Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Gravy

Gravy

Bronze Squire
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454
I ruined my chances at anal about a week or two before we got married.

We were getting our grove on in a missionary, her legs on my shoulders thing, and we were both greased up all over. Well, I misjudged how long/short my dick was and pulled out a bit too far, and when I jammed Mr. Willy back home, he had dropped down a notch.

No warning, no lube, and straight up the poop chute to the hilt. That's when I realized my gal could fly.
 
Falstaff

Falstaff

Ahn'Qiraj Raider
8,400
3,333
Xarpolis_sl said:
sensitive artist.
But it's also "DVD" as David and "ASA" as... you guess it. Asa.

The Podcast is David Choe (The guy that painted the Facebook building for stock shares in the company. Then 10 years later, was worth $500,000,000 because of those shares.) And Asa Akira is the #1 porn star right now. She's constantly voted as the best. A japanese chick.
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ah yes I didn't read your post carefully enough.
 
iannis

iannis

Musty Nester
31,351
17,656
She really must just be a joy to work with though. Those awards they give, I don't know about the biz or anything like that, I always just assume it's like a "these are the coolest whores you'll ever wanna fuck" award.

As weird as it is, it mostly is just a job for those people. Maybe she's just really nice.
 
iannis

iannis

Musty Nester
31,351
17,656
She really must just be a joy to work with though. Those awards they give, I don't know about the biz or anything like that, I always just assume it's like a "these are the coolest whores you'll ever wanna fuck" award.

As weird as it is, it mostly is just a job for those people. Maybe she's just really nice.
 
Neki

Neki

Molten Core Raider
2,726
397
Xarpolis_sl said:
Asa Akira is the #1 porn star right now. She's constantly voted as the best. A japanese chick.
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Wtf? Didn't know who she was so just google image searched her and she looks horrible. Vast majority of japanese AV models look a million times better than her.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,274
15,097
Neki_sl said:
Wtf? Didn't know who she was so just google image searched her and she looks horrible. Vast majority of japanese AV models look a million times better than her.
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Yeah she is nothing good.

Give me Ashlynn Brooke or Madison Ivy any day.
 
Xarpolis

Xarpolis

Life's a Dream
14,645
16,330
I don't think she's very attractive either. But she consistently wins awards for best anal, best vaginal & best blowjob scenes. I only know this because they talk about it on the podcast. I don't even think I've seen any of her "work".
 
Xarpolis

Xarpolis

Life's a Dream
14,645
16,330
She's pretty funny though. She says some great shit on twitter, if that's what you're into. She's filthy.
 
Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
20,338
14,001
Yogurt you say? Now that's something you can use to get your woman in the mood

 
Oldbased

Oldbased

> Than U
28,426
67,393
Neki_sl said:
I feel like we are being inconsiderate to Olebass with all this sex talk
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Not at all. It isn't like I was help prisoner from sex all my life. I slept with around 28 women before I met her while in HS and college and obviously my life does not revolve around sex alone. It would be damn nice to have some now and then though.
I will say it was a bigger issue to me 7 years ago than it is now, even though I had the BJ's up until 2 years fairly often. Not sure If age or just been too busy.
I was looking around some of the dating sites last night. Goddamn I can smell crazy from the pictures of some of those women.

Think I'm going to hit up this blonde at Lowe's who has been flirting the past year. She isn't bad at all, and skinny, but she looks 40's. That or she worked in a microwave prior to that job, but still is a 6 and at least laughs.
 
Gravy

Gravy

Bronze Squire
4,918
454
Olebass_sl said:
and at least laughs.
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I've been married 24 years now, and the sound of my wife's laughter makes me happier every time I hear it. Even better if I'm the one who made her laugh.

For us, humor has gotten us through some seriously hellish periods in our life, and continue to.
 
Neki

Neki

Molten Core Raider
2,726
397
Olebass_sl said:
I was looking around some of the dating sites last night. Goddamn I can smell crazy from the pictures of some of those women.
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Can't be more crazy than the one living under your roof now.

Post a pic of her? I am curious on how cray she looks.
 
Joeboo

Joeboo

Molten Core Raider
8,157
140
Neki_sl said:
Post a pic of her? I am curious on how cray she looks.
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Speaking of pics, anyone ever have any luck talking your wife into letting you take some quality pics of her in the bedroom? I joke about it with my wife and she laughs, but the couple of times I've seriously asked she's shot the idea down immediately. Even when we were dating, she was never the type to text dirty stuff or anything, she's pretty reserved when it comes to the subject of sex, unless it's during the act, but she's uncomfortable talking about the subject anywhere outside of the bedroom.
 
Lenas

Lenas

Trump's Staff
7,559
2,299
Haven't convinced my wife to take one damn picture since before we were married. Guess she just figures I can see her naked whenever now. Not the same though!
 
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