What tickles your pickle

I work for a ~300 person engineering firm and about 2/3rds of our staff is either in Seattle or Portland. Our CEO is a really, really nice guy, but he's pretty far left and kept showing Black Lives Matter stuff during company meetings all through the Floyd riots.

Anyways, the CEO just called me to tell me his son wants to move to where I live (rural farming community) because there's a good automotive program at the college and his son wants to be a mechanic. After beating around the bush for a few minutes, he said his son "....might be going through those rebellious teenage years or something because he has himself convinced that he hates Seattle now because everyone is a communist....". I laughed my godamn ass off when he said that and I'm pretty sure he thought I was laughing at how ridiculous the statement was right up until I said "So there IS hope for the next generation!", then he replied with "Haha oh man, looks like I called the right person. He likes building stuff, guns and UFC and my wife and I would feel better if we knew he could find a group of friends in the area, so I just wanted to see if you'd be willing to show him around when he gets there". I told him I'd be happy to and that some of our UFC parties have all 3 at the same time, but promised I'd send him back home alive and with at least 8 fingers. Lol, that call just made my day.

edit: Oh, and I very briefly met the kid last week when they were in town to scout the area out over the weekend. I didn't know it at the time, but the CEO brought his son in to meet me and I was on a call with 2 people from our Portland office when they stopped in. He gave a quick introduction....kid looks like a stone-faced farmboy and gave a good handshake, but we didn't talk at all. I'm sure he'll fit right in.

We have a big work event tomorrow, so I got a haircut on my way back to the office from some field work today. When I got back, one person told me I looked like Commander Shepherd, one person told me I looked like Edward Norton in American History X, and the guy that sits next to me told me I look like "a little twink faggot".

I was going to put this in the rustled jimmies thread, but Edward Norton is a bad mf'er.

He did not specify. Hopefully he wasn't talking about Andromeda...

Bandwagon said:

We have a big work event tomorrow, so I got a haircut on my way back to the office from some field work today. When I got back, one person told me I looked like Commander Shepherd, one person told me I looked like Edward Norton in American History X, and the guy that sits next to me told me I look like "a little twink faggot".

I was going to put this in the rustled jimmies thread, but Edward Norton is a bad mf'er.

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We have a new "Talent acquisition specialist" that I met at our work party last week. When I took my mask off, she said "Has anyone ever told you that you look like Justin Timberlake?". I blushed and told her that I haven't heard that in a decade, but thanks for the compliment! I'm going to have to give my barber a bigger tip next time, because I guess he dropped some magic on me with this haircut.

The survey manager heard her say that and he told my friends about it at the house party this weekend. All of my friends shit on my ego for 5 minutes with-
"Yea, maybe Justin Timberlake after 2 years on meth."
"Justin Timberlake's white trash cousin"
"QANON Justin Timberlake"
"Did she forget to put her contacts in?"
"She's definitely thinking of one of the backstreet boys, not Justin Timberlake"
"Did she change it to Yosemite Sam after she heard you talk?"

Hoss said:

Post pics of her. Then when you inevitably bang (because that was flirting), be sure to post pics of her dick too.

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Nah, I used to get that all the fucking time when I was tan & in-shape when I worked in Hawaii. 95% of the time it's women in their 40s or 50s who're starting to lose their vision, lol. Seems like women my age always say I "remind" them of a character based on personality more than looks. I always get the guy from 50 shades of grey (because I'm a dirty bird) or "Lip" from some netflix show (because I'm white trash with an above average IQ, I guess).

edit: One of the guys at that place that I worked always had people telling him that he looked like a young Danny Trejo, so I'll sure as fuck take any of my look-a-likes over his (I get Brenden Fraser, Elija Wood a lot, and Jennifer Grey more than once....wtf).

edit2: speaking of 50 shades of grey, I told one of my friends at work about the stripper/grizzly story that I just posted in the J49 thread last week because he was telling me about a strip club story. He went to a club for a bachelor party and one of the groomsmen instaskeeted the second the stripper stuck her hand down his pants. I told him my story, and that I have the opposite problem because the stripper put her hand in my pants and said "Am I not doing it for ya?" when she discovered the epitome of flaccid. Told him that I told her "It takes more than set of tits to get me going. You're going to have to tie me up, drag me down the hallway and get all the other girls to kick me in the stomach if you want to get me going". We were laughing our asses off and trying to play it off when one of the field engineers came in to see what we were talking about.

I don't really take that as flirting. I tell girls the same thing if I notice it. I think I'm lucky that the way I look doesn't get in the way, but I'm not drowning in pussy or getting swarmed by women because of it. I'm not 'hot', I'm just not ugly. I have friends that get swarmed when we go out. My brother-in-law is 6'4", handsome af, and kind of an amateur body builder. If we go out to the bar, he'll have a gaggle of 10s trying to mount his fucking face within 10 minutes.

I've seen him get drunk, demand a blowjob in the middle of a bar, chug a girl's beer and throw a bag of fruity snacks 90mph at her face while calling her a cunt and still get laid that night. I'm out of the running the first time I use 'faggot' in a sentence.

Some coworkers started an LGBT+ book/movie club and used a shared Google doc to add recommendations for others. I used a throwaway Gmail account to add Ms. Doubtfire and White Chick's to the spreadsheet.

This is the alleyway behind work. Normally, you'd find needles and human shit here if an unhoused democrat or two set up shop for the night. I've gotten in full blown fights with streetkids and crackheads here. This morning, I see two empty cans of whipped cream. It's kind of endearing, really.

Also this.
One of the engineers is OCD as fuck and has been on the verge of a mental breakdown because of people putting the toilet roll on backwards or not putting it on at all. So a few of the other engineers have spent the last 2 weeks fucking with him by taping the rolls, braiding them together, re-mounting the toilet paper holder vertical, etc. This one is minor, but first thing I saw when I walked in this morning. My favorite one was last week when the brand-spanking-new engineer pulled an entire roll apart into individual squares and left them perfectly stacked on the back of the toilet after removing every other roll from the bathroom.