Girls who broke your heart thread

Louis · Aug 9, 2009

Dabamf said:
Magic Bullets by Savoy - Focuses on canned material and unnatural game. But you can learn a *lot* of fantastic concepts in this. You may not want to lie and say "I have to get back to my friends in a second, but....." when you approach a girl, but to learn WHY that works, even if you never use that particular concept, increases your overall understanding of women (and people in general, too). This is a must-read and I credit most of what I know to it.

The Attraction Forums - Free Pickup and Dating Adviceand read the "Classic Writings" section. All of them. Unfortunately, the entire community has changed from a great place where people share knowledge to a cesspool of self-promotion, but the material is still there.

These 2 are a great start.

Bad Boy Lifestyle by "Bad boy" - Focuses on being a manly man and natural game. This guy is always direct and hates indirect approaches. This is good to get a different perspective, but you don"t end up learning a lot of consciously-applicable stuff.

I read "The Venusian Arts Handbook" by Mystery but Magic Bullets kinda takes what he wrote and builds on it. The Game is of course what started it all, but I"ve never read it and assumed the more recent writings are better honed.

I haven"t followed the community for well over a year so there may be better reads available than what I recommend, but Magic Bullets and reading the classic writings section of that forum are gonna give you an enormous amount of understanding. And that"s really why it"s good: understanding. I don"t ask girls who they think lies more men or women, but I understand why they advocate an approach like that and in turn apply that same concept in my own way.

By the way, the books these guys sell are absurdly expensive. And the guys all completely sold out, litter their posts with self-promotion and are shitty and sell your email address and send unstoppable spam, so I am happy to advocate to just pirate all their books. The most popular ones you can easily find on big torrent trackers.

Lots of interesting posts on that website.

I believe FoHSS has actually improved my game with girls as scary as that sounds.

Sutekh · Aug 9, 2009

Not scary, Pathetic.

Loki_foh · Aug 9, 2009

Just need to vent here:
I"ll start from the beginning. I was in a couple of classes with this girl last fall, always wanted to get something going with her, but found out she had a boyfriend, so i just decided to become friends. So that went on for a couple months, talked all the time, got along great together.

Fast forward to around new years last year, and she tells me she broke up with her boyfriend. Great news for me, so i console her and continue to be a good friend until the spring semester starts. At this point, i make my move and things take off. Start dating, everything is going great. Towards the end of the semester, she tells me she"s applying for an internship position in california (we"re in austin, tx). Being a good boyfriend, i support her when she gets it, and we make plans to see each other over the summer.

Talk every day for hours, until one day i dont her from her. Next day she calls me up and says "we need to talk." I knew something was up at this point. She goes on to tell me she made out with some dude the previous day at some party, and thinks that because she did this, she doesn"t really care about me and breaks off our relationship. This was 2 weeks before i was supposed to fly out there for a week trip.

I was completely taken aback, no warning, just decided to end our 6 month relationship for some stranger she"ll never see again come august 18th or something. Now my question is: If I really like this girl, should i bother pursuing the relationship? Her breaking it off like that has just made me so bitter that I"m having trouble recalling the feelings I have(had) for her.

Any advice/comments appreciated.

Big Phoenix · Aug 9, 2009

Whats the point to try and continue pursuing her when you already know what she thinks of your relationship? She knew you where coming out there and this was going to be a big thing yet she does that.

Sutekh · Aug 9, 2009

Why even ask that question? She cheated on you when she was away, she"s a slut. if you want to have a relation with trust that you can actually enjoy, you"ll find someone else.

Dabamf_sl · Aug 9, 2009

Eomer said:
And that was about it. No idea if there was any ulterior motive to her texting, or if she was just having random thoughts (she"d often ask fairly off the wall questions out of nowhere) and was bored hanging out with her family at the festival. She didn"t come by after, and I didn"t expect her to.

Not everything means something. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, as Freud says. Ever have something trigger a thought about someone and sent them a random message for no particular reason? I do it all the time and it means nothing except that something amused me and I wanted to share it. There is a point where you can overthink things.

9:07 - Me: Sorry, Dan stole my phone! I replaced the guts of my toilets cause they didn"t flush right! After party at my place tonight.

The party invite is completely out of place and confuses me. Were you gonna invite her if she hadn"t texted you? If not, it doesn"t belong. If so, the context in which you sent it screams "I"m hoping you are talking to me because you"re interested again, so here"s an immediate invite to hang out." And it seems like you tried to make the invite subtle, mentioning it in as few words as possible and not actually inviting her, just sorta fishing for a response. If you have a desire, express it. Saying "I"m having an after party, you"re welcome to come" at least shows the balls to commit to a request. Mentioning its existence in as few words as possible just makes it look like you want her to come but are afraid to ask. Yea, I just said "don"t overthink things" but I"m just speculating what I think is going on in your head and how it shows without you knowing.

Randomly related, on those forums Savoy has a post about "How to get back your ex-girlfriend." I"d read it, not to learn how to get her back, but to understand why anything but disappearing completely for a while will never make her come around again.

And Loki, she broke up with you, there is no "pursuing the relationship." The reason she gave doesn"t make any sense, but that only means she probably has a different reason. But whatever it was it was obviously sufficient to want to break up with you over, which means its over.

Eomer · Aug 10, 2009

Dabamf said:
The party invite is completely out of place and confuses me.

Heh, fair enough. I had been drinking for about 8 hours in the hot sun at that point, it"s amazing I could write anything coherent. Thanks again for the interpretation. I don"t really need any interpretation to the texts I"ll post below, just adding them to continue the narative or something.

So yesterday, again after having consumed far too much cider and beer in the hot sun, I was laying on the hill watching Stephen Paige, smoking a joint with my friends and I just felt so damn good about everything (this festival is like the 4 best days of the year, friends come in from out of town, you see dozens of regulars from years past etc etc). And that made me miss her (or maybe just someone in general), so I decided I would send my first drunk text knowing there wasn"t much point or possible good outcome.

11:10 - Me: This is officially my first and only drunk text: This would have been so much better with each other

11:22 - Her: Mine was last night, and I asked about toilets! I am such a loser! (ouch)

11:26 - Her: I did see you a few times, but didn"t want to say hi because I didn"t know if you would"ve been ok with that.

11:28 - Me: Ditto, I figured as much, about the same here The power of sunglasses!

11:29 - Her: Haha! What would we do with out them? Hope you had a great time regardless. Thanks again for the ticket.

GrobbeeTrull2.0_foh · Aug 10, 2009

Jesus Christ.

Whyme_foh · Aug 10, 2009

Talk every day for hours, until one day i dont her from her. Next day she calls me up and says "we need to talk." I knew something was up at this point. She goes on to tell me she made out with some dude the previous day at some party, and thinks that because she did this, she doesn"t really care about me and breaks off our relationship. This was 2 weeks before i was supposed to fly out there for a week trip.

I was completely taken aback, no warning, just decided to end our 6 month relationship for some stranger she"ll never see again come august 18th or something. Now my question is: If I really like this girl, should i bother pursuing the relationship? Her breaking it off like that has just made me so bitter that I"m having trouble recalling the feelings I have(had) for her.

It"s easy to only consider the dirty act itself as the main problem, but in reality the problems began way before that. Consider the progression: girls moves away to another city and is in a LDR with you. She begins to make friends, meet new people, and slowly begins to regret being in a relationship due to the fact that there are all of these attractive guys around her that she can"t do anything with. She"s lonely, wants some physical companionship but also wants to remain true to you. This causes a conflict in her mind which slowly begins to transform into trickles of regret. That trickle eventually turns into a deluge of contempt towards you and herself. Having no outlet for that contempt it just builds and builds, and eventually her mindset goes from "I can"t do this, I"m in a relationship" to "I don"t want to be in a relationship, why shouldn"t I do what I want?". That (possibly coupled with alcohol) is what lead to her making out with that dude.

I guess the lessons here are 1) anyone and everyone can cheat because cheating is not a function of personal morals, it"s a function of the inherent dynamics of a relationship. 2) LDR"s don"t work.

Don"t beat yourself up about it - just move on. Whatever you do don"t try and pursue her or get back together with her. Not because she"s a "slut" or "whore", but because those feelings of hers arose for a reason, and they will keep on arising and you will keep on getting hurt. There are exceptions to this but not many. Good luck.

Ronaan · Aug 10, 2009

Of all the people who could possibly remember my birthday, only family and nailstudio_girl sent birthday greetings. Funny how I mentioned a while ago that she stopped responding to texts, turns out she had no phone for over a week...

Anyway, it"s my fucking birthday, and it"s another one that"s going to end without getting at least a BJ.

On the plus side, that girl from town festival seems really interested in me. Going to call her Annie fwiw. Stopped by at her place yesterday night for a beer and some smalltalk, and a bit after midnight I got a birthday kiss (well a couple dozen actually), so not all of today sucks.
If only she had 10-15 lbs less on her. She"s a really nice person, great character, great face, ... but we"re both not sure where this will be going.

GrobbeeTrull2.0_foh · Aug 10, 2009

If only she had 10-15 lbs less on her.

Woah, woah, woah. Hold the fucking phone. REALLY? You, of all people, are going to complain about someone"s weight? And on top of that, 10-15 lbs? SERIOUSLY?

What the fuck. You can"t remember back before you slimmed down to what it was like, to be judged solely on how much you weighed? And knowing that, you"re going to consciencously do this to someone else? No wonder you fail so often.

Ronaan · Aug 10, 2009

GrobbeeTrull2.0 said:
Woah, woah, woah. Hold the fucking phone. REALLY? You, of all people, are going to complain about someone"s weight? And on top of that, 10-15 lbs? SERIOUSLY?

What the fuck. You can"t remember back before you slimmed down to what it was like, to be judged solely on how much you weighed? And knowing that, you"re going to consciencously do this to someone else? No wonder you fail so often.

That"s not what I meant to say. Well maybe it"s 20 lbs. Whatever. Yeah I didn"t forget where I come from. I also said she has a great personality. I"m looking past her weight too, just mentioning it. So far it"s the only thing "negative" about her, and if it remains that way I can perfectly live with that.
We had breakfast together today (in town) and it was very enjoyable.
Bottom line, I like her enough as a person to look past a few lbs.

Something has to be wrong though, she"s 33, single, my friend through whom I know her said he never saw her with a boyfriend. She seems to be very normal in the head so far though.

I still don"t know where we will be going though, I was hoping to find someone with similar interests (climbing, motorbiking, gaming ... one of 3 would be enough). No dice though.

GrobbeeTrull2.0_foh · Aug 10, 2009

Something has to be wrong though, he"s 33, single, my friend through whom I know him said he never saw him with a girlfriend. He seems to be very normal in the head so far though.

Probably what she"s thinking about you. Go for it.

Ronaan · Aug 10, 2009

GrobbeeTrull2.0 said:
Probably what she"s thinking about you. Go for it.

Yeah, might be. But then I"m 36, divorced, and my friend through whom she knows me has seen me with girlfriends... and I don"t really come across as normal in the head either

Yeah, we"ll hang out, not expecting too much out of it, and see where it leads. Those are basically her words of last night. She said it"s possible that one of us finds out after a few weeks that it"s not what we"re looking for.
Guess that means she won"t be standing below the balcony like that other loony did, if we end things. Big plus in my book

Vim_foh · Aug 10, 2009

If anyone cares to know.

I never went to the birthday party and never gave her the gift. The day after her birthday, which I was told was really crappy. I went trekking with one of her friends, which has the hots for me. wOOt wOOt.

Loki_foh · Aug 10, 2009

Whyme said:
It"s easy to only consider the dirty act itself as the main problem, but in reality the problems began way before that. Consider the progression: girls moves away to another city and is in a LDR with you. She begins to make friends, meet new people, and slowly begins to regret being in a relationship due to the fact that there are all of these attractive guys around her that she can"t do anything with. She"s lonely, wants some physical companionship but also wants to remain true to you. This causes a conflict in her mind which slowly begins to transform into trickles of regret. That trickle eventually turns into a deluge of contempt towards you and herself. Having no outlet for that contempt it just builds and builds, and eventually her mindset goes from "I can"t do this, I"m in a relationship" to "I don"t want to be in a relationship, why shouldn"t I do what I want?". That (possibly coupled with alcohol) is what lead to her making out with that dude.

I guess the lessons here are 1) anyone and everyone can cheat because cheating is not a function of personal morals, it"s a function of the inherent dynamics of a relationship. 2) LDR"s don"t work.

Don"t beat yourself up about it - just move on. Whatever you do don"t try and pursue her or get back together with her. Not because she"s a "slut" or "whore", but because those feelings of hers arose for a reason, and they will keep on arising and you will keep on getting hurt. There are exceptions to this but not many. Good luck.

Good advice.

Thanks

Dabamf_sl · Aug 10, 2009

whyme is a smart man

and...

Vim said:
If anyone cares to know.

I never went to the birthday party and never gave her the gift. The day after her birthday, which I was told was really crappy. I went trekking with one of her friends, which has the hots for me. wOOt wOOt.

good job being smart and upholding your dignity

And who cares what Ronaan used to weigh? If he is a tubby now and complaining about the girl being a little overweight, yea that wouldn"t make sense. But he"s in good shape now, meaning he can be more selective about a mate"s physical appearance. I for one will never date or get involved with a girl who isn"t in shape. I used to be preposterously skinny, but I"m not now. Does that mean I"m not allowed to say anything about a girl being too skinny? No. It is reasonable to desire someone who is equally attractive to yourself, regardless of what you used to look like. What you used to look like is irrelevant, unless your relationships somehow involve time travel.

guanna_foh · Aug 11, 2009

i just say to my wife, "Wanna bone?"

If she responds with,"YEAH", we go play.

Usually I get, "I"m tired, go jerk off."

Married life is awesome, its either all the sex she can handle, or all the free jerk off sessions you can handle.

I have found, however, if you change out burnt out light bulbs, tighten loose screws, and wash some laundry (you MUST fold it and put it away also) in the same day, your chances go WAY up.

Leaving the toilet seat up cancels out all of the above, get trained, keep it fucking down. (if she sits on the seat while its up in the middle of the night, DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES LAUGH. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT MARRIAGE ADVICE YOU WILL EVER KNOW) This is a personal safety tip.

Rangoth · Aug 11, 2009

guanna said:
i just say to my wife, "Wanna bone?"

If she responds with,"YEAH", we go play.

Usually I get, "I"m tired, go jerk off."

Married life is awesome, its either all the sex she can handle, or all the free jerk off sessions you can handle.

I have found, however, if you change out burnt out light bulbs, tighten loose screws, and wash some laundry (you MUST fold it and put it away also) in the same day, your chances go WAY up.

Leaving the toilet seat up cancels out all of the above, get trained, keep it fucking down. (if she sits on the seat while its up in the middle of the night, DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES LAUGH. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT MARRIAGE ADVICE YOU WILL EVER KNOW) This is a personal safety tip.

That sounds like the worst possible way to live that I could ever imagine.

EDIT: No disrespect meant, but I would never get married.

Vim_foh · Aug 11, 2009

guanna said:
(if she sits on the seat while its up in the middle of the night, DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES LAUGH. THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT MARRIAGE ADVICE YOU WILL EVER KNOW) This is a personal safety tip.

LOL, that would take me awhile, for me not to laugh that is...

Girls who broke your heart thread

Trakanon Raider

Blackwing Lair Raider

shitlord

Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer

Blackwing Lair Raider

shitlord

Trakanon Raider

shitlord

shitlord

Molten Core Raider

shitlord

Molten Core Raider

shitlord

Molten Core Raider

shitlord

shitlord

shitlord

shitlord

Blackwing Lair Raider

shitlord