Girls who broke your heart thread

Campari said:

Again I"m not trying to upset you or anything, like I said it just seems a little strange to me.

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Like I said, it"s an outlet for the very real (male) human need to puff your chest up about shit you"ve accomplished. IRL it would be inappropriate, in my opinion, to brag about that kind of shit. Here, like mostly everything else, it"s irrelevant. If you don"t care, you can just skip the posts or whatever. No one gets hurt.

Dabamf said:

This sounds a little like "I told you so" I guess

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Yeah well, rightfully so. I"m not complaining.

I was in a pretty good mood today though. Let"s see how long that sticks

Eomer said:

That"s cause it"s fun to brag in anonymity here, it"s an outlet for that. I"m aware of it! Otherwise IRL my shit is kept on the down low. Like I said, it"s fun to brag here, and in the long run completely meaningless since I"m about as close to anonymous here as I can be. Whether people believe me or not means about as much to me as how well I do means to them, in all likelihood.

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IMO no problem with this at all, everyone here is (or should be) mature enough to see that you"re not trying to flaunt anything...just simply mentioning it as another paradigm in your dating life.

Personally I am involved in a start up company that just "started up" making the big cash and I enjoy reading how you deal with gold digging whores. I fall in love far too quickly, and I honestly fear a gold digger tricking me into falling for her and then breaking my heart down the road. Then again, I doubt anyone would know how I stand financially until they see my bank statement.

If Eomer neglected to inform us about his financial situation I think we would not be getting the entire picture. No need to be all salty.

I don"t think anyone was being salty, it just came up is all.

As far as being tricked by a gold digger, I think that it would be pretty tough to miss the warning signs if you came across one. Again, there"s a difference between a woman who like Xerxes might place a higher priority on monetary status than the average girl, and one who has basically said to themselves "I am going to marry rich no matter what." And even with Xerxes it was pretty apparent from about the first 5 seconds when I met her what she was like when it came to money, just judging by her clothes and the way conversations went. And she"d be content marrying a guy who makes a hundred or two grand a year probably, since she makes decent coin herself. That"s nothing compared to the whores who will do anything they can to net a pro athlete or CEO or something.

And again if you"re not actively flaunting your wealth, chances are you aren"t going to be attracting that kind of woman anyways. They"re going to go after guys that are conspicuous about that kind of thing.

Hell, it"s my theory that most guys that end up with a gold digging whore knew damn well what they were getting in to, or damn well should have but were blinded by other shit (her fake tits probably).

Ravvenn said:

Mustaffi, are you single?

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That is such a short inquiry for something you have little desire of even really knowing. Guess it works out huh!

The biggest clue is this:

1) You"re self-employed
2) you own a nice place and a decent car

Women need no other clues.

Again though, this is Alberta. Any jackass with a bit of work ethic and willingness to get their hands dirty was making 6 figures or close to it the past 5 years, and they"re probably driving a 50k car or pickup to prove it, even if they bought it on financing.

I honestly don"t think owning a car that"s worth 50-60k says much about someone"s monetary status with any certainty. Yeah, the person driving it might be really well off and they bought it on cash. Or they might be making decent money and are up to their eye balls in debt.

Yeah, car and condo taken together would indicate I"m doing well, but it"s not really all that great of an indication how well.

It cuts both ways: someone making significantly less than I could well have the appearance of making several times more than me, because they like to throw it around. Something like 70-80% of my income in the past 5 years has gone towards paying down my mortgage and buying my dad out of the business, whereas most guys in their 20"s would be throwing that money around like it"s going out of style.

Eomer said:

Again though, this is Alberta. Any jackass with a bit of work ethic and willingness to get their hands dirty was making 6 figures or close to it the past 5 years, and they"re probably driving a 50k car or pickup to prove it, even if they bought it on financing.

I honestly don"t think owning a car that"s worth 50-60k says much about someone"s monetary status with any certainty. Yeah, the person driving it might be really well off and they bought it on cash. Or they might be making decent money and are up to their eye balls in debt.

Yeah, car and condo taken together would indicate I"m doing well, but it"s not really all that great of an indication how well.

It cuts both ways: someone making significantly less than I could well have the appearance of making several times more than me, because they like to throw it around. Something like 70-80% of my income in the past 5 years has gone towards paying down my mortgage and buying my dad out of the business, whereas most guys in their 20"s would be throwing that money around like it"s going out of style.

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Again though, I"m in Alberta and once again no, jackasses willing to get their hands dirty certainly don"t drive luxury cars, own their condos (in downtown), go skiing and partying every weekend and take random trips to Japan.

You are greatly underestimating the image you project.

chu said:

Again though, I"m in Alberta and once again no, jackasses willing to get their hands dirty certainly don"t drive luxury cars, own their condos (in downtown), go skiing and partying every weekend and take random trips to Japan.

You are greatly underestimating the image you project.

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I"m somewhat in the same boat as Eomer, and I have to agree. Eomer you are vastly underestimating your image.

When you say stuff like "Well driving a nice car doesn"t mean I have money...". Even if it could be true, do you honestly think women sit there and think about it like that? No, they see the nice car(etc), and jump to a conclusion, and have a pretty good chance of being right.

When you have any kind of status, you have to accept that pretty much every girl who shows any interest in you has your status as the underlying reason for their attraction. If you don"t accept it, you end up all jaded like me and simply stop dating once you can"t justify deluding yourself anymore

Maybe when I make it big, I"ll feel differently but...

What is the practical difference between a $25,000 car and a $50,000 car? Other than showing people you have a lot of money, of course.

Churchill said:

Maybe when I make it big, I"ll feel differently but...

What is the practical difference between a $25,000 car and a $50,000 car? Other than showing people you have a lot of money, of course.

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Depends on what cars your comparing, and what you value in a car. If the point you"re getting at is that it"s a "waste of money" to buy a nice car, then I"d respond that so is damn near everything most people spend money on in one way or another. Some people like nice clothes, the latest electronics, artwork, cars, motorcycles, bikes, lots of vacations, the list goes on and on. To each their own.

Darus Grey said:

When you have any kind of status,you have to accept that pretty much every girl who shows any interest in you has your status as the underlying reason for their attraction. If you don"t accept it, you end up all jaded like me and simply stop dating once you can"t justify deluding yourself anymore

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I don"t disagree that it would become fairly apparent pretty soon in any relationship. I was more talking about first impressions and attraction. Xerxes aside, the vast majority of girls I"ve met and either dated or who have shown attraction to me in the past couple years I"ve met on ski trips, where for all they know that guiding thing is my job (Chuck assumed as much), and all they know about me is that I"m fun to hang out with on a weekend in the mountains.

As far as my "status" being the underlying reason for every girl"s attraction to me past initial impressions, I"d say that"s completely false. Otherwise Chuck and/or Anne would still be around, right?

But yeah, I"m well aware that any girl I date would quickly clue in to the situation, and that any girl I get set up with by a friend would have been told as much as well. I don"t agree though, that "every girl" would find that the primary source of their attraction.

Man I"m glad I"m relatively poor (as in, not super-rich).

After they see my 4 year old Volkswagen Lupo (google for pics, you"ll get the idea) and my 1-room-apartment, I can be pretty sure they are not after my money

Eomer said:

Depends on what cars your comparing, and what you value in a car. If the point you"re getting at is that it"s a "waste of money" to buy a nice car, then I"d respond that so is damn near everything most people spend money on in one way or another. Some people like nice clothes, the latest electronics, artwork, cars, motorcycles, bikes, lots of vacations, the list goes on and on. To each their own.

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So rather than speaking in broad terms...what do YOU get out of a $50,000 car that you couldn"t get out of a $25,000 car? Does it have better fuel efficiency? Is it more environmentally friendly? Can it go faster? Does it have a bigger trunk? Does it have an apple logo on the side?

As far as my "status" being the underlying reason for every girl"s attraction to me past initial impressions, I"d say that"s completely false. Otherwise Chuck and/or Anne would still be around, right?

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"Every girl" is a generalization with the best of them, it"s not an absolute. The problem is of course when you start thinking every girl you date or like is the exception rather than the rule.

I should clarify that I"m not strictly speaking of *initial* attraction. People will have flings for any kind of arbitrary reason with anyone they take a fancy too at a given point in time.

I don"t know Chuck or Anne outside the view you"ve presented of them, so I can"t comment of what they would or would not have done, but let"s say you did an experiment, where you took some of your money, bought a decent used car(like a civic, focus, or whatever car is common), rented a very modest apartment with modest amenities, and told these same girls you worked some modest or even menial job, and didn"t take them out to the same more upper-level establishments you do now for drinks or dinner.

I"d bet any amount of money in the world that you"d notice a very consistent trend of your relationships not lasting as long as they do now(or not even off the ground after the initial fling stage). Status is a prime instrument in female attraction(and historically is the reason males strive for status, to have a larger pool of better mates).

It"s pretty much the most important factor, as is easily visible. As to why they don"t stick around? Well there"s an obvious conclusion that I"ll avoid saying as it"s not remotely flattering and I"m generally non-confrontational .

But really, don"t under-estimate the huge role your status as a well off young man has in your dating life.

Churchill said:

So rather than speaking in broad terms...what do YOU get out of a $50,000 car that you couldn"t get out of a $25,000 car? Does it have better fuel efficiency? Is it more environmentally friendly? Can it go faster? Does it have a bigger trunk? Does it have an apple logo on the side?

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Amazon.com: The Theory of the Leisure Class: An Economic Study of Institutions (Great Minds Series): Thorstein Veblen: Books

your answer is there.

There"s a huge difference in every department between a $25,000 car and a $50,000 car. They are practically incomparable. The cars I"ve owned in my life have ranged from $1500 (VW Polo "Parade") to $65000 (Audi RS4) - progressively increasing in cost with my age, as is to be expected with most people.

Churchill said:

So rather than speaking in broad terms...what do YOU get out of a $50,000 car that you couldn"t get out of a $25,000 car? Does it have better fuel efficiency? Is it more environmentally friendly? Can it go faster? Does it have a bigger trunk? Does it have an apple logo on the side?

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It"s a very powerful car, so yes it"s fast in terms of acceleration. The 3-series is also well known has having some of the best handling/steering of any car that isn"t an out and out sports car. So it"s fun to drive. Fuel efficiency wise it"s not great, but pretty decent for a car with 400hp (about 19mpg in the city, 26 on the highway). It"s AWD, and I have a spare set of winter tires, so it"s excellent for winter driving despite being a powerful car. It"s got a very nice interior, although BMW"s are not particularly competitive in terms of interiors when compared to Audi or Mercedes, they"re fairly spartan. The USB audio integration was nice, allowing me to load a flash drive with MP3"s, plug it in to the car, and choose music from the dash.

I dunno, there"s a long list of stuff I could give for why I purchased my car over say, a Malibu or Accord or something. But in the end, it"ll come down to personal opinion. In terms of the base purpose of a car, getting yourself from point A to point B, no one "needs" anything more than Geo Metro unless they have a family or use the vehicle for work.

What point are you getting at? Or are you just genuinely curious? I think it"s stupid or silly to spend 200 million on a 420" yacht, but I don"t need Paul Allen to give me an itemized list of it"s benefits to understand why someone might purchase such a thing if they have the means to.

Darus Grey said:

The problem is of course when you start thinking every girl you date or like is the exception rather than the rule.

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Yeah, fallen in to that trap a couple times in the past little while .

It"s pretty much the most important factor, as is easily visible. As to why they don"t stick around? Well there"s an obvious conclusion that I"ll avoid saying as it"s not remotely flattering and I"m generally non-confrontational .

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Go ahead, I would think given my posting history here it"s obvious I don"t take much personally.