Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Phazael

Confirmed Beta Shitlord, Fat Bastard
<Aristocrat╭ರ_•́>
14,664
31,522
Having kids early is a mistake, especially if its the wife who is pressuring for it. This is code for "I want to stay home and watch TV while ignoring the kid all day for the next 18 years." basically. If money is tight without the kid, WAIT. Plus, once you shit out the fuck trophy, her family will treat it like a golden ticket to drop in any time they feel like it, because grandkids. Basically, wait and sort other shit first, ESPECIALLY finances.
 

mkopec

<Gold Donor>
26,235
39,956
We waited a couple of years. did a lot of partying and traveling, vacations...etc... It was great. If I could take it all back I would wait a couple of more years. Not that kids are bad or whatever, its that life drastically changes from fun to work.
 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,275
15,106
Having kids early is a mistake, especially if its the wife who is pressuring for it. This is code for "I want to stay home and watch TV while ignoring the kid all day for the next 18 years." basically. If money is tight without the kid, WAIT. Plus, once you shit out the fuck trophy, her family will treat it like a golden ticket to drop in any time they feel like it, because grandkids. Basically, wait and sort other shit first, ESPECIALLY finances.
We've been together for 6 years, been planning on kids within the first 1-2 years for awhile now.

We have the house, the yard, there's a school 1 minute away. We're ready.

Unfortunately, something not good is going on. She won't admit it, but I know for sure something is not right.
 

Phazael

Confirmed Beta Shitlord, Fat Bastard
<Aristocrat╭ರ_•́>
14,664
31,522
That sounds bad Noodlebro. Real bad.
Yeah in my personal experience, any girl who gets married young and then wants kids right away is doing both to cover up for something or (worse) just trying to fit some fucked up expectation that got pounded into her by her upbringing. Having kids to try and cover up other issues is the express lane to hell, sir. I've said this before, but without knowing you better my gut tells me that you are in some serious shit here. I would not get tied down anymore until you work some of this pending shit out.
 

alavaz

Trakanon Raider
2,003
714
Yes the cross most teachers put themselves on annoys me as well. For only working 9 months a year and getting a fuckton of holiday time off they get compensated fairly well. And if you're a really good teacher you can teach in a yuppie school district and make around 80k per year. I looked up the salary of some of my high school teachers recently and a few were actually just north of 100k. Not even including the fact you don't have to pay into all the government bullshit programs everyone else has to pay into. But it seems this cycle where everyone agrees teachers are so underpaid and it just continues and continues.
It's not as nice as you make it sound. They get the same holidays as any other government worker and while they technically get the summer off in the sense that they aren't in the classroom, they still have administrative work plus prep for the next year that they have to do. They don't pay into SS because they get a large amount of their checks deducted for their pensions (which is mandatory in most states). Some states they do pay into SS and get smaller pensions. They still pay medicare.

Secondly, jobs in yuppie school districts aren't just being passed out like candy along with 80k salaries. The starting salary for any teacher straight out of college (if they are lucky enough to get full time employment) will probably be pretty low in comparison to cost of living for the area. I also seriously doubt that yuppie schools have much turnover. Most of the jobs are in shitty districts where you have like 40 straight outta Compton kids packed into a classroom who's parents are probably more unruly than their children. The state & federal education funds are also constantly being fucked with, so they go long stretches without cost of living raises and market adjustments. Top it all off with the fact that you have to have at the very least a Bachelor's degree and a state license, and lets face it, unless you are willing to work in Compton you'll have to have a Masters, so you are guaranteed to have a nice student loan payment to go along with your low starting salary.

So yeah, they may not be under paid in a numbers to numbers comparison, but their bullshit to salary ratio is a lot higher than a lot of other jobs they could get that paid the same amount of money.
 

Soygen

The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
<Nazi Janitors>
28,433
44,761
Yeah in my personal experience, any girl who gets married young and then wants kids right away is doing both to cover up for something or (worse) just trying to fit some fucked up expectation that got pounded into her by her upbringing. Having kids to try and cover up other issues is the express lane to hell, sir. I've said this before, but without knowing you better my gut tells me that you are in some serious shit here. I would not get tied down anymore until you work some of this pending shit out.
Out of curiosity how many girls have you been with who wanted babies young and the you also psychoanalyzed them to divulge those results? Your anecdotal evidence is retarded. Wanting kids at a young age really isn't indicative of some evil plot or twisted expectation. Plenty of people have kids young who both want them and live normal lives. Don't mix up your experience with idiots as being the norm.
 

Khane

Got something right about marriage
20,342
14,006
It's not as nice as you make it sound. They get the same holidays as any other government worker and while they technically get the summer off in the sense that they aren't in the classroom, they still have administrative work plus prep for the next year that they have to do. They don't pay into SS because they get a large amount of their checks deducted for their pensions (which is mandatory in most states). Some states they do pay into SS and get smaller pensions. They still pay medicare.

Secondly, jobs in yuppie school districts aren't just being passed out like candy along with 80k salaries. The starting salary for any teacher straight out of college (if they are lucky enough to get full time employment) will probably be pretty low in comparison to cost of living for the area. I also seriously doubt that yuppie schools have much turnover. Most of the jobs are in shitty districts where you have like 40 straight outta Compton kids packed into a classroom who's parents are probably more unruly than their children. The state & federal education funds are also constantly being fucked with, so they go long stretches without cost of living raises and market adjustments. Top it all off with the fact that you have to have at the very least a Bachelor's degree and a state license, and lets face it, unless you are willing to work in Compton you'll have to have a Masters, so you are guaranteed to have a nice student loan payment to go along with your low starting salary.

So yeah, they may not be under paid in a numbers to numbers comparison, but their bullshit to salary ratio is a lot higher than a lot of other jobs they could get that paid the same amount of money.
A lot of what you're saying is true, however let's not pretend they need to make lesson plans for the year EVERY summer all summer. They only need to do that administrative work once and only for each time a curriculum changes. Every teacher I dated either worked some other menial job in the summer or did exactly jack and shit for the entire three months.
 

iannis

Musty Nester
31,351
17,656
Don't wait too long. Yeah, you can have children into your 40's these days. That doesn't mean you should.

Honestly by 35 it's too late.
 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,275
15,106
Yeah in my personal experience, any girl who gets married young and then wants kids right away is doing both to cover up for something or (worse) just trying to fit some fucked up expectation that got pounded into her by her upbringing. Having kids to try and cover up other issues is the express lane to hell, sir. I've said this before, but without knowing you better my gut tells me that you are in some serious shit here. I would not get tied down anymore until you work some of this pending shit out.
I don't know what you're talking about, but I'm talking about legitimate health concerns. We aren't some young couple, I'm 30 and she's 29.

She hasn't gone to the doctor yet, but based on my analytic mind something not right is going on. Obviously she's never tried to have a kid before, so we won't know for sure until she gets there. I freely posted the crack cream, but I can't really go much deeper on the issues here.
 

TheBeagle

JunkiesNetwork Donor
8,748
30,386
Sorry why? Personally I find even fairly light kink not exactly my thing. The one time I was trying to switch positions and she started blowing me I was just thinking "This is weird. That has to taste kind of funky. This really doesn't feel better than intercourse." And I find jizzing on a girl's face just outright disrespectful and chose not to do it even when she asked me to do it.
If, while having sex you use the word "intercourse" in your head, you are doing it SO wrong. Lol.

Dirty talk from Tenks - "I wanted to sit before the fire afterward, in freedom of dress, and dream of you and of loving you, intimately, until. I like to dream in loose, flowing garb, because I can dream more intently. And I did - to alarming release."

Ok that was Warren G. Harding, but still.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
607
Dirty talk from Tenks - "I wanted to sit before the fire afterward, in freedom of dress, and dream of you and of loving you, intimately, until. I like to dream in loose, flowing garb, because I can dream more intently. And I did - to alarming release."
I'm so hard right now
 

Nester

Vyemm Raider
4,978
3,183
I have posted many good things about my relationship on this site and have been accused of having a bangmaid (lol wife did not like that term by the way =D )

Noodle bro I feel you paid, we have had unexplained infertility issues for 5 years now. In the back of my mind I fear it could end us. It is a gut renching experience that few can understand if you have not been there. This started when we decided to have kids when we where both 30, I just turned 36 and she is 35 next month. We are now officially in the window of trouble (35+) We have seen doctor after doctor all of them saying the same thing until last month ?there is no medical reason this should not work? your young, just keep trying (medically via IVF)

My amazing wife becomes an emotional mess when ever kids are involved, my friends are now afraid to tell us they are expecting because she will burst into tears when she hears about someone elses good news. Its fucking horrible to know that the thing you want most in life is out of your reach no matter how hard you try, when any brain dead teenager can open there legs and find themselves on Maury. I am Canadian one of the few things the Canadian medical system DOES pay for is this treatment. We have done IVF 5 times, its $10-$18k per shot depending on where we need to go and if we need to stay abroad. Last time we went to a specialist in Las Vegas, we had to stay there for 2 weeks, it was not cheap.

Noodle it?s a painful thing you are going through and it gets worse with each friend or acquaintance pregnancy. All I can say is support your wife the best you can. If you have any questions or what to chat feel free to PM me.
 

Foggy

Ahn'Qiraj Raider
6,294
4,878
Sorry why? Personally I find even fairly light kink not exactly my thing. The one time I was trying to switch positions and she started blowing me I was just thinking "This is weird. That has to taste kind of funky. This really doesn't feel better than intercourse." And I find jizzing on a girl's face just outright disrespectful and chose not to do it even when she asked me to do it.
First, a girl that will blow you between positions is worth keeping around for a little while.
Second, of course it is disrespectful, that is why it is fun. We are better than them and there isn't a better way to get that point across!
 

Vandyn

Blackwing Lair Raider
3,656
1,382
I have posted many good things about my relationship on this site and have been accused of having a bangmaid (lol wife did not like that term by the way =D )

Noodle bro I feel you paid, we have had unexplained infertility issues for 5 years now. In the back of my mind I fear it could end us. It is a gut renching experience that few can understand if you have not been there. This started when we decided to have kids when we where both 30, I just turned 36 and she is 35 next month. We are now officially in the window of trouble (35+) We have seen doctor after doctor all of them saying the same thing until last month ?there is no medical reason this should not work? your young, just keep trying (medically via IVF)

My amazing wife becomes an emotional mess when ever kids are involved, my friends are now afraid to tell us they are expecting because she will burst into tears when she hears about someone elses good news. Its fucking horrible to know that the thing you want most in life is out of your reach no matter how hard you try, when any brain dead teenager can open there legs and find themselves on Maury. I am Canadian one of the few things the Canadian medical system DOES pay for is this treatment. We have done IVF 5 times, its $10-$18k per shot depending on where we need to go and if we need to stay abroad. Last time we went to a specialist in Las Vegas, we had to stay there for 2 weeks, it was not cheap.

Noodle it?s a painful thing you are going through and it gets worse with each friend or acquaintance pregnancy. All I can say is support your wife the best you can. If you have any questions or what to chat feel free to PM me.
If it really becomes impossible (due to circumstances out of your control), have you guys every considered adopting or even pregnancy via a surrogate?
 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,275
15,106
I have posted many good things about my relationship on this site and have been accused of having a bangmaid (lol wife did not like that term by the way =D )

Noodle bro I feel you paid, we have had unexplained infertility issues for 5 years now. In the back of my mind I fear it could end us. It is a gut renching experience that few can understand if you have not been there. This started when we decided to have kids when we where both 30, I just turned 36 and she is 35 next month. We are now officially in the window of trouble (35+) We have seen doctor after doctor all of them saying the same thing until last month "there is no medical reason this should not work" your young, just keep trying (medically via IVF)

My amazing wife becomes an emotional mess when ever kids are involved, my friends are now afraid to tell us they are expecting because she will burst into tears when she hears about someone elses good news. Its fucking horrible to know that the thing you want most in life is out of your reach no matter how hard you try, when any brain dead teenager can open there legs and find themselves on Maury. I am Canadian one of the few things the Canadian medical system DOES pay for is this treatment. We have done IVF 5 times, its $10-$18k per shot depending on where we need to go and if we need to stay abroad. Last time we went to a specialist in Las Vegas, we had to stay there for 2 weeks, it was not cheap.

Noodle it's a painful thing you are going through and it gets worse with each friend or acquaintance pregnancy. All I can say is support your wife the best you can. If you have any questions or what to chat feel free to PM me.
Thanks for the advice man, and good luck to yourself as well.

Right now we aren't really in the panic stage yet, but we will be soon. I think to me it is not as devastating, but I'm a very laid back person - I think I would be more sad when I see her upset like that. She hasn't cried yet, but everytime someone gets pregnant I hear the "why is it so easy for everyone else?" spiel.

Agree.. all these kids being born to teenagers who have no need for it, yet the ones who try often struggle.