have always been quite impressive, and he's been taking stairs and big tall slides at the park fearlessly for a couple months now. Runs, climbs, etc with the best of them.
He's missing milestones, some by significant measures of time, and it's freaking me out. At his 18 month checkup the results of a checklist caused our doctor to send him to a language specialist. They said he was behind, but nothing to worry about. He uses almost no words unless prompted, even basic ones like 'mama' or 'baba'. We can get him to say 'up', 'more', 'done', 'outside', and a couple others with a lot of encouragement. Just not using words on his own almost at all. It's strange, because I know he has a large number of words he understands (animals, vehicles, body parts, foods etc).
He's a super happy and affectionate dude, not shy at all, loves other kids. Very expressive facially, and gets super excited about seeing people or things he loves. He doesn't seem to like to communicate with gestures very much. He reaches to be picked up, gives high fives, or takes you by the hand to lead you to something he wants, but will never point to what he wants. I've never seen him clap his hands, and he hasn't waved 'bye bye' in months. He will point to objects in a book he wants identified, but never in the surrounding environment. If I asked him 'where's your tummy', he wouldn't understand or point, despite the fact that I know he knows what a tummy is.
The worst shit, and what's making me worry about Autism is the limited eye-contact and his reluctance to answer to his name when I call him. Some days I go totally without meaningful eye contact, and most of the time it's only very brief. He will engage me in the eyes for longer periods if he's having a GREAT time, like I'm throwing him up in the air or something. Calling his name 95% of the time is an exercise in futility. Say 'cookie' or 'Bubble Guppies' or 'blankie' or 'car', though? Watch him snap to fucking attention.
He doesn't do any odd behavioural stuff like arm flapping, or covering ears or anything like that. No lining up objects, and he plays with toys just fine. Doesn't care about routines and is generally easy going, not a very picky eater besides hating anything remotely vegetable-like obviously. He's honestly so chill, loving, and joyful... I just don't get it. Every time I google this stuff (I know, I know) it throws back autism at me. Maybe I have a limited understanding of the condition, but this doesn't look like autism to me...
Anyway, just venting. The wife and I have been worried for months. Trying to stay cool until his 2 year checkup. Just have to keep reminding myself to enjoy him, and that I'm fucking missing it.
*breathe*
He's 21 months old, very large for his age. Top 2% according to growth charts, and he dwarfs most other children his age. His gross motor skills have always been quite impressive, and he's been taking stairs and big tall slides at the park fearlessly for a couple months now. Runs, climbs, etc with the best of them.
He's missing milestones, some by significant measures of time, and it's freaking me out. At his 18 month checkup the results of a checklist caused our doctor to send him to a language specialist. They said he was behind, but nothing to worry about. He uses almost no words unless prompted, even basic ones like 'mama' or 'baba'. We can get him to say 'up', 'more', 'done', 'outside', and a couple others with a lot of encouragement. Just not using words on his own almost at all. It's strange, because I know he has a large number of words he understands (animals, vehicles, body parts, foods etc).
He's a super happy and affectionate dude, not shy at all, loves other kids. Very expressive facially, and gets super excited about seeing people or things he loves. He doesn't seem to like to communicate with gestures very much. He reaches to be picked up, gives high fives, or takes you by the hand to lead you to something he wants, but will never point to what he wants. I've never seen him clap his hands, and he hasn't waved 'bye bye' in months. He will point to objects in a book he wants identified, but never in the surrounding environment. If I asked him 'where's your tummy', he wouldn't understand or point, despite the fact that I know he knows what a tummy is.
The worst shit, and what's making me worry about Autism is the limited eye-contact and his reluctance to answer to his name when I call him. Some days I go totally without meaningful eye contact, and most of the time it's only very brief. He will engage me in the eyes for longer periods if he's having a GREAT time, like I'm throwing him up in the air or something. Calling his name 95% of the time is an exercise in futility. Say 'cookie' or 'Bubble Guppies' or 'blankie' or 'car', though? Watch him snap to fucking attention.
He doesn't do any odd behavioural stuff like arm flapping, or covering ears or anything like that. No lining up objects, and he plays with toys just fine. Doesn't care about routines and is generally easy going, not a very picky eater besides hating anything remotely vegetable-like obviously. He's honestly so chill, loving, and joyful... I just don't get it. Every time I google this stuff (I know, I know) it throws back autism at me. Maybe I have a limited understanding of the condition, but this doesn't look like autism to me...
Anyway, just venting. The wife and I have been worried for months. Trying to stay cool until his 2 year checkup. Just have to keep reminding myself to enjoy him, and that I'm fucking missing it.
*breathe*
Quaid, from what you're saying he seems like a normal toddler boy. I really wouldn't stress at this point.
Kids that age, especially boys, are on wheels and go go go so stuff like eye contact, name response and language skills can be really hit or miss. Boys are just naturally delayed a lot of times with that stuff. They are also beginning to enjoy independence and getting ready to push limits in the terrible 2's. Pretty normal IMO.
I assume he has a favorite toy or something he has bonded with? You mention blankie.
He is talking, knows words as you said he responds to them even if its not his name.
Now its impossible to say from a forum post but IMO, he sounds like a normal 21 month old boy. I wouldn't stress about if he does X at Y time. Only worry about him progressing and developing as he grows up and work with him on the stuff that he is lacking on.
No one is a super star at everything. My daughter is shy, not the most physically aggressive (slides / swings and such) and generally really reserved around others. She will also talk my ear off with gibberish, loves flash cards, knows a LOT of words and has always been more of intellectual type as opposed to the I'm going to run over to X and climb up it so I can jump off. Just not her thing. So if you compare her to a physically active kid at the park she might look a little behind. Then if you take that active kid and try to sit them down to identify 75 flash cards at near 100% accuracy they'd probably not do nearly as well.
So long as they are progressing, you encourage them to push their limits and work with them with the things they need help with they will develop and grow up just fine. Your little guy sounds pretty normal to me.
Kids that age, especially boys, are on wheels and go go go so stuff like eye contact, name response and language skills can be really hit or miss. Boys are just naturally delayed a lot of times with that stuff. They are also beginning to enjoy independence and getting ready to push limits in the terrible 2's. Pretty normal IMO.
I assume he has a favorite toy or something he has bonded with? You mention blankie.
He is talking, knows words as you said he responds to them even if its not his name.
Now its impossible to say from a forum post but IMO, he sounds like a normal 21 month old boy. I wouldn't stress about if he does X at Y time. Only worry about him progressing and developing as he grows up and work with him on the stuff that he is lacking on.
No one is a super star at everything. My daughter is shy, not the most physically aggressive (slides / swings and such) and generally really reserved around others. She will also talk my ear off with gibberish, loves flash cards, knows a LOT of words and has always been more of intellectual type as opposed to the I'm going to run over to X and climb up it so I can jump off. Just not her thing. So if you compare her to a physically active kid at the park she might look a little behind. Then if you take that active kid and try to sit them down to identify 75 flash cards at near 100% accuracy they'd probably not do nearly as well.
So long as they are progressing, you encourage them to push their limits and work with them with the things they need help with they will develop and grow up just fine. Your little guy sounds pretty normal to me.
monnoh
Golden Squire
- 149
- 71
Hey man, I think it's normal that you're worried but also that you're possibly overanalysing this. Autism spectrum is EXTREMELY broad nowadays (Asperger's and PDD-NOS are also considered to be "on the spectrum") and if you're gonna look for some of the characteristics in your kid, chances are you're always gonna find something. Now, I am not a doctor, but my dad is autistic (Asperger's) and my GF's niece is also on the spectrum. They're both extremely intelligent, but don't handle social situations well. For example, it took years for my GF's niece to make any eye contact AT ALL with me, and only when we're both teasing my GF (when we're being "partners in crime"). She's also really shy around kids that aren't family (as in: doesn't talk to them or looks at them), clings to routine and is a real hoarder. Sounds like your kid may exhibit some of the characteristics, but it doesn't really compare to the experiences I have with people on the spectrum. Also kids can be slower or faster in some aspects and they change.
I guess what I'm trying to say is why not give doctor Google M.D. a rest and see what his checkup brings?
Larnix
Blackwing Lair Raider
- 568
- 2,619
We have son that this almost 2 and a half years old. He sounds much like your son at that age, he only plays on the big kid stuff at the playground, up and down steps on his own, can climb up just about anything. He also didn't talk much at all until he was just past 2 years old and then it was truly an explosion of words. To be honest we were also starting to get a little worried about his speech but it coming along great. Now he still has trouble with some words but if mom or dad say a bad word that is instants for him. At this age his favorite thing to do is ignore us unless we are doing something fun.
Joeboo
Molten Core Raider
- 8,157
- 140
My two year old took FOREVER to say his name. He probably knew 100+ words before he would say his name, even though he heard it every single day. He knew & could say complicated words like watermelon, or doorknob, or remote control, but wouldn't say his name until just recently.(He actually turns 2 today, and just started saying his name maybe 2 weeks ago) Hell, he could identify every letter of the alphabet and every number 1-10 before he would say his name(and his name is simple, 1 syllable). Of course now that he can say his name, he somehow also learned the concept of "MINE". Lovely.
Izo
Tranny Chaser
- 19,444
- 23,508
Pablo Diego Jos? Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno Mar?a de los Remedios Cipriano de la Sant?sima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso? Spanish kids must take forever to master their names. Bob. Boooooooob. Easy.
It's not scientific, but I have two pediatrician friends and they both said the bigger kids they see tend to be farther behind on milestones.
chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
- 17,324
- 4,839
Those milestones bro, I wish I had never read any of those books. I was so worried, at one point I was convinced one of my daughters had ADD and would suddenly snap into autism or something. She still displays certain symptoms of autism, but it doesn't work like that. When I tried to tell the doctor that she didn't respond when I called her name he told me "She's ignoring you because she's a 2 year old, lighten up."
All I can tell you is pick the best pediatrician you can reasonably get and trust their judgement. My pediatrician has been practicing longer than I have been alive, if he tells me to chill out I chill out. If he tells me to have my daughter evaluated for speech therapy through the county services, I do (and did). I still worry like crazy but I trust the Dr.
All I can tell you is pick the best pediatrician you can reasonably get and trust their judgement. My pediatrician has been practicing longer than I have been alive, if he tells me to chill out I chill out. If he tells me to have my daughter evaluated for speech therapy through the county services, I do (and did). I still worry like crazy but I trust the Dr.
Cad
scientia potentia est
- 25,426
- 49,042
Don't get too excited about missing milestones. None of my boys would say so much as 1 intelligible word before 2 years old, and one of them for a while after that. Both of the ones in school are in gifted and talented programs now and read 5 grade levels above their grade..
Kids will develop when they develop. Especially boys.
Latest Parenting Trend: The CTFD MethodDavid Vienna
^ For srs and this is not a slam. It's just good advice.
Kids will develop when they develop. Especially boys.
Latest Parenting Trend: The CTFD MethodDavid Vienna
^ For srs and this is not a slam. It's just good advice.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
- 38,272
- 15,096
Man on the topic of pediatricians I picked one at random and she had such a juicy ass and titties I don't think I heard a word she said
- 46,611
- 214,472
Quaid,
some of my very best friends had a parallel experience. Their son (second of two children) is enormous - tall and a little chubby. But tall like holy crap. When he was two, they had exactly the same experience. Their son seemed mostly non-responsive to oral queues, he never spoke (he had maybe 5 words by two), and he seemed to lack curiosity about most things in his environment. By two and a half, they went back to the doctor, who suggested they start some testing, not necessarily for autism, but to see if professionals could find ways to stimulate him into interacting with his environment and so forth.
Before they began the testing around a month later, he completely transformed. Like overnight. He started speaking with full sentences, not huge, complex ones, but things like "That dog is barking." He also became much more affectionate once he was able to start communicating with people around him, and eye contact has never been a problem since.
Will this be your experience? Of course we can't say, but do know that others feel your pain, and patience is so important in situations like this. Patience, and keeping track of things. Sounds like you're doing fine on the latter. Fear is a brutal destroyer of patience. Hang in there, man. This could change incredibly fast.
some of my very best friends had a parallel experience. Their son (second of two children) is enormous - tall and a little chubby. But tall like holy crap. When he was two, they had exactly the same experience. Their son seemed mostly non-responsive to oral queues, he never spoke (he had maybe 5 words by two), and he seemed to lack curiosity about most things in his environment. By two and a half, they went back to the doctor, who suggested they start some testing, not necessarily for autism, but to see if professionals could find ways to stimulate him into interacting with his environment and so forth.
Before they began the testing around a month later, he completely transformed. Like overnight. He started speaking with full sentences, not huge, complex ones, but things like "That dog is barking." He also became much more affectionate once he was able to start communicating with people around him, and eye contact has never been a problem since.
Will this be your experience? Of course we can't say, but do know that others feel your pain, and patience is so important in situations like this. Patience, and keeping track of things. Sounds like you're doing fine on the latter. Fear is a brutal destroyer of patience. Hang in there, man. This could change incredibly fast.
chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
- 17,324
- 4,839
Yeah I picked and old, ornery man for that very reason. But he hires the hottest nurses. Best of both worlds, bro.
Quaid
Trump's Staff
- 11,782
- 8,267
Thanks for the truth session guys.
The googling/reading has been a real nightmare. I'm the first of my friends to have a kid, and it's been my only real source of information. Some of the information on mommy-blogs/forums is just absolute garbage, and everything I read is telling me to be TERRIFIED OF AUTISM IF YOUR KID DOESN'T HAVE 22 WORDS BY 18 MONTHS. Fuck sakes.
At his 18 month checkup back in December, where he 'failed' his little 18 question checklist, his doctor said something interesting. He's a brilliant 50 year old neurologist who switched to pediatrics when he moved to Canada with two children of his own. My trust in him is very very high:
"Of 20 children we administer this test to who don't pass, 18 are boys. Only 1 of those 18 who we send for evaluation will actually have something that may need to be treated. The fact is there are gender differences that we aren't supposed to talk about"
Not to turn this thread into another gender issues debate, but this comment really fueled my recent interest in the current climate of being/raising a man in the west. It's getting to the point where what you think are authorities you can trust (government, medical community etc) are ignoring biological truths in the name of an 'equality' agenda. I thought raising a boy would be 'easier', but it turns out there are some serious issues I really need to watch out for.
The googling/reading has been a real nightmare. I'm the first of my friends to have a kid, and it's been my only real source of information. Some of the information on mommy-blogs/forums is just absolute garbage, and everything I read is telling me to be TERRIFIED OF AUTISM IF YOUR KID DOESN'T HAVE 22 WORDS BY 18 MONTHS. Fuck sakes.
At his 18 month checkup back in December, where he 'failed' his little 18 question checklist, his doctor said something interesting. He's a brilliant 50 year old neurologist who switched to pediatrics when he moved to Canada with two children of his own. My trust in him is very very high:
"Of 20 children we administer this test to who don't pass, 18 are boys. Only 1 of those 18 who we send for evaluation will actually have something that may need to be treated. The fact is there are gender differences that we aren't supposed to talk about"
Not to turn this thread into another gender issues debate, but this comment really fueled my recent interest in the current climate of being/raising a man in the west. It's getting to the point where what you think are authorities you can trust (government, medical community etc) are ignoring biological truths in the name of an 'equality' agenda. I thought raising a boy would be 'easier', but it turns out there are some serious issues I really need to watch out for.
Quaid
Trump's Staff
- 11,782
- 8,267
Cad
scientia potentia est
- 25,426
- 49,042
Little boys can definitely just like to eat, drink, shit, and run around and hit things and throw things until a certain age. Girls are MUCH smarter in general (and interested in learning) until boys can be conditioned to sit still and learn. A lot of modern schooling goes directly against what little boys "want" to do.
Quaid
Trump's Staff
- 11,782
- 8,267
This is the test I was speaking of. I was forced to answer a definitive 'no' to 4 of these, and 'sometimes/kinda' to 2.
Your child's enhanced 18-month well-baby visit
Some of these questions though, I mean, SHOULD my kid be behaving in this way? Pointing at things to get my attention? Asking for help? Stacking blocks? He doesn't give a fuck about blocks. He likes cars. According to who is this 'standard' behaviour?
Maybe he's just an introvert like his father...
My son kinda had similar issues. We had twins, a boy and a girl, and for a while, it was like night and day with their development. She picked up words faster, was generally more attentive, etc. It got to the point where I seriously thought something was wrong with him, even though our checkups with the pediatrician never confirmed this. It was right around the age you mentioned as well, almost 2. I can't remember the exact moment when it changed (they just turned 5), but it was almost like he just flipped a switch. Started picking up words, speaking in more complete sentences, being generally more outgoing. Now, with school coming up for them soon, I'm a lot less worried about how he'll take to that than I was three years ago.
Falstaff
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
- 8,400
- 3,333
This is the same as my wife's OB. I go to every appointment just so I can see her.
And to support my wife.
Woefully Inept
Karazhan Raider
- 9,266
- 36,831
Ok no more ranting and raving. The union rep went to bat for my wife today and unofficial word is that she has her 15 days and they will officially meet again on Monday. HUUUUUUUUUGE load off our shoulders. phew.
They acknowledged they fucked up and didn't meet with all committee members so the meeting Monday will count as the first meeting and not the 3rd which is what it really is. And because of this they were able to clarify the policy so that this does not happen to anyone else going forward. Win win for everyone.
They acknowledged they fucked up and didn't meet with all committee members so the meeting Monday will count as the first meeting and not the 3rd which is what it really is. And because of this they were able to clarify the policy so that this does not happen to anyone else going forward. Win win for everyone.