Edaw
Parody
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Vasectomy Inc
- Thread starter Adebisi
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Cutlery
Kill All the White People
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Well.....
I think a week or 3 after I had mine, after the pain had subsided down to a reasonable level, the ex gave me a handy in the shower, and we're both glad she chose that method and place, because it was straight blood.
The fucked up thing was, when I brought that up to the 2nd opinion doc, he was like "oh, I wouldn't worry about that."
You wouldn't? Because out of all of my symptoms, this is the one I'm worried about the most! Holy shit!
Imagine how crazy that is for a minute. You've got an orifice that does not eject blood, that all of a sudden does, and the doctor is like "don't see the problem." Just imagine that happening with anything other than a men's health issue. Fucking ridiculous.
It was probably the most traumatic sexual experience of my life. Either that or that chick losing the vibrator in her ass. One of the two.
I think a week or 3 after I had mine, after the pain had subsided down to a reasonable level, the ex gave me a handy in the shower, and we're both glad she chose that method and place, because it was straight blood.
The fucked up thing was, when I brought that up to the 2nd opinion doc, he was like "oh, I wouldn't worry about that."
You wouldn't? Because out of all of my symptoms, this is the one I'm worried about the most! Holy shit!
Imagine how crazy that is for a minute. You've got an orifice that does not eject blood, that all of a sudden does, and the doctor is like "don't see the problem." Just imagine that happening with anything other than a men's health issue. Fucking ridiculous.
It was probably the most traumatic sexual experience of my life. Either that or that chick losing the vibrator in her ass. One of the two.
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Aldarion
Egg Nazi
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Its like everything I read about the procedure is deliberate lies. Fucking 3 weeks til sex and when you do its a fountain of blood?
In a sane world, that should be immediate loss of medical license for the doctor and a fat medical malpractice payout for pain and suffering for you.
Instead we live in a world where literally everything I read says "it'll be fine, in and out, np".
Cad
scientia potentia est
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Clean nut is just an FOH joke from the Johnny49 days. He used to talk about clean nuts, just sounds funny. No idea what it really means.
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Cad
scientia potentia est
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That is really fucked up man, I'm sorry. Knowing how they do the procedure I'm really mind boggled how it could be blood. Just makes no sense, they must have really botched that procedure.
Cad
scientia potentia est
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You could be right, was it Lyrical/ShoNuff? Wasn't that the same person on a new account? I could be getting my degenerates mixed up.
Cutlery
Kill All the White People
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So, for those of you who haven't seen it, this is the original post of mine. Been almost 10 years since I made it, so I thought I'd go back and find it just to make sure my memory was correct. I had forgotten about missing the Nightwish concert. I was driving a forklift at the time and it was almost impossible to work too. Every time I hit the dock plate going in and out of a truck, it was absolutely excruciating.
Nowadays I have more problems when the sex frequency changes. If the gal and I take a vacation and we're banging like teenagers again, and I don't get any for a few days after that, then I'm in a lot of pain. If we're super busy and haven't had a chance in awhile, then try to make up for it on the weekend, again with the pain. Best thing for me seems to be having a consistent frequency of sex, otherwise it's just brutal. I still am at a loss about how any of this is physiologically possible, because I know what the procedure is. I watched it happen. It was 2 incisions, 2 snips, 2 tubes being tied off, and 2 stitches.
11 years of pain. Some constant, some intermittent. But, super orgasms....so......
Cad
scientia potentia est
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It seems without a doubt they tied something up in the nerves inadvertently, although I don't think the big nerve bundle that runs through there is all that close to where they should have been cutting. When they numb the area to do the procedure the shot should go in the nerve that innervates the vas deferens, so it's not that far away, but no idea how they would involve that.
Without them cutting you again, can you go get an MRI to check the status of everything there? I wish they'd actually investigate shit and not just write it off.
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It was the rock hard weekend guy. Didn’t he own something to do with that stuff. He would come here and talk about using it and having clean nuts.
Control
Bronze Baronet of the Realm
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His clean nut post sounded like a ridiculous, hardcore affiliate ad. I assumed he read an affiliate ebook or something and tried to peddle his wares on us. He denied it, but it was an affiliate link he posted, so:
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Metalhead
Vyemm Raider
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I had it done a couple years back. In and out, took them like 10-15 minutes probably but they had me on gas so not 100% sure. No side effects other than sometimes when I first get an erection I get a small dull pain in my ballsack that goes away after a minute or so. More like an ache/soreness than real pain.
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God damnit, I'm considering going back condoms instead. Wife is on a medication that reduces effectiveness of the pill, so that's not an option. And neither is pulling out. I thought it funny that the wife put her foot down on that one. Not because it's relatively ineffective as a contraceptive, but because she doesn't like the "abruptness". After she's gotten all the orgasms she can handle.
I feel like I'm buying computer parts but instead it's an operation for my balls. I've called up a few places and grilled the nurses/receptionist for details on operations they don't know(that well). Maybe I shouldn't know them that well either, but after reading this thread, I feel like I should go with newest and bestest shit.
All of this is starting to make my balls ache, ironically.
I feel like I'm buying computer parts but instead it's an operation for my balls. I've called up a few places and grilled the nurses/receptionist for details on operations they don't know(that well). Maybe I shouldn't know them that well either, but after reading this thread, I feel like I should go with newest and bestest shit.
All of this is starting to make my balls ache, ironically.
To add to the anecdotes, got cauterized a few years back. Local anesthetic, small incision, pull it out, cut, cauterize, tie it off. No side effects after healing. Birth control was messing with my wife, so this was a great option for us since we were done with kids. Highly recommended.
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I had no problems with mine. Had some minor aching for a couple days after if I lifted anything heavy, but that's it. No pain ever, no blood ever, no noticeable difference in my orgasms. It was a perfect solution for us, worked out well.
Scoresby
Trakanon Raider
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No issues after on my end. The day of my doctor had an emergency and was at a nearby hospital in surgery, so my procedure was delayed 2 hours. They had brought me in and prepped me before finding that out though, so I was sitting on a table with my nuts poked through a surgical sheet and a napkin on top the whole time.
The worst part, they had applied anesthesia when I first came in but didn't do anything when he finally shows up later. I am thankful the knife was sharp at least as I had some feeling at that point.
The worst part, they had applied anesthesia when I first came in but didn't do anything when he finally shows up later. I am thankful the knife was sharp at least as I had some feeling at that point.
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