Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Hatorade

Hatorade

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When my wife is hungry and/or low blood sugar she seethes hate for all things out of all her very being. It is palpable in the air and holy shit if we are in the car on the way to eat I feel like a hostage. Don't talk, no music, just drive in silence or potential suffer her wrath.

After she eats she is amazing and we have a great time as usual. She knows this and says she hates that about herself. I don't take it personally but after all these years it is starting to weigh heavy on me and I am pretty sure my daughter as well.

I am fairly certain she can't change since it is biological but I might be wrong. I thought about just saying fuck this deal with your shit on your own and essentially stop caring when she is being crazy, but that seems like a slippery slope that ends in divorce.

I tried the keep snacks close at hand but she doesn't like snacks on the whole and especially before she eats.

When she stops being a crazy person she apologizes, says things like one day you are going to leave me because of stuff like this. I immediately deny it but after 10 or so years of her apologizing my inner monologue is starting to agree with her.

I love her more than anything but I am getting tired FoH. Any ideas what I can do?

Oh and as shitty as this sounds her TMJ and 100% drop off on the blowjob front is likely fucking with my perspective. She use to apologize with amazing head, and there is nothing to replace that loss.
 
Hatorade

Hatorade

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Noodleface said:
Is she diabetic?
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No, only health issue(though a major one) is rheumatoid arthritis that she manages with weekly injections to keep her inflammation down. To be clear with the injections she is able to mostly function normally to include fun stuff like mountain biking and equally rigorous things.
 
Hoss

Hoss

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Haast said:
They were probably saying Quiero Taco Bell. Mostly because I think you'd fuck chihuahuas.

Goddamn, I'm salty today. Oh wait. ¡Dios mio! Soy muy salado hoy.
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Nope, but side note: My mom has a chihuahua that sucks his own dick. To completion. If you play fetch with him, he'll fetch 2 or 3 times, then lay down and suck himself off. I, and everyone else who has seen it finds it disgusting and hilarious. I bet tiggle's girl would get aroused by it.

Hatorade said:
I tried the keep snacks close at hand but she doesn't like snacks on the whole and especially before she eats.
Click to expand...

If it's really blood sugar, keep glucose tablets handy instead of snacks. You can find them in any pharmacy next to the diabetic testing supplies.
 
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Noodleface

Noodleface

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My wife gets hangry too, but not to the extent of what is listed above.

I'm diabetic and if I get low I can get pretty snappy.
 
Cad

Cad

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Hatorade said:
When my wife is hungry and/or low blood sugar she seethes hate for all things out of all her very being. It is palpable in the air and holy shit if we are in the car on the way to eat I feel like a hostage. Don't talk, no music, just drive in silence or potential suffer her wrath.

After she eats she is amazing and we have a great time as usual. She knows this and says she hates that about herself. I don't take it personally but after all these years it is starting to weigh heavy on me and I am pretty sure my daughter as well.

I am fairly certain she can't change since it is biological but I might be wrong. I thought about just saying fuck this deal with your shit on your own and essentially stop caring when she is being crazy, but that seems like a slippery slope that ends in divorce.

I tried the keep snacks close at hand but she doesn't like snacks on the whole and especially before she eats.

When she stops being a crazy person she apologizes, says things like one day you are going to leave me because of stuff like this. I immediately deny it but after 10 or so years of her apologizing my inner monologue is starting to agree with her.

I love her more than anything but I am getting tired FoH. Any ideas what I can do?

Oh and as shitty as this sounds her TMJ and 100% drop off on the blowjob front is likely fucking with my perspective. She use to apologize with amazing head, and there is nothing to replace that loss.
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So, just because it's biological or has some psychological cause doesn't mean you have to or should put up with it.

Any number of mental disorders will cause someone to act like a fucking crazy person, and whether its their fault or not it doesn't mean that they are a suitable partner for you. You need to be with someone that is a fulfilling, caring partner for you and if you feel belittled or walking on eggshells rather than feel like it's a productive partnership, it might be time to be looking for the back door. Kids? Financial entanglements?
 
Tarrant

Tarrant

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RA is no joke and it can effect a lot of things people don't realize, I wonder if that's somehow involved?

To what extent is she getting angry? Like what happens exactly? Must be pretty bad to consider or have thoughts of divorce. In your limited description she sounds like my ex wife...only that's how she was all the time. God help you if you turned the AC on in the car as well....even if it was 90 degrees outside.
 
Hatorade

Hatorade

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Anger is the wrong word for what happens. It is more like anything done or said is wrong, so we say nothing. Best example I can compare it to is awkward silence turned up to 11.

Another example is couple months back she was straight up cruel to our daughter at disney we all ordered drinks, hot coco for daughter and we both got coffee, only she didn't tell them decafe and we realized this long after walking away from the stand and my wife just threw away the coffee.

I forget what my daughter said exactly but it was with good intentions to share her coco and my wife lashed out with extreme malice and said something like you have a drink and I didn't get one how do you think I feel? I was stunned, she knew immediately she was being insane and had to walk away while my ten year old daughter cried in confusion. This is the one and only time it got that bad but I know she continues to feel like above she is just better at controlling it via silence.

I have no fear of her it just kills all good moods and happiness, and I am generally in a good mood, easy going, and I like it that way.

Not looking for an exit strategy, but I wonder if I should push for external help.
 
Tarrant

Tarrant

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I think, if you'll read back on your posts that you see already the need for external help. I mean, who wants to go out with someone who the whole time you have to run the risk of that happening? Not saying to leave her behind and move on with your life, but that's a big deal for sure. Plus you don't want your daughter growing up and thinking that it's an acceptable way to act towards other people.

I mean, all you can do is suggest she sees someone for her sever mood swings when shes hungry and see if theres an imbalance chemically or what not that's triggering. There's hangry and then theres this and this seems to go beyond a simple case of being hangry.
 
Cad

Cad

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Tarrant said:
I think, if you'll read back on your posts that you see already the need for external help. I mean, who wants to go out with someone who the whole time you have to run the risk of that happening? Not saying to leave her behind and move on with your life, but that's a big deal for sure. Plus you don't want your daughter growing up and thinking that it's an acceptable way to act towards other people.

I mean, all you can do is suggest she sees someone for her sever mood swings when shes hungry and see if theres an imbalance chemically or what not that's triggering. There's hangry and then theres this and this seems to go beyond a simple case of being hangry.
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Hatorade Hatorade I agree with Tarrant, what you're describing isn't just being pissy, it's pathological. External help isn't a bad idea.

Getting her to accept external help... that might be something different.
 
Hatorade

Hatorade

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Thanks all, to be fair to her this is her only flaw(aside from squeezing the top of the tooth paste). Sadly it is effecting everything, I will approach her about this when things are going good so I don't come at her with anything beyond calm and loving.
 
Tarrant

Tarrant

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Yeah, getting her to want to get help for it is a whole different thing. I mean shes acknowledged it's an issue so that's part of it, but is she simply saying that to placate you into accepting the behavior and her getting a pass(likes shes done for years it seems) or does she realize just how bad it is and would be willing to look more into it?

Either way, good luck man.
 
Soygen

Soygen

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That's a tough one. Her being a dick to the kid would definitely push me to give her an ultimatum on that kind of behavior, were she my wife. Good luck!
 
Hoss

Hoss

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How often does it happen? Maybe you just need to stuff a midol into some peanut butter once in a while. Proper husbanding demands you keep track of stuff like that. Oh and you need to keep track of her orgasms too. See if you notice her getting worse when it's been a while since you laid any pipe. My wife gets the hysterics when it's been too long. Don't believe any bullshit you hear about women being sex camels who can go for decades with no problems. There are problems.

We recently had to go 6 weeks without sex while my wife recovered from surgery. At the end, she called a fancy steak house to complain that they threw away a piece of gristle she complained about when they boxed up the leftovers. I mean, she was explicit that they shouldn't throw any of it away, but it's another level when you're willing to call the manager from home to complain about it. She had a good orgasm last night and she's doing better now. Normally I try to practice preventive husbanding at the first sign of irrationality, but in this case we had to wait till the dr cleared her.
 
Hatorade

Hatorade

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Sex is minimum once a week, never had bedroom issues aside from never enough on my end.

It is almost a daily occurrence, somedays it is very minor and brief but it is there.
 
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